[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
I’m 20 as well. The problem here is you’re choosing to be weak because your willpower is weak. Your ignorance is irrelevant. You’re making a shit decision. You know what’s waiting, but you leap for it like a crackhead. Just stop. Life isn’t all about the canopy. Grow some roots.
[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
Take it from someone who made the mistake on more than one occasion - it really is better to refrain from contact at least until you are completely over the person. What do you hope to get from it - her taking you back? NOTHING GOOD EVER COMES OF IT. Otherwise - do you remember the pain you felt just after she dumped you? - Those horrible feelings will just keep returning if you contact her again.
I see you are also still at the point where you blame yourself for everything. Damn, she really did a number on you, didn’t she? She probably listed a bunch of things you did wrong to justify her dumping you, didn’t she? No breakup is ever just one person’s fault and that was an asshole move on her part. You need blame her a bit too, if only for doing that to you, and to get to the point where you are at least a bit angry at her for a while.
[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
I’m 20 as well. The problem here is you’re choosing to be weak because your willpower is weak. Your ignorance is irrelevant. You’re making a shit decision. You know what’s waiting, but you leap for it like a crackhead. Just stop. Life isn’t all about the canopy. Grow some roots.[/quote]
[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
I’m 20 as well. The problem here is you’re choosing to be weak because your willpower is weak. Your ignorance is irrelevant. You’re making a shit decision. You know what’s waiting, but you leap for it like a crackhead. Just stop. Life isn’t all about the canopy. Grow some roots.[/quote]
I just wandered into this thread out of boredom, and while this is great advice I think this kid is too stupid to listen and probably needs to bang his head into the wall a few more times before he has a moment of clarity.
Unlike the rest of you, I was happy for him when he sent that pathetic text because I figured there was no way after that she would attempt to get back together with him. Unfortunately she sent him this “hey” and now he’s in total relapse.
Yall have given him good advice, and I’m sure we all wish him well. I hope he continues to update this thread.
[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
I’m 20 as well. The problem here is you’re choosing to be weak because your willpower is weak. Your ignorance is irrelevant. You’re making a shit decision. You know what’s waiting, but you leap for it like a crackhead. Just stop. Life isn’t all about the canopy. Grow some roots.[/quote]
I just wandered into this thread out of boredom, and while this is great advice I think this kid is too stupid to listen and probably needs to bang his head into the wall a few more times before he has a moment of clarity.
Unlike the rest of you, I was happy for him when he sent that pathetic text because I figured there was no way after that she would attempt to get back together with him. Unfortunately she sent him this “hey” and now he’s in total relapse.
Yall have given him good advice, and I’m sure we all wish him well. I hope he continues to update this thread.[/quote]
Yeah he’ll learn either way. It’s just a matter of how long and how much pain he’s willing to endure before that.
[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
I’m 20 as well. The problem here is you’re choosing to be weak because your willpower is weak. Your ignorance is irrelevant. You’re making a shit decision. You know what’s waiting, but you leap for it like a crackhead. Just stop. Life isn’t all about the canopy. Grow some roots.[/quote]
I just wandered into this thread out of boredom, and while this is great advice I think this kid is too stupid to listen and probably needs to bang his head into the wall a few more times before he has a moment of clarity.
Unlike the rest of you, I was happy for him when he sent that pathetic text because I figured there was no way after that she would attempt to get back together with him. Unfortunately she sent him this “hey” and now he’s in total relapse.
Yall have given him good advice, and I’m sure we all wish him well. I hope he continues to update this thread.[/quote]
Here’s the deal I wouldn’t consider myself stupid. A stupid person wouldn’t be able to get straight A’s in Bio, chem, physics etc. However I do agree I am an idiot when it comes to a situation like this. I just keep imagining myself never finding the right girl and thinking what would have happened if I had replied. I don’t have any friends at the moment because I invested so much of my time into her so the advice on this forum is all i’ve got. I’m sure in the future i’ll look back at this thread and just cringe at my stupidity but don’t we all?
[quote]StevenF wrote:
you are being a huge pussy. [/quote]
How so? [/quote]
You have her dick in you.[/quote]
Look i’m only 20 and ignorant as fuk. I was with this girl for three years. This was my first serious break up, instead of locking myself in my house and quitting on life i’m enrolled in school and have a decent job. I’m also lifting weights again even with all the injuries. When I say i’m ignorant I truly do mean it, I didn’t even know that after break ups you cut all contact. Anyways rant over haha[/quote]
I’m 20 as well. The problem here is you’re choosing to be weak because your willpower is weak. Your ignorance is irrelevant. You’re making a shit decision. You know what’s waiting, but you leap for it like a crackhead. Just stop. Life isn’t all about the canopy. Grow some roots.[/quote]
I just wandered into this thread out of boredom, and while this is great advice I think this kid is too stupid to listen and probably needs to bang his head into the wall a few more times before he has a moment of clarity.
