I have finally realized that Mike the Lib has no grasp of reality.
Mike the Lip, your stupidity NEVER ceases to amaze me. You seem to be getting worse by the day.
To Michelle: “as a parent it’s her responsibility to raise her son correctly, and it looks like she’s trying to do just that.” The correct way to raise children is to teach them to think. Parents don’t want children to think, because the rules they lay down are in almost all cases arbitrary, created at whim by the parent to obtain personal satisfaction. That’s why whenever a child asks, ‘Why?’ it is viewed as a sign of disrespect, when, in fact, a thinking child will always ask why before modifying his or her behavior.
“parents are not on equal terms with children…they are above them until the kicds are self sufficient.” That philosophy will create more power-mongerers like you. It won’t create thinking children.
“do you ‘reason’ with your errant children?” Yes, you reason with them. That teaches them to reason. If you simply exert your power over them, that will teach them to exert their power over others. Naive parents like you may not realize it, but when Johnny hits his sister, or steals a toy from a neighborhood friend, or tells his little brother to do something for him, he is just following in the mold established by his parents. Instead of teaching your children that power determines behavior, you should teach them that reason determines behavior. That means reasoning with your children, encouraging them to question arbitrary rules and commands. Unfortunately, this would mean your children would no longer be your slaves, and that you would have to forego that power high you feel when your child obeys one of your arbitrary dictates. So it will never happen, and instead you will try to justify your behavior with stupid appeals to tradition.
It’s worth noting that although I have no children of my own, my best friend has two, and he and his wife raise their children according to this philosophy. These children think. You wouldn’t like them at all.
Thanks everyone for all your advice. She also threw shoes at her!
Power high from parenting? You’re shitting us right? Adults and children can’t be on equal footing. Kid don’t have the requisite experiences, many of those come only after adulthood, to make mature decisions about many things. Ever hear the saying “like a kid in a candy store”? Why isn’t it more like “like a mature, responsible adult in a candy store”?
I raised my kids to think, I also raised them to respect rightful authority. I would give them the chance to make their own decision if the possibility of immediate harm was small. I’d try to guide them in the correct direction when they needed it, and countermanded the stupid and/or dangerous decisions that they (mostly my son) made.
I wouldn't freak if I walked in on my kid in that situation. Shit like that happens at that age. I'd probably excuse myself for not knocking and leave. If they wanted to talk about it later then fine. I started quite early on the sexual education end of things and I'm sure my kids can make good decisions in that area of their lives.
I still have rules that I expect to not be broken. They aren’t arbitrary, and I explain the reason for them when I make the rule. They still have the ability to ignore the rules, but by doing so they know there are costs for doing so.
Thanks Mike for reminding me why I’m not a Libertarian. Since you don’t believe in government I guess you don’t believe in parenting also.
If you momma snapped you would not be able to write this cause the nurse in the hospital you were brought to would not let you get out of bed. Meaning you are lucky your momma didn’t beat you like you stole something… damn you are one dis-respectful kid. You don’t like it get out. Upset your gf has nightmares pay for her therapy.
I’m new here… and not sure why I am responding to this one first, maybe cuz I am a MOM. The first thing that came to my mind when I read this is… if I caught my son. I certainly wouldnt scream at them. I doubt I would have even walked in on them. However, if I had. And I saw what she saw. I think the first thing I would do is ask the girl over one day… alone… while my son was not around. And show her the video of me giving BIRTH to him! You wanna talk screams and nightmares…
luv
P.S. I hope you are using protection!!!
answer me this: are there rules in your house about you being with your girl friend? like is she allowed in your bedroom with the door closed? when i was growing up we weren’t even allowed to have boys upstairs, let alone in our bedrooms with the door shut. i am VERY sorry, you crossed the line. i’d string my kid up for that…and his or her ‘date’. it’s RUDE. and no…you don’t get to have a lock on the door. obviously you were ‘sneaking’ for a reason. when i lived away my host mom LET my host brother and his g/f sleep together in their house. she figured they might as well do it there, cause if not they were gonna do it somewhere else. but she was a ‘different’ type of woman. obviously your mom has a problem with that type of behavior in her house. you were in the wrong, as was your g/f, nightmares? tell her to grow up. give me a break
Look, I have to agree with Mike the Libertarian on this. Children need to be tought to think for themselves. Whet they DON’T need is an overprotective parent who treats a kid like an idiot and never lets it have or state an opinion. He is 17, for God’s sake! He NEEDS to have sex, and a mother should understand that. It wasn’t on a dinner table in front of everyone, it was IN HIS ROOM, WITH CLOSED DOORS. Whether or not you pay the bills in a household, you should have the decency to at least knock. It’s called respecting each others privacy. And what’s so disrespectful about doing it in the same house where your parents live? You puritan pukes. “Poor girl” is all I have to say.
“Is she allowed in your bedroom with the door closed?” “We weren’t even allowed to have boys upstairs?” Omygod! Omygod! Not in the bedroom! And with closed doors! Who knows what they could be doing inside! Omygod, etc. I don’t know, maybe that’s just how YOU were raised, it doesn’t mean it should apply to everyone. When I first had a girl over for sex (that was like 5 years ago, I’m 20), I told my folks so. They said “son, the condoms are in the top drawer, be good” and left the house. That’s how I was raised. I love my parents, maybe they raised me wrong, but I like the job they did. You know, when a kid reaches puberty, restricting his/her sexual life is likely to result in some long-term trauma of that kid. Repeat after me, having sex as a teen is normal. NOR-MAL. Lighten up, will ya?
well, Veljko, i’m sorry you had irresponsible parents. did they talk to you about the possibility of you becoming a father? did they talk to you about what you could catch? did they talk to you about the responsibilities involved with sex? if you answer NO to any of those then your parents dropped the ball. sorry if you think it is old fashioned, but sex =responsibility and 15 year olds are NOT responsible. neither are 17 year olds. this kid get his girlfriend pregnant and who is responsible for it? him? does he have the money and education to support a child? does she? come on THINK about this. sex is for adults NOT children.
Veljko, I am wondering if your parents did the same thing to your 15 year old sister (told her that the rubbers are in the top drawer and they will go out while you screws Humpo upstairs) or if this applies to only males in your country? Will you be buying rubbers for your 15 year old daughter some day so she can act normal and suck on Humpo Jr.'s noodle in your house with your blessing?