I’ll be graduating college in a few weeks and this means I will be moving 300 miles away from home so start a career. I grew up in a small town and lived this town my whole entire life. I have been friends with the same people for 22 years now ha ha. And now it seems like my world is crashing in on me. I know I will meet new people to where I am moving to but it seems that they will be only be acquaintances.
In all reality I only consider myself to have a few “friends”. I would like to meet new women when I move too but I am unsure of how to do this. It looks weird if I go the bar myself, and whatnot. Idk, I think I am worrying too much about this, but does anyone have any advice from when they graduated college and started off on their own?
-Yeah, you’ll make a lot of acquaintances and very few friends. This is normal.
-Be open to going out and doing things. Be blunt. “Hi, I’m new in town. What’s fun to do here?” Even if it’s something you aren’t really into, at first at least, you might as well go.
-Go to a gym. Find a club or activity you like. Use the 'net. Join a team. Make acquaintances there. They may become friends later.
-There will probably be some tough spots. Expect them. It’s normal.
-Use the 'net for dates. I really was never successful at it, but I’ve had tons of friends who met some amazing people. A few are married now.
And since this IS T-Nation: when in doubt or bored, go to the gym and lift something heavy.
[quote]Gambit_Lost wrote:
Take it from someone who has moved a lot:
-Yeah, you’ll make a lot of acquaintances and very few friends. This is normal.
-Be open to going out and doing things. Be blunt. “Hi, I’m new in town. What’s fun to do here?” Even if it’s something you aren’t really into, at first at least, you might as well go.
-Go to a gym. Find a club or activity you like. Use the 'net. Join a team. Make acquaintances there. They may become friends later.
-There will probably be some tough spots. Expect them. It’s normal.
-Use the 'net for dates. I really was never successful at it, but I’ve had tons of friends who met some amazing people. A few are married now.
And since this IS T-Nation: when in doubt or bored, go to the gym and lift something heavy. [/quote]
This is all excellent advice. Totally agree about the net-dating…don’t knock it until you’ve tried it! I gave it a whirl and was surprised by the amount of quality women on there (doctors, lawyers…few to no mental issues, full sets of teeth…the works!)
Making acquaintances is easy. Making good friends, not so much. It takes time.
Dude I know that feel. I just graduated a month ago and I had to stop talking to some of my friends. Now that im out of school I have all this extra free time but most of my friends hate me because I had to stop talking to them because of school or their schedule sucks too. Forget about making friends at work,I work at a freakin’ church. You try talking to them about weight lifting or football your faith is question right off the bat. I dont even want to get into talking about my sex life either,thats shot to shit.
[quote]Gambit_Lost wrote:
Take it from someone who has moved a lot:
-Yeah, you’ll make a lot of acquaintances and very few friends. This is normal.
-Be open to going out and doing things. Be blunt. “Hi, I’m new in town. What’s fun to do here?” Even if it’s something you aren’t really into, at first at least, you might as well go.
-Go to a gym. Find a club or activity you like. Use the 'net. Join a team. Make acquaintances there. They may become friends later.
-There will probably be some tough spots. Expect them. It’s normal.
-Use the 'net for dates. I really was never successful at it, but I’ve had tons of friends who met some amazing people. A few are married now.
And since this IS T-Nation: when in doubt or bored, go to the gym and lift something heavy. [/quote]
This is all excellent advice. Totally agree about the net-dating…don’t knock it until you’ve tried it! I gave it a whirl and was surprised by the amount of quality women on there (doctors, lawyers…few to no mental issues, full sets of teeth…the works!)
Making acquaintances is easy. Making good friends, not so much. It takes time. [/quote]
Im a little skeptical of it myself but I might try it myself. I would be still embarrassed to tell my friends that I met my girlfriend on the Internet. Try to make that not sound weird. Its kinda difficult.
[quote]Gambit_Lost wrote:
Take it from someone who has moved a lot:
-Yeah, you’ll make a lot of acquaintances and very few friends. This is normal.
-Be open to going out and doing things. Be blunt. “Hi, I’m new in town. What’s fun to do here?” Even if it’s something you aren’t really into, at first at least, you might as well go.
-Go to a gym. Find a club or activity you like. Use the 'net. Join a team. Make acquaintances there. They may become friends later.
-There will probably be some tough spots. Expect them. It’s normal.
-Use the 'net for dates. I really was never successful at it, but I’ve had tons of friends who met some amazing people. A few are married now.
And since this IS T-Nation: when in doubt or bored, go to the gym and lift something heavy. [/quote]
This is all excellent advice. Totally agree about the net-dating…don’t knock it until you’ve tried it! I gave it a whirl and was surprised by the amount of quality women on there (doctors, lawyers…few to no mental issues, full sets of teeth…the works!)
Making acquaintances is easy. Making good friends, not so much. It takes time. [/quote]
Im a little skeptical of it myself but I might try it myself. I would be still embarrassed to tell my friends that I met my girlfriend on the Internet. Try to make that not sound weird. Its kinda difficult.
[/quote]
If your friends will look you down because you met your girlfriend on the internet…they are not your friends.
Also, I feel guilty for enjoying staring at your avatar.