Unlike the rest of you, I was happy for him when he sent that pathetic text because I figured there was no way after that she would attempt to get back together with him. Unfortunately she sent him this “hey” and now he’s in total relapse.
Yall have given him good advice, and I’m sure we all wish him well. I hope he continues to update this thread.[/quote]
Here’s the deal I wouldn’t consider myself stupid. A stupid person wouldn’t be able to get straight A’s in Bio, chem, physics etc. However I do agree I am an idiot when it comes to a situation like this. I just keep imagining myself never finding the right girl and thinking what would have happened if I had replied. I don’t have any friends at the moment because I invested so much of my time into her so the advice on this forum is all i’ve got. I’m sure in the future i’ll look back at this thread and just cringe at my stupidity but don’t we all?
[/quote]
Scarcity mindset and mental masturbation through and through.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
I know i’m going to get flamed for this but it’s kind of important. She still owes me $500 for paying her rent a month before we broke up.[/quote]
I have about $1350 that I will never get back. Look at it as paying for a course.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
I know i’m going to get flamed for this but it’s kind of important. She still owes me $500 for paying her rent a month before we broke up.[/quote]
I have about $1350 that I will never get back. Look at it as paying for a course.[/quote]
She agreed to pay me in the first week of January. Will have to wait and see if that actually happens.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Ex just texted me out of no where with a simple “hey”. I went from feeling like the happiest man on earth to feeling like the angriest. After all of that no contact all she says is “hey”. Should I even bother replying?
[/quote]
No reply. Not because “hey” is such a terrible thing. But rather, because you’ll screw up your head.
[/quote]
Mind elaborating a bit more? Knowing me i’d probably end up texting back it’d be nice if you’d talk me out of it. Just as before with the emails I regret sending.
[/quote]
You have said things that demonstrate not just emotional attachment, but real and hazardous cognitive dissonance with regards to this girl. i.e.: obtained frivolous restraining order, and was “wife material”. You are still in emotional pain and turmoil, even if at the moment you are not consciously aware of it because of anger or whatever. Engaging will steer you toward thinking fond thoughts about her; pining more for her; etc.
Danger! Danger! Danger! Abort! Abort! Abort!
Also: have you shown your father or mother the two items I pointed out, and requested that beating yet?
[/quote]
Let me play devil advocate. She never
Did anything wrong
[/quote]
Getting an emergency protective order against you for no good reason was very wrong.
She did not have a good reason to hit you with a protective order.
Even if she did have reasons to leave you: that does not mean you owe it to her to be her friend at the cost of screwing up your head; and it certainly does not mean it would do any good to try to get her back.
Yes. The part about the frivolous restraining order; and the part about how she was “wife material”.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Ex just texted me out of no where with a simple “hey”. I went from feeling like the happiest man on earth to feeling like the angriest. After all of that no contact all she says is “hey”. Should I even bother replying?
[/quote]
No reply. Not because “hey” is such a terrible thing. But rather, because you’ll screw up your head.
[/quote]
Mind elaborating a bit more? Knowing me i’d probably end up texting back it’d be nice if you’d talk me out of it. Just as before with the emails I regret sending.
[/quote]
You have said things that demonstrate not just emotional attachment, but real and hazardous cognitive dissonance with regards to this girl. i.e.: obtained frivolous restraining order, and was “wife material”. You are still in emotional pain and turmoil, even if at the moment you are not consciously aware of it because of anger or whatever. Engaging will steer you toward thinking fond thoughts about her; pining more for her; etc.
Danger! Danger! Danger! Abort! Abort! Abort!
Also: have you shown your father or mother the two items I pointed out, and requested that beating yet?
[/quote]
Let me play devil advocate. She never
Did anything wrong
[/quote]
Getting an emergency protective order against you for no good reason was very wrong.
She did not have a good reason to hit you with a protective order.
Even if she did have reasons to leave you: that does not mean you owe it to her to be her friend at the cost of screwing up your head; and it certainly does not mean it would do any good to try to get her back.
