Some recommended reading related to the OP and other topics you’ve touched upon. And no, they’re not by goofballs trying to make a buck off of desperate people by fear mongering and conspiracy theories.
Bowling Alone: the Collapse and Revival of American Community by Robert Putnam
Sexual Utopia in Power: the Feminist Revolt Against Civilization by Dr. F. Roger Devlin
The Garbage Generation by Daniel Amneus
Taken into Custody by Dr. Stephen Baskerville
The New Politics of Sex: The Sexual Revolution, Civil Liberties, and the Growth of Governmental Power by Dr. Stephen Baskerville
The Boy Crisis by Dr. Warren Farrell
The War on Boys: How Misguided Feminism is Harming Our Boys by Christine Hoff Summers
Deaths of Despair and the Future of Capitalism by Angus Deaton and Anne Case
@Beyond_Beyond you might want to check some out. @anna_5588 I know you’re a bookworm. You might want to check some out too.
That kind of job would drive me crazy lol. Getting detailed breakdowns and summaries by analysts who know that I need to be handled like a moron so I can present the data to clients already almost does that. Big props to you.
But, seriously, can you elaborate more about what are the actual trends you are seeing?
Eh? I think we both know @EmilyQ is a psychologist (which is another job that would drive me crazy so big props to you @EmilyQ ) who has dealt with lots of clients with such issues. Just because she brings up person anecdotes doesn’t mean she isn’t taking society as a whole into account. I’m not a psychologist but I also use personal anecdotes as examples to illustrate some points I’m making while I present relevant data.
It’s very exaggerated now. Certainly is not unusual, but it’s has become more extreme. Couples in most cases no longer build together. And averaging 5 years means that the standard deviation around the mean has also grown, because 10, 15, 20 years difference is no longer unusual, but quite common.
There is more nuance to that. For a select group of men at the 10% of the distribution are bedding 80% of the women, while upwards of 30 to 40% of young men are getting no action at all.
So you are right, promiscuity is at an all time high. Women are far more sexually active than they used to be. But men are not, especially young men are getting left out in the cold.
Our young men are in crisis, there is no mistake about that. They are lonelier than ever before. Covid lockdowns damn sure haven’t helped. The data on young men are scary. So scary that it manifests physically. Young men have lower testosterone and lower sperm counts by such a margin that it’s measurable. I mean, how did external circumstances do something once thought to be controlled by genetics?
Men have been targeted for the past 50 and especially more strongly in the last 30 as the default ‘bad guy’. This 3rd wave feminism, which morphed into the post-modernist society we now live in have made young men the target of all derision.
According to radical feminist literature the idea wasn’t merely the attempt to raise women up, it was to raise women up at the expense of men so that women could ideally replace men. That has massive implications when you think about it. And it wouldn’t have been a problem if these ideas stayed in the corner with the radicals. But it rushed in with the post-modernist dystopia we now find ourselves in. And it’s costing lives.
Young men are not only hurting, but they are cast aside and mocked for finally having the feelings they were told for so long they should be having by these same radicals.
Bottom line, there is a man crisis, particularly a young man crisis. And we’d better pay attention, because consequences.
While feminists dream of full domination by replacing a patriarchy with a matriarchy, it is coming at the cost are our young men.
I don’t consider women going after men, nor men going after women promiscuous. I consider either, preferring to hook-up with as many partners as possible promiscuous.
I am familiar with these two. They were referenced in a lot of the stuff I read. It’s also interesting to looks at their sources and see the numbers for yourself. They tell a story… and IMO a story of feminism going to far. But it’s not just feminism, that was the start, postmodernism has taken every whacked out, messed up conception ever made and is attempting to weave it into the fabric of modern society as if lies were the truth.
Some guy named Jesus spoke about this once. It started with, “When you see the Abomination of Desolation standing in the holy place…” I never knew what the hell that meant. I wondered for years, what the hell is an ‘abomination of desolation’ and how would I recognize it when I saw it? I found out. Now I know.
