I hesitate to start this topic, since I think this is something that a lot of people are incapable of discussing rationally. But on the other hand, this is so completely out of hand and out of balance with so many other things in society, I need to understand. To be clear, I have no interest in using this word and have never used it. And I don’t have much respect for people who do. But the same is true of lots of words and phrases.
So explain to me how the only unforgivable sin that no one will defend you for in western society seems to be using a word that some people don’t like. As we have seen, you can literally go through the streets of the suburbs of Israel, brutally rape, torture, and decapitate women and children and you’ll still find huge groups of people in the US that will defend you. You can riot and burn cities, murder police, and loot. And someone will claim that you probably have good reason and we need to understand you better. But we draw the line at the use of a word. And no matter what history, meaning, or connotations that word has, it’s still just a word. And to be clear, people have been cancelled and had their lives ruined for uttering the word in an academic discussion of the word, not even using it as an insult or pejorative. It’s literally the uttering of the syllables that is condemned. Like saying Voldemort.
And I get that for the most part this is just because not saying the word is not any sort of inconvenience and it’s a stupid hill to die on. But also, I need to understand why this is the hill that some people think is so necessary to attack.
Its like saying no to drugs. Everybody says that they say no to drugs but use them anyways.
You just have to be better friends before they break out the goodies.
I call it “The N Word” barrier. They won’t say it around you until you’re inside the N word boundary of trust.
Its how we maintain our dignity, sense of normalcy and decency.
Without these constructs you’d have upper middle class housewives chit chatting about leather, coke, and hardcore anal in the organic food aisle at Fresh Thyme.
I learned the other day from a viral (both love and hate the term lol) exchange between Steve Smith Sr. (ex NFL WR and certified badass/psycho) and Jerry Jeudy (current NFL WR and overrated softie poser) that “Ninja” is tossed out in public as a code word for the N word.
I am happy to talk about leather, coke, and hardcore anal pretty much anywhere (but not with you guys), but the “N word” is different to me. I’ve been informed that it’s hurtful to a great many people, so I keep that shit out my mouth. My husband brings some pretty crude men around for men stuff, e.g. annual golf tournament, annual gun season camping and shooting weekend. It’s a thing I’ve only heard once by our group of goons in the ten years I’ve had them, but I will note it’s offensive if necessary. They’re respectful when stuff comes up. It’s not because it’s a dirty word, it’s because it’s a word that has so many attachments to humiliation and degradation of every possible sort.
What I don’t understand is why we have to keep changing words that should not be offensive, but which rather simply describe something, such as changing deaf to hearing impaired or mentally retarded to developmentally disabled. Those words should be neutral, so wtf? But there it is.
yes, it’s for when you are in mixed company or a setting where cuss words don’t fly. I have been greeted more than once with a “my ninja” as an inside joke.
See also Thug. That’s some other people’s version of the same word to be uttered in mixed company or in a setting like on the news where what you really want to say may not fly.
Ok, now do the F word (this word was equally popular in the same music with multiple ninjas, until it wasn’t) and the other word that is so heinous (never said this word ever) I dare not even allude to it more than I already have.
The thing that bothers me is the idea that it is the ugliest and most vile word in the English language. It is not. It is vile and ugly but that word shares those qualities with every racial/ethnic slur for every race or ethnicity. Dehumanizing is dehumanizing regardless of what group the particular human belongs to.
And the whole “we use that word in order to take away its power” line is BS. Not only does it still cause some people to lose their minds when they hear a non black person use it, regardless of context, but does anyone think the woke would want to de-weaponize a word by making it meaningless?
I was at a Wu-Tang Clan concert a couple of weeks ago and they jokingly told the white audience members to say ninja while they sang along to a certain song.
They also really like Asian stuff so it made sense either way.
We don’t say “heaven forfend” any longer, nor do we exclaim “God’s teeth!” A hobbledehoy used to be used to describe a disreputable or clumsy youth. We don’t, for that matter, much use the term “disreputable” anymore, though once upon a time it was a huge insult, particularly for women…
They’re just words. They mean what we agree they mean. So if the N word does more harm than good, let’s just drop it, like all the other words we don’t need.
I don’t avoid “bad words” unless I perceive in them potential harm. Then, why would I? I have so much agency in my life, and this is such an unimportant exercise of it.
I don’t know anything about a Voldemort, but I know a little bit about history.
“Nigger” is a word that can and should be used in the correct context. If you are using it to insult someone, you should be ready to get a bad reaction. Same as any other insult.
When we are discussing things like history or quoting someone I don’t see how it does anyone any good to substitute it with “The N-word” or “N^^^^R.
People should read the full word and hear it spoken, so they might better understand what it actually meant. I’m of Polish heritage and I do not ever want to see the word “untermensch” reduced to “the U-word”.
It is an insult to everyone who suffered under the label when we sanitize something that should be understood as shameful. Words like “nigger” and “untermensch” should make people a little uncomfortable when they read it or hear it spoken.
I don’t have a problem with society deeming certain words despicable. Although words only have power when you give it to them. Still, my problem is the “rules for thee but not for me” aspect. The word is used in a certain genre of music freely, even today by grungier and less pop style music. Also, I have personally heard it used by the group it’s supposed to disenfranchise. Admittedly less so often today than say even 5-10 years ago.
Really? I’m young-ish but I feel like it’s still used very often. And now by lots of different groups - lots of Latinos (sort of depends on who - probably not a Mexican farmer but maybe a Puerto Rican city dweller), even sometimes Native Americans and Southeast Asians. It’s usually just younger people though. I’m not hearing 50 year-old Laotians call each other n*gga, haha.
I even saw a black rapper telling a group of rappers from the Balkans they could say it, since they’d experienced ethnic cleansing. I doubt he speaks for the whole black population but it seems like many these days think as long as you come from some sort of an impoverished community, you can use the word. I used to work with a group of three guys - two black, one white, and the white guy freely said it around them. I was surprised when I heard it but based on whatever their history was, they didn’t mind.
I also see a lot of young (white) country kids call each other n*gga, or gang-affiliated nicknames (blood, cuh, etc) but I think they just listen to too much rap. They might need @twojarslave to teach them which slurs are ethnically appropriate for them, haha.
The age difference if probably it. I live in a fairly affluent rural area. The only time I hear it now is by teens playing basketball at the local recreation park. I go there to let my kids play and walk the track for some LISS exercise.
me too.