This was a no go for my husband from day one. My first delivery did not go well and I ended up leaking spinal fluid. I was on a 5 pound weight limit with a 9 pound baby from day one. My husband had to get up throughout the night, get the baby, change his diaper, bring him to me so I could breastfeed him, then return him to bed. That was our life for the first 6 weeks. I personally find men who engage with there children to be exceptionally attractive. Plus it’s good for the dad and the child. Who wants a detached father? Who wants a husband who procreates and then is like “peace out, enjoy raising that baby”. I think it helped my husband have a closer bond with our children.
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The Flat Brimmed Hat Crew. It should say across the front “Imma gitchu preynit and scram.” .
Bonus babydaddy points if he has a dumbass neck tat!
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Lol. I can’t tell you how many times I hear the phrase babydaddy at work. I hate it. It makes me cringe.
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Guess I should give a tip of the hat to those on the fatherhood thread. It’s nice to see them care enough to chat about it with other dads. When you work where I do, it sometimes kills your faith in men. (Well in women too, but that’s a different story all together).
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I can’t share my actual thoughts on what I think when I hear a woman use that. They’re as vile and repugnant as the phrase itself.
Yep.
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We tend to match a lot of “traditional” cliches. I am the breadwinner, I tend to be the dominant partner (but not in an over the top, domineering way) and our housework generally follows upkeep for her and maintenance for me. Meaning she does most of the laundry, dishes, sweeping et cetera. I fix things, mow the lawn, spray for bugs and so on. It just sort of works out this way though. Neither of us is trying to force a role, but she could be described as very “feminine” and I “masculine”, so there’s that. But it’s just how we are. And really I think chores follow schedule availability more than anything.
I’ve experienced this in person. Years ago when my daughter was a baby I took her to lunch on a random Tuesday or something. Minding our own business at a table and a couple sat next to me, probably in their 60’s. I do live in a small town where people randomly chat but they piped in with something like “weird to see a man with a baby during work hours” and “it sure was different in our time, men worked”.
I didn’t have the heart to tell them I haven’t seen shift labor since I was a teenager and people work for me now, while I feed my daughter saved breast milk in the restaurant booth.
But I found it a little interesting they’d take a swipe at masculinity. I’m 6’1, 235 pounds and look like I spend time in weight rooms. Somehow spending time with my daughter which always included diaper changes, bottles and burping really put them off. I wonder what they would’ve thought if they knew I would use the women’s restrooms for changing tables since men’s rooms never had them. With restaurant permission and door guarding.
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I can’t personally understand why I would not want to spend time with and take care of our kids, even when it included diaper changing.
As for housekeeping, it’s a no brainer. We do have some division with responsibilities. I usually clean the bathrooms, and spend more time in the kitchen (and who cooks, cleans). My wife looks much more after laundry for example. These aren’t hard lines, but how we generally do things. Earlier when I spoke about manchilds etc. I was referring to guys who don’t do anything at house ever and expect full service all the time.
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Thanks! Its more like “as good as I’m gonna get” but I’ll take it. 
. I’ve lost about 80% of my capacity for work/physical exertion, but I make the best of it.
Mine too. My way of thinking and doing is as if we each made a shopping list. I go to the stores and get x, y, & z. She gets a, b, & c. Nether one of us get the same things, but everything that each of us get is used by the other.
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Interesting. I haven’t dated in a very long time but through articles and commentary I’ve seen it seems like everything is very categorical and transactional now. Labeled, compartmentalized et cetera.
If I break the article down to base concept, it suggests people often look for physical attraction, which is framed as bad, then will sometimes settle for a less physically attractive person whom they like.
To me this just sounds like dating. I’m not sure what the new phenomenon is, aside from giving it the title “shrekking”.
I do remember “hog hunting” being a thing.
Ideally we all find someone we are compatible with and attracted to. But I think it’s just natural to let attraction lead. I’m not sure I understand the problem with pursuing someone you’re physically attracted to. It’s important, imo. I couldn’t be in a relationship with a woman I didn’t want to have sex with.
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I’ve been having an ongoing Q&A with my son called “The Talk” , him having just turned 13 and all.
He brought up attraction in the course of discussions. I told him that meeting girls and starting relationships starts at a distance. Like first, you see them. Across a classroom, at a common event, what ever- she catches your attention and/or you catch theirs.
Then there’s smiles, glances, notes passed & whatnot, and the distance closes. Then talking, hand holding, etc.
Its just the natural course of things. Like, now if people don’t score the ultimate, they are unhappy, when there are plenty of increments between ultimate and “nope!” that are perfectly good and in many cases better than the big wow factor hot chick.
I’d like for him to have a more ballanced understanding of relationships on the whole than the contemporary all or nothing attitude we see on display.
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OMG WHAT???
I still remember you posting about his school assignments from first or second grade
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I had the same reaction.
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Yep! So now we’ve gone from this:
To this:
He’s lucky we’re related. Its all fun & games till we break out the cake. 
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It goes so quickly.
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It really does!
I still remember that first pic, and many others.
Now he’s showing ME how to model ratio equations.
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idk, it doesn’t look like you have long before he’s going to be the undisputed king of the cake
He looks like a really strong kid
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He is. 
. He finally got weight lifting in gym class and loves it. I showed his gym teacher his pics from when he was just a tyke. 
.
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Exactly. It’s just how things are. Even in nature animals work hard to be attractive.
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Quote: “Finally, men who tended to worry or feel anxious, displaying what psychologists call neuroticism, were less likely to have a partner.“
When I was an in… ahem…excuse me… a young guy who wanted a girlfriend, my therapist said, “You don’t have a girlfriend because you worry too much”.
There was a pretty girl in high school who had a crush on me who told someone, “He acts like he can’t have a girlfriend.” I hardly knew her and don’t recall saying much more than “hi” to her.
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