[quote]LankyMofo wrote:
If you’re 18 now, the fights should stop pretty soon anyway. [/quote]
There’s always drunken brawls at frat houses and bars to look forward to if you go away to college.
[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
i didn’t take advice from it. [/quote]
Maybe you should. Lots of badasses read the bible. Its a great book.
[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
i didn’t take advice from it. i only recently found that he too turned the other cheek.
I will never forget the quote from Ghandi, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind”[/quote]
A man who lets himself be walked on is not a man. Grow a spine and don’t take shit. This doesn’t mean you should become the asshole who starts it, but by god, be the one who finishes it. If that finishing is by talking, perfect!, but if you need to lay someone out, do it. You’ll know when it can’t be avoided. Your survival instinct will kick in.
I also like Bas Rutten’s philosophy: “I don’t believe in an eye for an eye. I believe in two eyes for an eye.”
If someone steps up to do harm to me, my friends or family, I will put them down without hesitation. It’s not a matter of being foolish, or gratuitously violent, or lacking compassion. You, or someone else, could end up dead when you stand still like a coward. It is better to beat someone else to a pulp than allow yourself, or someone else, to be hospitalized or buried.
Pacifists will always claim to take the high road, but letting yourself get pushed around doesn’t make you a pacifist, it makes you spineless. The kind of person that this society wants you to be, so that you’re easier to control.
There is no shame in defending yourself.
[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
i didn’t take advice from it. i only recently found that he too turned the other cheek.
I will never forget the quote from Ghandi, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind”[/quote]
You’re right. Let someone make you blind, and then you won’t be able to see people that mess around with you after that. Problem solved. You won’t need to worry about retaliating if you can’t see the guy.
Watch this movie.
Now no, I am not advocating living your life after this very considerable role-model but, take the philosophy, understand it and make it work for you.
[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
I’ve lived my whole eighteen years of my life getting taken advantage of by other people and not defending myself. I never like fighting back and probably never will. I have always been the center of jokes, blamed for everything, and taken advantage of. I’ve lost count as to how many people hit me on a regular basis because they know I won’t do anything back to them.
I’ve been anti-violent my whole life and only now am I thinking its time to change. I’ve only recently read the “turn the other cheek” protocal in the bible and to “love thy enemy” but I’m thinking otherwise. I guess its true that nice guys finish last. However at the same time, my mind and heart are telling me to have patience and the second I give in to them, they win.
What are your opinions about this? Shall I let them hit me and take advantage of me, or am I doing the right thing?[/quote]
Are you serious with that question?
Hit the motherlickers back HARD!!! Let them eat their own teeth.Only the strong survive!
[quote]bushidobadboy wrote:
I never fight, but then I never have to.
5 years of Bushido karate gave me that manner that says ‘I don’t back down, unless I know I’m in the wrong’.
3 years of swordplay gave me the ability to instantaneously switch on a level of focus, that generally makes most people take a mental step back.
But having said all that, I DO NOT go looking for trouble, because there is ALWAYS someone harder than you are. Or there is the borderline psycho that you can only ‘beat’ by killing. I’m talking about the kind of character as displayed by Joe Pesci in ‘Casino’. They are out there, unfortunately.
So, in answer to your question, I would say that you have to let people know that you won’t be pushed around, but neither should you do this by violent method.
You are at a disadvantage though because you have already allowed others to pigeonhole you as a doormat…
Bushy[/quote]
Good post. I also consider losing the “doormat” image the key to solving the issue.
Fight and you’ll have problems, regardless if you win or lose. In some cases, winning could turn out just as bad as losing. Don’t fight and you’ll always question yourself for not standing your ground.
[quote]michael2507 wrote:
bushidobadboy wrote:
I never fight, but then I never have to.
5 years of Bushido karate gave me that manner that says ‘I don’t back down, unless I know I’m in the wrong’.
3 years of swordplay gave me the ability to instantaneously switch on a level of focus, that generally makes most people take a mental step back.
But having said all that, I DO NOT go looking for trouble, because there is ALWAYS someone harder than you are. Or there is the borderline psycho that you can only ‘beat’ by killing. I’m talking about the kind of character as displayed by Joe Pesci in ‘Casino’. They are out there, unfortunately.
So, in answer to your question, I would say that you have to let people know that you won’t be pushed around, but neither should you do this by violent method.
You are at a disadvantage though because you have already allowed others to pigeonhole you as a doormat…
Bushy
Good post. I also consider losing the “doormat” image the key to solving the issue.
Fight and you’ll have problems, regardless if you win or lose. In some cases, winning could turn out just as bad as losing. Don’t fight and you’ll always question yourself for not standing your ground.[/quote]
Exactly right. Bushy's and this post are the ones to take to heart. Everyone is telling this kid to fight. For what? So he can really get his ass kicked to shit? Or possibly get seriously fucking hurt?
Give him some solid advice you "studs". Fuck, just start training yourself at the ground level, weights martial arts or a combo. You will achieve all that you really want to if you give it your all little man.
Yeah let's tell him to start fighting anyone who fucks with him. Wow, you guys are really looking out for our boy now aren't you? Just lay low, try not to take shit, but wait until you get some physical prowess before you get your ass really kicked. Then it will be you who is doing the ass beatin. Ok guy?
