[quote]hedo wrote:
After a protien shake and some hard boiled eggs…you could do a drive by. (fart)
That usally empties the place out of aerobics folks.[/quote]
Canned chili works best, however don’t expect to do anything intensive otherwise it turns into shart-aerobics.
[quote]Kayrob wrote:
You could try to be a little more encouraging to these women given that the trainers are not getting the job done.
Things like a smack on the ass and a “nice set sugartits” a la Mel Gibson would be a nice start.[/quote]
Best advice thus far.
Clearly the answer is inclusion, not exclusion.
[quote]tom63 wrote:
Fart a lot as suggested. Basically gross behavior.
[/quote]
One very large meal of:
1 part insoluble fiber (eg. beans)
1 part high sulfur food (eg. onions)
1 part milk (assuming lactose tolerance)
and for flavor:
a few shots of tequila
This has absolutely devastating results. I’ve seen it cause grown men to cry, righteous old women to repeatedly take the Lord’s name in church, and fellow passengers attempt to flee a moving vehicle (while traveling on the interstate).
Use it wisely my son…
[quote]SWR-1240 wrote:
Or act like you’ve been using the machine before them and say something like:
“I don’t mind if you work in, but I just have 3 sets left, and my trainer wants me to keep my rests short.”
[/quote]
Could just tell them you were using the machine before and have an anal leakage problem and watch them run :O).
The best strategy so far has been to invade the aerobics class with a set of some kind of resistance exercise.
I imagine it could go down one of two ways:
The Easy Way
The Hard Way
To accomplish either plan, you must videotape the hen invasion of the weight room first, to get a baseline situation established in the minds of the viewers on YouTube, to which you will post everything once the lift is complete.
[quote]Tithonus81 wrote:
tom63 wrote:
Fart a lot as suggested. Basically gross behavior.
One very large meal of:
1 part insoluble fiber (eg. beans)
1 part high sulfur food (eg. onions)
1 part milk (assuming lactose tolerance)
and for flavor:
a few shots of tequila
This has absolutely devastating results. I’ve seen it cause grown men to cry, righteous old women to repeatedly take the Lord’s name in church, and fellow passengers attempt to flee a moving vehicle (while traveling on the interstate).
Use it wisely my son…[/quote]
Good call, but I would first ask someone to get a blackhead you just can’t reach.
You know, my gym has the exact same class. I was actually thinking of dressing up in 1980’s workout clothes with a band around my head and really high-cut shorts, and go in there and start doing power cleans and deadlifts.
I’ll let all of you know if I video tape it.
[quote]PGJ wrote:
texasguy wrote:
and the worst part, the gym managers and owners don’t even care! it is fucking ridiculous. i wonder what they would think if i walked in to the center of an aerobics class in the aerobics room and began deadlifting or powercleaning?
Dude, you don’t have a hair on your ass if you don’t walk right into the aerobics room in the middle of their class and start doing powercleans. Nice and loud, too and with lots of chalk. That would be classic! Please, please video tape it if you do it. If you are planning to find another gym, why not go out in style? You would be a T-Legend.
[/quote]
If you do the aerobics room invasion, you have to do it wearing nothing but a sock.
Sock over the cock?
A lot of very creative and funny ideas, guys!
Here’s some simple ones instead. Have you talked with other people in the gym who might have same problem. It would be better to confront management collectively. If you could find that this is some breach of your contract, you could even EACH individually threaten to take the manager to small claims court.
Otherwise, given that this gym has pretty much a monopoly in that town and, since there is no other gym to go to, they have you by the balls.
[quote]entheogens wrote:
A lot of very creative and funny ideas, guys!
Here’s some simple ones instead. Have you talked with other people in the gym who might have same problem. It would be better to confront management collectively. If you could find that this is some breach of your contract, you could even EACH individually threaten to take the manager to small claims court.
Otherwise, given that this gym has pretty much a monopoly in that town and, since there is no other gym to go to, they have you by the balls.[/quote]
Well now, that’s a nice reasonable idea, but not near as funny as training with a boner or being stinky, hahaha.
[quote]Cthulhu wrote:
You know, my gym has the exact same class. I was actually thinking of dressing up in 1980’s workout clothes with a band around my head and really high-cut shorts, and go in there and start doing power cleans and deadlifts.
I’ll let all of you know if I video tape it.
PGJ wrote:
texasguy wrote:
and the worst part, the gym managers and owners don’t even care! it is fucking ridiculous. i wonder what they would think if i walked in to the center of an aerobics class in the aerobics room and began deadlifting or powercleaning?
Dude, you don’t have a hair on your ass if you don’t walk right into the aerobics room in the middle of their class and start doing powercleans. Nice and loud, too and with lots of chalk. That would be classic! Please, please video tape it if you do it. If you are planning to find another gym, why not go out in style? You would be a T-Legend.
[/quote]
Please do it! I’m serious, you guys would be T-Legends. I really like the John Travolta 1980’s “Perfect” clothing idea. Make sure you make a huge mess with the chalk. Also need knee-high tube socks with the stripes at the top.
get yourself some really short shorts, I use my rugby shorts. Wear em to the gym with nothin underneath. Wait for the women to start gabbing, then find a place near them on the floor to start doing crunches, split stretches, etc… anything that gets your legs in the air and your shorts sliding up a bit. Grunt and make enough noise so they look over at you and get a nice eyeful of your sack.
