Sounds nice, but the what if’s always cripple me. I stayed in a horrible marriage for a while because of the what if’s. Which, in theory would make this easier, but it doesn’t 
.
I guess Charles Darwin had a pros and cons list for marrying a woman vs owning a dog. It was a close call I guess and IIRC, he married his cousin. Really smart dude, but a bit odd.
I don’t think there is a specific person for everybody. Probably over a million women I could be happy with, and I found one of them. It is quite the phenomenon how many find their one soul mate at their place of employment.
I didn’t have a light bulb moment or anything, but I can’t imagine being without her.
I think my biggest issue is I’m not sure if it’s I couldn’t imagine being with out her, or if I couldn’t imagine being alone. Deep shit. Can’t figure it out lol
I also have trouble with the things that “bother” me. Are they legit things, things, that don’t matter, things that I’m making to be more than they are? And so on.
Idk if I buy into the soul mates thing or not. I’m kinda leaning towards there are plenty of people who could make you happy at different levels. I guess the trick is finding the level of happiness you’re content with? Big mystery
I think it is logical to pursue being happy. I think if you are unsure, why not date longer? Try to be sure of yourself as possible when you make any decision of that magnitude.
I think there are people who could be happy with a billion people on this earth, and others who would only be happy with a much smaller number of people (or none at all). My wife and I are type B people who are pretty chill. I would have a tough time with a type A who was always pushing me on things.
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Yea that’s the plan. Just keep going lol. I just fear I’ll never know what the right decision is, and if I do, I’d simply choose the easier option. Wether right or wrong.
I think he is looking for a human.
I think so too.
For my sake I hope you’re not always right or else I have a fuckton of catching up to do because I went out with girls twice this year, and a grand total of 11 in my 30 years on this planet
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If you met your wife before you met A LOT of women in the years prior, then she wouldn’t be your wife?
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if @Californiagrown is correct, I might as well give up and get a cat
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Hell you got me beat with 11 I’m 28
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This is what scares the hell out of me. It would suck to look back 5 years later and realize THE one got away.
My wife is the second girl I ever dated. Going on 14 years married soon. Sometimes you knock it out of the park early.
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Some people get lucky. Some settle too early. Some met The Right One early on but didn’t realize till the met a bunch more right ones.
It’s just general advice. I think meeting s lot of potential partners helps you learn and realize what traits you do truly value, and what aren’t actually that important. It also increases your chances of finding the mate that fits you like a puzzle piece. I get 1 chance at marriage, so I wanted to be 100% sure I was with The Right One. YMMV.
Depends on the person. Marriage is a huge deal and should be treated as a 1-shot thing IMO. If I get 1 shot at the most important decision of my life, ya damn straight I’m gonna do the research and testing to make sure I give myself the best chance at choosing right.
That said, marriage is certainly not for everyone, and you should be honest with yourself how important it actually is to you.
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Maybe your perceived or maybe even imagined lack of ‘substance’ is what prevents you from getting a proper relationship as opposed to just a hook up or fling etc.
Also, if you grew up having a mental illness, severe mental illness especially can arrest or even arguably regress a person’s emotional development and ability to learn even more generally, which may explain why you have difficulties getting what you want out of life.
You also seem quite functional as opposed to visceral in how you view women. Most guys who want a good women in their life talk about the human qualities they like in women (like being caring, funny affectionate etc) as opposed to their potential to produce quality offspring and be really hot etc.
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The bar is set rather low for him so unless he’s mentally ill like you (although being a moron isn’t technically a mental illness) he should move out of the house at a much younger age than you. And that will make him more of a success than you could ever be.
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Because they aren’t trolls.
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Surrogacy?
It is if IQ = below 70
The concept of a nuclear family is still the designated norm, you may be entrenched within cultural extremes if this has become uncommon within your societal paradigm. I can put together some arguments as to why the “nuclear family” may not be optimal but at that point I’d be coming across as edgy for the sake of being edgy. IMO the benefits associated with having a nuclear family probably outweigh the perceived disadvantages.