Yes. The part about the frivolous restraining order; and the part about how she was “wife material”.[/quote]
The restraining order was frivolous meaning her life was never at risk. However I did constanty contact her EVERY day even thougj she made it clear she didn’t want to communicate. I went back and looked at some of those messges and cringed very hard. One message that I sent…“I don’t want to live on this planet without you and you can make this pain go away”.She probably took it as me trying to manipulate her into getting back together by threatning suicide. (FYI I was never suicidal)
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Here’s the deal I wouldn’t consider myself stupid. A stupid person wouldn’t be able to get straight A’s in Bio, chem, physics etc. However I do agree I am an idiot when it comes to a situation like this. I just keep imagining myself never finding the right girl and thinking what would have happened if I had replied. I don’t have any friends at the moment because I invested so much of my time into her so the advice on this forum is all i’ve got. I’m sure in the future i’ll look back at this thread and just cringe at my stupidity but don’t we all?
[/quote]
One can be smart in many aspects of life, and very stupid in others. You’ve been getting good advice from the beggining of this thread, which has been going on a while. Yet you have sent her at least one pathetic text, after everyone’s been telling you to move on. You were like “yeah that was stupid! I wish I hadn’t done that!” And then she tries to initiate contact and you really wanted to respond because you still want to get back with her, even though everyone’s telling you that’s an awful idea.
Hence too stupid to listen. I’m not trying to be mean. I wouldn’t post here, and I’m sure others wouldn’t be posting here if we hadn’t been in similar situations ourselves and weren’t trying to help. I wish you well. But I think the only way you’re going to learn is to keep beating your head against this wall until reality sinks in.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Ex just texted me out of no where with a simple “hey”. I went from feeling like the happiest man on earth to feeling like the angriest. After all of that no contact all she says is “hey”. Should I even bother replying?
[/quote]
No reply. Not because “hey” is such a terrible thing. But rather, because you’ll screw up your head.
[/quote]
Mind elaborating a bit more? Knowing me i’d probably end up texting back it’d be nice if you’d talk me out of it. Just as before with the emails I regret sending.
[/quote]
You have said things that demonstrate not just emotional attachment, but real and hazardous cognitive dissonance with regards to this girl. i.e.: obtained frivolous restraining order, and was “wife material”. You are still in emotional pain and turmoil, even if at the moment you are not consciously aware of it because of anger or whatever. Engaging will steer you toward thinking fond thoughts about her; pining more for her; etc.
Danger! Danger! Danger! Abort! Abort! Abort!
Also: have you shown your father or mother the two items I pointed out, and requested that beating yet?
[/quote]
Let me play devil advocate. She never
Did anything wrong
[/quote]
Getting an emergency protective order against you for no good reason was very wrong.
She did not have a good reason to hit you with a protective order.
Even if she did have reasons to leave you: that does not mean you owe it to her to be her friend at the cost of screwing up your head; and it certainly does not mean it would do any good to try to get her back.
Yes. The part about the frivolous restraining order; and the part about how she was “wife material”.[/quote]
The restraining order was frivolous meaning her life was never at risk. However I did constanty contact her EVERY day even thougj she made it clear she didn’t want to communicate. I went back and looked at some of those messges and cringed very hard. One message that I sent…“I don’t want to live on this planet without you and you can make this pain go away”.She probably took it as me trying to manipulate her into getting back together by threatning suicide. (FYI I was never suicidal)
[/quote]
The restraining order was not frivolous. If a girl receives that type of text she should get a restraining order. You may know you would never hurt her but she doesn’t know you would never hurt her nd the smart thing to do is be safe.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Ex just texted me out of no where with a simple “hey”. I went from feeling like the happiest man on earth to feeling like the angriest. After all of that no contact all she says is “hey”. Should I even bother replying?
[/quote]
No reply. Not because “hey” is such a terrible thing. But rather, because you’ll screw up your head.
[/quote]
Mind elaborating a bit more? Knowing me i’d probably end up texting back it’d be nice if you’d talk me out of it. Just as before with the emails I regret sending.
[/quote]
You have said things that demonstrate not just emotional attachment, but real and hazardous cognitive dissonance with regards to this girl. i.e.: obtained frivolous restraining order, and was “wife material”. You are still in emotional pain and turmoil, even if at the moment you are not consciously aware of it because of anger or whatever. Engaging will steer you toward thinking fond thoughts about her; pining more for her; etc.
Danger! Danger! Danger! Abort! Abort! Abort!
