I Finally Stopped Getting Out of the Way

…and it was sweet!

So…I am usually the type of person to give strangers their space and the respect I would like. Espescially when going to work. I work in downtown manhattan which is a real rat race, usually on my way to my mind numbing job, I dodge umbrellas, speeding women, strollers, cell phone talkers…and you get the point.

It seems like I am always walking sideways. Im not the smallest guy in the world so I dont want to plow into someone, I dont want to be an asshole, yet somehow I always seem to be making the first move to get out of the way.

Yesterday, was a tremendously shitty day in NYC rainy and windy, umbrellas were jacking me, and as usual here I am trying to be courteuous, this one middle - aged corporate type guy, as I was trying to get out of the way FUCKING plowed into me, actually caught me off guard, and as usual he sped away. I stopped, thought about confronting him and thought better of it, cuz Im not 20 Im 34. But I did tell myself if I saw him again I was gonna hip check him like I was Darius Kasparitus!

I got my wish…Chambers street and Broadway, perfect timing. He was looking down seemingly unaware of what was coming, his brooks brothers suit was staring at me and coming closer, I sped up like Chris Johnson hitting a hole…BAMMMMMM I FUCKING FLOORED HIM! ASS FIRST! LOOKED DOWN AND SAID THATS FOR YESTERDAY, SHOW SOME RESPECT! (he didnt say a word)…IT FELT GOOD TO TAKE THE LOW ROAD FOR ONCE!

Now I will go back to avoiding people and being the courteous person that I have become, but it felt good to give some fucktard what he had coming.

MXL

Lol awesome

I’m not gonna lie, it’s tough to think you did the wrong thing given your build up. I’m going to say Good on you Matt

Nice work Matty.

hahah…that’s the best!

What goes around comes around, he got what was comin’ to him!

So some random guy accidentally bumped into you and then you saw him again and ran at him when he wasn’t looking and knocked him to the ground?

You need to grow the fuck up.

You just committed assault by the way.

I go to NYC once a year for a couple of days for work…

You should do it again tomorrow.

[quote]celtics2022 wrote:
So some random guy accidentally bumped into you and then you saw him again and ran at him when he wasn’t looking and knocked him to the ground?

You need to grow the fuck up.

You just committed assault by the way.[/quote]

Dude, your back is huge!

I hate this shit, everyone seems to think they are they center of the universe. I am the same way, generally courteous, but people seem to take advantage.

Last year I had taken my wife and two preteen girls to a concert. As we are leaving I see this college age guy coming towards us with his head down, purposely running into people. I keep walking and I see him glance up, lining me up. I’m not the biggest guy, but at 5’10"ish and 210 I’m reasonably solid.

So just as he gets to me I stop, plant my feet and lean a shoulder into him. BOOM, he hits the ground like he ran face first into an I beam. I gave him a “oh sorry man” and kept walking. Looking ahead I see a girl he had just ran into laughing her ass off. Good times.

well played. you should make a weekly game of it. people suck.

[quote]Testy1 wrote:
I had taken my wife and two preteen girls [/quote]

You poor bastard, I take back any bad thing I may have said to you ever. lol

That house must be challenge to live in.

Not saying you have a bad life or family, I just know a couple of guys with teenage daughters…

I have a feeling that Celtics has a really bad stutter in real life. I dunno, just my feeling.

One time in college I saw two dudes walking head down, one texting, one sorting out his ipod. They were going at a good tick as there isnt much time between if you have back-to-back classes. Sure enough they both go tits first into each other, double head-butt, and down onto their respective asses. Just like young kids playing hockey that dont know how to stop.

The best part was that neither could say shit as they both were paying 0 attention. True comedy.

-chris

The stars were aligned for me to meet him again…

Celtics judging from your posts espescially when you call out young kids and demand to see naked pictures og big black men I’m not the only one who needs to grow up…and for the record I don’t think the guy accidentally bumped into me I think he told himself he is too important to respect anyone…that’s how I took it and would do it again it felt good damn good.

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:
I had taken my wife and two preteen girls [/quote]

You poor bastard, I take back any bad thing I may have said to you ever. lol

That house must be challenge to live in.

Not saying you have a bad life or family, I just know a couple of guys with teenage daughters…[/quote]

A real challenge is being the only woman in a house full of men. The place stinks of testosterone and the toilet seat is always up.

[quote]celtics2022 wrote:
So some random guy accidentally bumped into you and then you saw him again and ran at him when he wasn’t looking and knocked him to the ground?

You need to grow the fuck up.

You just committed assault by the way.[/quote]

If you want to get technical, it’s battery.

When I have a group of people walking abreast coming toward me, I casually tuck my hair behind my ear so they have the choice of narrowing their group or looking like douches running into a girl’s elbow.

[quote]pushmepullme wrote:

[quote]celtics2022 wrote:
So some random guy accidentally bumped into you and then you saw him again and ran at him when he wasn’t looking and knocked him to the ground?

You need to grow the fuck up.

You just committed assault by the way.[/quote]

If you want to get technical, it’s battery.[/quote]

I was going to tell him the same thing, and then call him a douchebag. You complete me.

Battery…assault…ill call it just desserts

I like what you did. That shit can piss me off and all kinds of thoughts race through my head when someone pulls that shit.

Video next time.

I used to think people pick on the Celtics girl…mistaken.

[quote]countingbeans wrote:

[quote]Testy1 wrote:
I had taken my wife and two preteen girls [/quote]

You poor bastard, I take back any bad thing I may have said to you ever. lol

That house must be challenge to live in.

Not saying you have a bad life or family, I just know a couple of guys with teenage daughters…[/quote]

Thanks Beans, you’re not the douche I pegged you for at first either. Worst part is I have to take my dog in to get his balls snipped soon.