Or…
wait for them to all finish and head back to the locker room. After a couple of minutes pull the fire alarm. Watch them all run out of the gym in towels and half dressed. sneak back into the locker room and take all their cloths, pile them up in the middle of the floor, and take a nice big leak on the pile. that’ll teach em.
I almost sprayed beer all over my keyboard!
[quote]Tithonus81 wrote:
tom63 wrote:
Fart a lot as suggested. Basically gross behavior.
One very large meal of:
1 part insoluble fiber (eg. beans)
1 part high sulfur food (eg. onions)
1 part milk (assuming lactose tolerance)
and for flavor:
a few shots of tequila
This has absolutely devastating results. I’ve seen it cause grown men to cry, righteous old women to repeatedly take the Lord’s name in church, and fellow passengers attempt to flee a moving vehicle (while traveling on the interstate).
Use it wisely my son…[/quote]
I will! I will!
[quote]tom63 wrote:
entheogens wrote:
A lot of very creative and funny ideas, guys!
Here’s some simple ones instead. Have you talked with other people in the gym who might have same problem. It would be better to confront management collectively. If you could find that this is some breach of your contract, you could even EACH individually threaten to take the manager to small claims court.
Otherwise, given that this gym has pretty much a monopoly in that town and, since there is no other gym to go to, they have you by the balls.
Well now, that’s a nice reasonable idea, but not near as funny as training with a boner or being stinky, hahaha.
[/quote]
It might work… I suggest u start talking with the other gym members.
LOL!
Thats exactly how I pictured it. And when I’m done doing the powercleans and have messy chalk all over myself and on the floor, I’m going to take a huge bucket of gatorade and dump it all over myself onto the floor like those old football teams used to do in the 1980’s.
[quote]PGJ wrote:
Cthulhu wrote:
You know, my gym has the exact same class. I was actually thinking of dressing up in 1980’s workout clothes with a band around my head and really high-cut shorts, and go in there and start doing power cleans and deadlifts.
I’ll let all of you know if I video tape it.
PGJ wrote:
texasguy wrote:
and the worst part, the gym managers and owners don’t even care! it is fucking ridiculous. i wonder what they would think if i walked in to the center of an aerobics class in the aerobics room and began deadlifting or powercleaning?
Dude, you don’t have a hair on your ass if you don’t walk right into the aerobics room in the middle of their class and start doing powercleans. Nice and loud, too and with lots of chalk. That would be classic! Please, please video tape it if you do it. If you are planning to find another gym, why not go out in style? You would be a T-Legend.
Please do it! I’m serious, you guys would be T-Legends. I really like the John Travolta 1980’s “Perfect” clothing idea. Make sure you make a huge mess with the chalk. Also need knee-high tube socks with the stripes at the top.
[/quote]
[quote]SWR-1240 wrote:
I plan on opening a gym.
I would LOVE to be able to use/start a T-Nation Gym franchise where Biotest supplements are sold exclusively, and the theme was one made by this site.
That would be my dream business.[/quote]
Everyone on T-Nation would tell you how great your gym is. Then they would all go to the cheapest place in town. Your gym would then go out of business.
Why are there so few hardcore gyms? Because there are so few people willing to pay the bucks.
Let’s face it: Rarely do people who start these posts not have other gym options. Instead of paying extra for a better gym, they take the cheap option.
Then they sign on an moan like it’s E-Nation.
Lunk alarms and all who giggle at them. Also hot pink/canary yellow on the equipment. FUCK YOU PF i want Reaction back. Judgement free zone my ass you hippocritical fucks.
[quote]SWR-1240 wrote:
Magarhe wrote:
T-Nation needs to start a chain of gyms around the country.
At these gyms none of this shite happens.
New members are given a list of rules to read and follow.
There is a store there that stocks Biotest supplements.
New gyms are opened by individual franchisee’s
There is an internet room with free connections to T-Nation, and you can pay to print articles in high quality colour.
Members can attend seminars cheap.
Locals who have never heard of T-Nation suddenly learn how to lift weights and - loh and behold - actually lift some.
Need I go on…?
I plan on opening a gym.
I would LOVE to be able to use/start a T-Nation Gym franchise where Biotest supplements are sold exclusively, and the theme was one made by this site.
That would be my dream business.[/quote]
That would be good but I can’t imagine T-Nation going for it. However I see no reason why you can’t do some of those things. I don’t know how the business side of things would work, running a gym - it might be tough financially to run it the way you would want ideally - but surely giving members some real information, getting them into T-Nation etc… will keep them coming back.
But maybe as a businees what you want are people paying for memberships then not turning up, and lots of new people coming along and doing that.
The best business model would be - if they don’t make good progress, they pay MORE! If you can sell that membership then you’ll be on a winner. 80% of your customers will make you rich (no progress, big fees), and 20% will make you famous (great progress)
good luck
[quote]CaliforniaLaw wrote:
SWR-1240 wrote:
I plan on opening a gym.
I would LOVE to be able to use/start a T-Nation Gym franchise where Biotest supplements are sold exclusively, and the theme was one made by this site.
That would be my dream business.
Everyone on T-Nation would tell you how great your gym is. Then they would all go to the cheapest place in town. Your gym would then go out of business.
Why are there so few hardcore gyms? Because there are so few people willing to pay the bucks.
Let’s face it: Rarely do people who start these posts not have other gym options. Instead of paying extra for a better gym, they take the cheap option.
Then they sign on an moan like it’s E-Nation.[/quote]
nope. it is the only gym in town, other than the school gym, which i mentioned opens at 9:00 am, which is too late for me.
sorry c-law. you are still just a dumb ass.