Also: have you shown your father or mother the two items I pointed out, and requested that beating yet?
[/quote]
Let me play devil advocate. She never
Did anything wrong
[/quote]
Getting an emergency protective order against you for no good reason was very wrong.
She did not have a good reason to hit you with a protective order.
Even if she did have reasons to leave you: that does not mean you owe it to her to be her friend at the cost of screwing up your head; and it certainly does not mean it would do any good to try to get her back.
Yes. The part about the frivolous restraining order; and the part about how she was “wife material”.[/quote]
The restraining order was frivolous meaning her life was never at risk. However I did constanty contact her EVERY day even thougj she made it clear she didn’t want to communicate. I went back and looked at some of those messges and cringed very hard. One message that I sent…“I don’t want to live on this planet without you and you can make this pain go away”.She probably took it as me trying to manipulate her into getting back together by threatning suicide. (FYI I was never suicidal)
[/quote]
The restraining order was not frivolous. If a girl receives that type of text she should get a restraining order. You may know you would never hurt her but she doesn’t know you would never hurt her nd the smart thing to do is be safe.[/quote]
Restraining orders aren’t a joke. If it was justifiable and upheld I could have possible been screwed for life (background checks) . In the three years I was with her I never showed any signs of aggression or abuse. She just wanted to take the easy way out. Before she cut contact I convinced her to get back together. Then she cut contact all of a sudden. She jus acted like coward who didn’t want to face her feelings head on.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Restraining orders aren’t a joke.
[/quote]
Neither is saying “I don’t want you contacting me” but you clearly didn’t take that seriously.
You’ve heard of the phrase “the pot calling the kettle black”, no?
Go to the rational male and read ALL of “the best of year one” and find “the book of pook” online (it’s in a PDF format) and read all of that shit. I’d have killed to have some of that info when I was your age. You need it.
[quote]Justliftbrah wrote:
Ex just texted me out of no where with a simple “hey”. I went from feeling like the happiest man on earth to feeling like the angriest. After all of that no contact all she says is “hey”. Should I even bother replying?
[/quote]
No reply. Not because “hey” is such a terrible thing. But rather, because you’ll screw up your head.
[/quote]
Mind elaborating a bit more? Knowing me i’d probably end up texting back it’d be nice if you’d talk me out of it. Just as before with the emails I regret sending.
[/quote]
You have said things that demonstrate not just emotional attachment, but real and hazardous cognitive dissonance with regards to this girl. i.e.: obtained frivolous restraining order, and was “wife material”. You are still in emotional pain and turmoil, even if at the moment you are not consciously aware of it because of anger or whatever. Engaging will steer you toward thinking fond thoughts about her; pining more for her; etc.
Danger! Danger! Danger! Abort! Abort! Abort!
Also: have you shown your father or mother the two items I pointed out, and requested that beating yet?
[/quote]
Let me play devil advocate. She never
Did anything wrong
[/quote]
Getting an emergency protective order against you for no good reason was very wrong.
She did not have a good reason to hit you with a protective order.
Even if she did have reasons to leave you: that does not mean you owe it to her to be her friend at the cost of screwing up your head; and it certainly does not mean it would do any good to try to get her back.
Yes. The part about the frivolous restraining order; and the part about how she was “wife material”.
[/quote]
The restraining order was frivolous meaning her life was never at risk. However I did constanty contact her EVERY day even thougj she made it clear she didn’t want to communicate. I went back and looked at some of those messges and cringed very hard. One message that I sent…“I don’t want to live on this planet without you and you can make this pain go away”.She probably took it as me trying to manipulate her into getting back together by threatning suicide. (FYI I was never suicidal)
[/quote]
That throws an entirely different light on the restraining order. (But still no good to screw up your head by responding to her “hey”.)
[quote]rrjc5488 wrote:
And since I’m sure Orion’s reading this thread, I’d like to thank him for recommending the book of pook.
So, uhh, you know. Thanks. [/quote]
You know why I do this, right?
When I was your or OPs age none of this was around.
Since I and men my age were the avant guarde, at least in my country we experienced what an avant guarde is designated to experience, we got slaughtered.
Now, I will not get those years back, or the missed opportunities, or the one or two women I actually could and would have married in good conscience as fucked up as the deal is, but it was my generation, with the help of the rise of the internet who compared notes and found out that, across continents, our experiences were the same.
If I can unplug a few guys who then go on to life their lives on their own terms I still wont get any of it back, but it will have made sense and served some purpose.