There’s a notable thing you said there. “The happiest guy”. Fair enough. For him though. Did he ever go into detail about how either of the two women felt? Would he even have had the ability to step outside of himself and recall the attributes and characteristics of either women to know? Doesn’t matter if they ever knew about the other, but how they felt. How he made them feel.
The guy could’ve been happier than a fly on shit, but what about the others? I don’t find that to be a win. Just selfishness. His happiness is only coming from him allowing himself to indulge in that type of behavior. When he could’ve easily taken a better and much healthier route not just for his own benefit but for his wife, and for the other woman.
Again, I’m not going to berate you. Or say anything to make you feel less than, because you aren’t. But I don’t think you fully grasp what it means to step outside of yourself not just In marriage, but in life as well. Marriage isn’t hard. We make it hard. It all starts when both individuals accept and learn how to go in and out of understanding what it means to be unified but separate individuals.
Same concepts apply to friendships. Albeit less of a unified sense, but there’s still that element of unity within a friendship.
I get that you’re a very outspoken person, but there’s parts to having that characteristic that you could stand to reign in, relationship wise.
As with all of us. There’s always something about ourselves that we can deny for the sake of others around us, in order for us to come together.
Relationships, and marriage aren’t complicated. You yourself have the power to be in a fulfilling one. What’s truly complicated is looking at yourself, your way of thinking, and picking it apart to it’s essence, In order to see what you can work on within yourself, and strengthening the good you find. In turn, it’s much more rewarding when you find someone who has done the same, or continues daily to do the same. Knowing if they have, isn’t difficult all that much either, it just seeps out of them. That’s not to say they’re perfect, but that they’re trying.
I know you’ve probably heard this ad nauseam, but I do genuinely mean what I’m saying.