[quote]Mr. Walkway wrote:
I hope this helps… it’s taken from a different site obvi
I’m not claiming to be anything that I’m not. But I know girls and women. I’ve had a few relationships lasting a couple years each. One of which ended a month ago… These were hand picked successively as the best in whatever ways I imagined at the time. I mostly tried to avoid relationships more and more as I got older. You know the story, you find somebody amazing who you really click with, above and beyond the rest. I have my own faults, but nothing like I’ve been subjected to.
I have befriended and bedded maybe 100 or more. I work with 40+ girls and women on any given day/night and have for years. I meet more every day. In a bigger city I see and hear a lot of my friends experiences besides my own. Plus my own family and old friends and their relationships.
In 2013 I don’t see the point. Selfish, empty, negative, emotional, lazy, self-entitled, uninspired, cruel, insatiable, easily bored, gullible, impressionable, unfaithful, immoral to the core. The whole fucking lot. From 18-menopause its all the same. Some grow up slightly over time. Some are better as they’re younger and develop worse and worse habits along the way.
An individual is obviously different than the next but mostly its all the same shit. I’m not saying men are perfect or anything but I know quite a few good guys. And I don’t know a single truly good woman.
Truly good… out of all of them? Definitely zero. They all share the above characteristics. Not all at once and some worse than others. But none are to be trusted with, say, my life or even property. I’m a successful, good-looking, intelligent, athletic guy. I care deeply about those i love and I make a lot of sacrifices for those close to me and balanced dedication becomes who I am and what i do. I help people flourish as their own person while a relationship blossoms. Truth be told if you want a woman around, to truthfully stay around, they need to be treated poorly. I’m not into that.
This past relationship was the worst. We started out as really good friends. Started dating, went through thick and thin together, bettered each other and ourselves, accomplished goals, had a lot of fun, really truly loved each other, and dreamed of the future and fully appreciated every waking day.
Right around the time of her birthday last month, she left me for a fucking pizza boy that she knew for a couple weeks. Im not lying… I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried. She went from an angel to the devil that needs to be pushed back into the depths of hell. Doesn’t care what she did, what she’s going to do. No apology, no time lapse between me and him. Just a totally and completely different person at the flip of a switch and there were no warning signs at all.
Same old shit, different face. Just completely reliably standard crazy shit. I don’t know what her explanation will be and I won’t be around to hear it. Its so common and normal, how could I possibly care?
I contact old girlfriends, friends, and meet girls I don’t know yet. I need sex obviously, especially in this lonely state. We can be civil, hang out, fuck, carry on convos. Then its time for them to go. Half of them probably just have the same needs as me and even head out in their own when its time.
I sit here alone with my dog on nights like this, taking a break after blasting through my hobbies for a while, training hard, getting a lot done at work, just getting my shit together, and I feel the coldest loneliness that I can remember. Depressing shit, really.
I do not want to be like 90%+ of married men. So miserable, broken, defeated, used and abused. Not for me. Having a girlfriend is the mild equivelant… where it slowly breaks down just the same and becomes just a huge waste of time, energy, happiness and sanity.
But now approaching 30, I can’t always pull 18-21s anymore and even if I do get regular good random sex there are the obvious std scares, which I have been through. I just don’t enjoy this as much as when I was just a couple years younger. I need to have sex regularly, we all do.
What’s the point? What’s a good goal? I see what marriage is and what it does. No fucking thank you. I occasionally slip up and start thinking about any current long time gf that way and I realize how it would just be miserable. Realizing this as I’m happy in the moment, mind you.
I’m really stuck here. In my state we are in our 7th month of winter. Everybody is stir crazy, and as much as I want to meet new girls, im starting to find less and less quality so its fewer and farther between. I can’t pull 8 girls in 7 nights anymore lol
I immerse myself in my hobbies, pursuits, and work. I talk to and hang with my friends as much as possible. My dog is always in my lap.
I’m still lonely as hell, completely isolated with the knowledge that I have. Its hard to know what to want at this point.
Let me also say that i love time to myself. I read a lot and I have a lot of hobbies. I have often thought about living in a cabin in the woods an hr away. That’s how much I enjoy my “me” time. But some of my cabin daydreams involve my head splattered on the wall, purely because of the extreme isolation.
Bitches… can’t live w em, truly can’t live without them. Hard not knowing what to do. I see other s currently happily in love. And although it most likely wont last and the pain will be monument Al to the good things they felt, I still want that, sometimes
Edit: I was going to edit the jumping around of my thought processes and typos. Then I thought, fuck it. This is a counseling forum. Nothing to hide [/quote]
For fucks sake, I’m glad I’m not a chick because so many guys seem to have this type of negative attitude toward women. I think because they hurt you you demonize them as a coping strategy.
The truth is women are really just about like guys. Some are good, some are bad, many are total gems. Another truth is most coupes who get married stay married. The divorce statistics are skewed by people who are serial divorcees. A few people throw the numbers out of whack.