I would think that a lot of the satisfaction derived from fucking a pastry would be the satisfaction of smashing my dong through it. It seems like a pop tart would be more inclined to snap in half when donged, so I’m thinking like a Danish would be a good choice.
Soft enough to dong through, but firm enough for repeated donging.
I would think so too, but they’re like the Sasha Grey of breakfast pastries.
To each their own though. I like my donuts same as my women- covered in white powder and busted in half.
I would recommend against custard filled varieties for this purpose.
I’d also like to put forward the good old danish as an option. I think you could even spin it and have it fly off the end of the old fella, at the strippers - teppanyaki style.
Bonus points for getting Danish strippers.
I’m a fan of squirters… jelly-filled it is.
I can’t tell if this is a joke about glazing or a more obvious punchline.
… and that was how I stopped eating donuts.
Little bit of both.
Should I be proud or ashamed that I had to google Sasha Grey? Either way, I am going to be losing sleep over it.
I dunno. I can’t really judge since she’s the first thing I thought of when the subject of breakfast foods came up.
I’d hate to think of what would happen if I did a rorshach/ free association test.
I have almost no familiarity with Italian, I only speak English, French and Spanish. My French accent is terrible, but I like a lot of French literature, so I read it more than I actually get to speak it where I live. Spanish, on the other hand… I live in Texas, and half of my employees speak Spanish, so I get to hear/speak it all the time. So I suppose Spanish would be our common ground, lol.
F*ck me, that song is gonna be stuck in my head the rest of the day.
There you go
This as well, it’s in English but no r so you should be happy 
https://drive.google.com/open?id=1A6dRwZSwRnxODwcG3lqmRwRiP6BwvZNH
Alright everybody needs to chill the fuck out my finger is honestly getting tired from clicking the like button too often
What’s that saying? Don’t throw stones if you live in a house made of Enrique Iglesias covers?
Of all the pastries to bang, how come no one has mentioned Canolies?
I personally don’t have the anatomy parts to try it, but come on. It’s already pre-shaped to be easy access to?
Woah! No one is talking about banging pastries. That would be weird. This is just harmless pastries on the schlong to spice things up.
WTF is going on in here. The lunatics running the asylum.
When this thread popped up the other day I just gave it an eye roll, and moved on. What was I thinking? Pop tarts, dicks, strippers, Orchata, cociane, other pastries. Shit! I can’t believe I missed all of this!