Now go eat something and lift some weights.
ToneBone
[quote]meangenes wrote:
Watch this movie.
Now no, I am not advocating living your life after this very considerable role-model but, take the philosophy, understand it and make it work for you.[/quote]
You mean Tyler’s philosophy, Nihilism? That’s the most bullshit philosophy ever.
[quote]B.b. in stress! wrote:
i didn’t take advice from it. i only recently found that he too turned the other cheek.
I will never forget the quote from Ghandi, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind”[/quote]
Gandhi also professed that, in the face of harm, one should rather opt for violence than to become a coward hiding behind the facade of nonviolence.
[quote]pushharder wrote:
Kenny Rogers sang a song just for you.[/quote]
Know when to hold em,
know when to fold em???
[quote]meangenes wrote:
Watch this movie.
Now no, I am not advocating living your life after this very considerable role-model but, take the philosophy, understand it and make it work for you.[/quote]
You know that story was written by a gay man, right?
[quote]Chewie wrote:
pushharder wrote:
Kenny Rogers sang a song just for you.
Know when to hold em,
know when to fold em???[/quote]
Islands in the stream, that is what we are…
To the OP, read The Cask of Amontillado.
That should sum things up. Keep your friends close, your enemies closer.
Seriously, use your brain. If you can outsmart someone, you are much better off. If someone is messing with you because they are drunk, buy them a couple more until they puke. Act as if they aren’t as badass when they aren’t up to have another drink.
Tell them they are OK to drive watch them try to get into their car and get arrested. Take pictures from afar.
OP~
I was the fat picked on kid for most of my life growing up. Then I joined the wrestling team in HS so you would think it would be all better since I learned to “fight” right? Nope I became the overly skinny kid still got picked on.
You know what the problem was? I was trying to be like everyone else. When I broke out of my own, worn the clothes no one else was wearing, hung out with new kids, people started respecting me because I was my own person. I no longer let people decide who I should be.
Wanna know what happened next? I didn’t get picked on any more nor did I get into fights. The “cool” kids that once made fun of me or tired to start a fight now wanted to be my friend. I said F-off to them though, I wouldn’t forget what happened.
When one of them would get mad at me and try and make fun of my clothes or something stupid like that no one listened to them.
Doing this not only helped my situation but gave me self confidence that I didn’t need peoples’ approval to be who I was. I learned to stand my ground and yea in college it came to blows a few times, but that was because I wouldn’t let some drunk red-neck punch a girl (happened 2x).
Moral of the story is to break out and find out who you want to be. Don’t wimp out because you are worried you might not fit in or someone might not like you. Be yourself and don’t back down when people try and force you into a role they want you in.
Man if I could change my life around I know you can. I went from a fat ass kid with pretty much no friends who did wayyy too many drugs so he could have something in common with someone and escape the real world to where I am now anyone can.
Oh and once I realize my dream of making it into a fitness magazine I plan on sending a copy to the people who made fun of me and beat the hell out of me for years on end for being fat. Haha after all they were my motivation for lifting weights 
Everyone,
Thank you very much for all the replies. However, I don’t think actually ‘fighting’ him will do any harm. There is a guy at my work who keeps patting my back and neck hard, to the point where it sounds like a slap, because he says he likes my muscularity and apparently it feels good to stroke muscle. Theres another guy at my work who encourages me stand up for myself but even to this day, I won’t let myself.
This type of situation hasn’t happened since the eighth grade; in high school, no one really physically took advantage of me, everyone just made me the center of jokes because it was ‘easy’ and ‘fun’. This was when I began weightlifting and easily became one of the bigger guys in school, so I’m sure they didn’t want to do anything physical.
Well back to the fucker at my work, I’ve found the reason why I don’t want to do anything is because I simply just don’t want to deal with confrontation - why do I even have to tell him to stop in the first place? Why can’t he just stop? Why does he have to hit me so hard? I guess I don’t have a spine, but still he asks me, “man you must hate it when I hit you. Here, hit me. Cmon…” but then I digress and back off because I can’t touch anyone - something in my brain tells me not to. Maybe I should ask him the three aforementioned questions and hope he’ll change.
Oh, and to those conservative, red-neck, testosterone-ridden idiots (you know who you are) who tell me to “kick his ass!”, “kick anyone’s ass who touches you!”, you’re really not helping at all. In fact, you’re just making me want to stay the way I am. Thanks to everyone else besides ^.
[quote]FightingScott wrote:
meangenes wrote:
Watch this movie.
Now no, I am not advocating living your life after this very considerable role-model but, take the philosophy, understand it and make it work for you.
You mean Tyler’s philosophy, Nihilism? That’s the most bullshit philosophy ever. [/quote]
Well, the movie sucked in general.
[quote]pushharder wrote:
Chewie wrote:
pushharder wrote:
Kenny Rogers sang a song just for you.
Know when to hold em,
know when to fold em???
Nope. More like,
…I promised you, dad, not to do the things you done.
I walk away from trouble when I can.
Now please dont think Im weak, I didnt turn the other cheek,
And papa, I sure hope you understand:
Sometimes you gotta fight when youre a man.[/quote]
→ Coward of the county
Chewie the song you’re thinking of is The Gambler