I don’t know the statistics (honestly I don’t care) but it seems to me that big age differences are not as socially acceptable as they once were.
Can you imagine the reaction to a middle aged James Bond making out with a bond girl in her 20s nowadays?
How about when rockstars would bed (or marry) 14, 15, 16, year old groupies throughout the 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s?
Steven Tyler, Bowie, Page, Morrison, the Nuge…Elvis…
Or Roy Moore roaming the mall for teenage girls?
I wasn’t alive back then, but to me it doesn’t seem like it was a big deal to people in general. At least not as big it would be now. I admit this is only my perception.
I don’t examine these trends in detail at all. I’m just saying I do enough of this type of thinking at work to know that when I get nonsense answers to basic, logical questions about someone’s analysis there’s no point in pressing further.
I recommend Sexual Utopia in Power as a primer for all the rest. It’s a collection of essays and is available on Barnes & Nobles. Although it is not a stupid PUA book, I actually think that, despite having a satisfied life now, had I read it in my late teens or early 20’s I would’ve been married far sooner than I did and had four kids by now.
Exactly. Pat is an idiot. Larger age differences used to be the norm but now you have many people meeting in college so they are basically the same age.
Median Age at First Marriage: Geographic Variation, 2017
Family Profile Nov. 07, 2019
Author: Krista K. Payne
In this profile, the median age at first marriage is estimated for the nation and each state by gender for 2017 using 1-year estimates from the American Community Survey (ACS). Direct estimates of the age at which half of men and women (who in the last year) married for the first time as well as the associated margins of error are provided. The ACS has been collecting data on marriage for nearly a decade.
Trend in Median Age at First Marriage by Gender, 2008-2017
The U.S. median age at first marriage is at a historic highpoint.
Since 2008, the age at first marriage has increased by 1.9 years, reaching nearly 30 among men and 28 among women (Figure 1).
States with the Highest and Lowest Age Gaps in Median Age at First Marriage, 2017
Historically, men marry at later ages than women. The gender gap in the median age at first marriage tends to be about two years (1.8 in both 2008 and 2017). In contrast, reported ideal timing of marriage varied greatly by racial/ethnic category for young women.
However, this gap is not uniform across all states and instead ranges from as high as 3.5 years in Wyoming to as low as .10 years in Hawaii.
Hawaii is quite the exception; it is the only state in which the median age at first marriage among women (28.2) is greater than that of men (28.1).
States with the Highest and Lowest Median Age at First Marriage by Gender, 2017
Men living in New York have the highest median age at first marriage at 31.4 years. Conversely, men in Utah have the youngest median age at first marriage of 26.1.
Women who live in Washington, D.C. experienced the highest median age at first marriage (30.4), while women living in Utah had the lowest at 24.8.
Four states are ranked at the top for oldest ages at first marriage among both men and women —New York, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Washington D.C. Over the last decade, these states have had the highest ages at first marriage.
Four states rank at the bottom with the youngest ages at first marriage for both men and women—Oklahoma, Arkansas, Idaho, and Utah. These states have had the youngest ages at first marriage over the last decade.
Two years. Interestingly, three of the four states with the youngest age at first marriage are also listed on a list of states with the highest divorce rate:
There’s some sort of weird virtue signaling going on with all of this in our culture. “Oh, that 40-year-old with the beer gut is way hotter than that 17-year-old hurdler over there…because what kind of weirdo would ever find someone under 18 attractive? The 18th birthday is definitely not totally arbitrary.” and then women: “Oh, I love my husband’s dad bod. I’m definitely not more, secretly attracted to every guy that doesn’t look like a melting snowman.”
In relation to age difference, I remember an article (someone posted here, maybe?) where some women was lambasting Leonardo Dicaprio about dating women too young for him.
He couldn’t handle a real woman or something like that.
Tell you the truth, if the writer was an example of a real woman, I’d rather have the young models too.
