Krak

Here’s an email that I sent to my buddies about my first yoga experience last night. I should preface by saying that I did this for two reasons, 1. Better flexibility for kickboxing 2. Meet hot chicks that can bend in crazy positions.

Let's see here..... Don't judge a book by it's cover Walk a mile in someone else's shoes Don't laugh out loud when you see someone in a goofy yoga pose until you try it first Several 100 lbs. woman are a lot tougher than Rob and I

I don’t think this is really inspirational but I’ve got to share my Yoga experience with you all.

Rob and I arrived 10 minutes early so we could assure ourselves a spot on the floor. After signing in, and signing up for multiple classes (that was Rob’s idea) we dropped our shoes off in the dressing room and headed into this crazy torture chamber known as the Yoga floor. The kind of Yoga that we did is called Bikram Yoga. What separates this type from other styles is the heat.

The room is set to 105 degrees with a humidity level set between 60-70%. That is the temperature and humidity BEFORE you get about 25 bodies sweating and stretching, in my case I was doing more trembling than stretching. We started with a few minutes of breathing that was really supposed to get the blood flowing, you inhale for 6 seconds and then exhale for 6 seconds. This first exercise set the tone for the rest of my workout. I breathed in for about 2 seconds and I was ready to breath out, so I did. I don’t know why but I’m thinking it was the fact that I was dripping with sweat after 5 minutes into this. When you first arrive you put a towel down where you plan on working out. Notice that my towel was nice and dry when I got there.

After the breathing we started doing some of the poses. I can’t begin to remember all of the names of them but there was this one, I’m thinking it was the TREE pose. You are wrapping your arms around each other and then balancing on one foot while the other foot is tucked into the crook or your hip. Don’t even try to visualize it but trust me, I felt like a one legged cat trying to bury turds on a frozen pond. It was difficult. We did several more of this poses and it’s not a stretch that we do when we are getting ready to box or kick.

Think of a torture device that has no ropes or barb wire, the true torture comes from a few things: 1. Gravity, gravity is supposedly your friend, apparently I have upset gravity recently and she had her way with me. 2. This heat, I’m talking Africa hot. I might as well have been trying to breath underwater, I was so sweaty I need a snorkel. Rob and I conveniently sat next to the monster heater/furnace that keep this room hot. 3. Pride, here I come, big bad Mike, I’m going to show Yoga a thing or two. Starting at the bottom is never fun but I was surrounded by some people that could have been Chinese acrobats. Feeling slow and stupid is never fun, unless it’s a Friday night.

At last it was time to do the sitting poses, thank god I no longer had to worry about my balance, just sit and do some relaxing stretches. Not so. Without getting into detail these were just as hard as the standing ones. I must say that I really enjoy the SAYZAH position, you lie there and stare at the ceiling with your palms up. Many a times the instructor had to remind me to open my eyes and stare. Anytime the instructor said, good you guys, or not quite, it was pretty obvious she was talking to Rob and I.
There were two poses that I couldn’t do at all, the camel and the rabbit. In real life, two animals I don’t fear. In Yoga, two animals that could snap my neck/back like a dry twig.

That towel that I mentioned before, well it weighed about 6 pounds when I left.

There were many times I was laughing in class, it was mainly due to looking at the exhaustion in Rob’s face. A few times I did hear him “snoring” while we were relaxing in SAYZAH.

At one point we were in this position and the instructor told us that if we felt nauseous, light headed or dizzy........ right when she said that I couldn't wait for her to say, "Get some water." Instead she said this "If you feel nauseous, light headed or dizzy, that perfectly normal at all levels, just push it." No break for me.

All in all I would have to say that I really liked it. I like that fact that it’s something I will have to work hard to be proficient at. The only person that talked during class was the instructor. Yoga seems to be a pretty personal thing. I don’t know if I reach a higher spiritual plane or anything like that, but I am sore, I sleep great and feel energized today.
I’m going to start doing it Fridays and Sundays so I don’t have to skip boxing.

KRAK- You are a pimp! I have been trying to tell people here about BIKRAM’s YOGA, but they don’t wanna here that. I have been supplementing my workout with yoga for over a year now and my body is much more balanced for it. Not to mention nothing will get you more ripped. Just a tip…If that was your first time I suggest you go at least four times a week for two weeks then go back to two day a week and your other w/o routine. It is just a lot easier if you crank out your first few times as close together as possible. Just wait until that insane concentration that you are developing in there starts to crossover to other areas of your life. Keep it up KRAK!!!

Great workout right? In time it will help your combative work tremendously. In faith, Coach Davies

Damn, you could see that I’m so out of whack today that I titled the thread “Krak” and my name is what should have been the post titled. Oh well, yea my back feels as if I did about 20 sets of deads. I will stick with it because it challenges me. I get bored fast if I don’t have something to conquer. Thanks for the support. By the way, you should see the tail running around in these classes, it’s unreal.

This has to be one of the funniest post I have ever seen on this forum.

Reminds me of the time I took the “Ex. Cycling Class”… Ex. does not mean “Express 30 min class” like the hottie at the desk told me. It means Experienced. So, I experienced pure hell for an hour.

Good luck with the Yoga…

Man, you guys sure are behind the times!! Yoga is so out of style it’s not even funny. Pilates is the stuff now, nobody does yoga anymore.

Natey, you’re totally right, since it’s not hot in Hollywood anymore and some people spend tons of cash on some Pilates classes I should really get with the times. I am a dumbfuck. I have also been studing some martial arts that are thousands of years old, I suppose I should live in the now because the past has nothing to offer me.

Just kidding, I had to be a dick. Just because it’s not popular doesn’t mean I won’t do something. Public masturbation used to be cool, it’s not now but I still do it.