My rich uncle told me to buy a town house because it’s easier to pay off. I’m most likely going to listen to him. I also don’t want my first house to be huge cause I’ll probably have to pay a huge mortgage. He also advised renting out property you paid off.
Well if you have your female partner not cooking and doing house work then it may be expensive. The office I work at I am one of the few people cooking. Keep in mind we are a female dominated office. What I pay for a week for food, my female colleagues spend for lunch. Cause they are too indipendent to cook.
Rising children is not that expensive. We have few single moms doing well with average wages while paying rent. I was rised without diapers as they were not available during communism here. I bet you you can rise your babies without them as well.
As the poster above mentioned. We have become very selfish both man and woman and want luxorious items and good food and free time and travel. And we would not sacrifise it to rise children.
I for example can purchase a Tesla Model 3, alhough I am comming from a poor country. But I rather not pay 700 usd per month for 6 years, but purchase land for these money. Land that some day my children will have and may have a living. Meanwhile I am driving an Audi A6 from 1996. I really want the Tesla, but it is a bad investmen and a luxury I do not really need.
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You don’t need various commodities in order to raise a child, but is raising a child in poverty optimal? Not a chance in hell
I don’t think you have any idea how expensive it is to pay rent in Australia.
Let’s say you have an average income here. 55k/yr taxed at 32.5% (that’s the tax rate here). So you’ve now got 37,125$/year.
Rent is going to set you back around 500$/week because there’s not a chance you’ll be able to afford to buy property. That’s 26,000$/year … The cost of raising a child is 8,800/year in Aus. Now you’re already at 34,800. Good luck raising a child as a single parent here. Let’s take the 8,800$ out of the equation though. For Sydney “Family of four estimated monthly costs are 5,239A$ without rent”… So that’s an extra 62868$ per year on top of rent. Two average salaries post tax can’t pay that + rent.
But men and women are just selfish… No, having a child young in Australia is LITERALLY unaffordable in your early to mid twenties. Say hello to lifelong debt, goodbye to ever going to college or trade school… And if you do have a kid young, chances are you won’t go to college or trade school and your salary will be below the median. Parents don’t pay college/trade school tuition in Aus
As I’ve specified, it’s absolutely horrendous; but that’s the way things are here. Having a kid isn’t as simple as changing diapers and supervising them. You need to be able to provide for them. If you literally can’t afford that, then you shouldn’t be having kids.
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Anywhere I’d consider desirable to live, nah.
This is where having a wife with her shit together and a good income is important. Money can’t buy happiness but it sure makes happiness easier to achieve. I’m stoked my wife outearns me- takes the pressure off providing and allows me to prioritize my kid and wife instead of career… And similarly, me being a good earner allows her to prioritize our kid and me over her career. I want a good teammate in life… Not a teammate I have to carry or a proverbial water boy.
Idk how folks could put up with a dull, simple wife, content with just homemaking. I certainly couldnt. But to each their own.
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I know some amazing people who are content with this, not to say that this is what a woman NEEDS to do if she doesn’t want to; but there’s nothing wrong with it whatsoever.
Do you consider California desirable to live?
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Parts of it for sure. Lots of parts not so much.
I’m big on location, location, location.
Also, depends on what you think is “big”.
But that’s kinda the point. A starter home isn’t supposed to be your dream home. Buy what you can afford, where you can afford it and continue working hard to be able to buy where you do want to live eventually.
Townhomes come with HOAs and big special assessments. Be careful. They also do not appreciate as much as a house. They are easier to rent out from a logistics standpoint though.
FYI, with rates this low you be be a fool to put anymore than 20% down, and pay more than the minimum mortgage payment. You shouldn’t have your townhome paid off for 30 yrs. My mortgage rate is literally less than 20% of what my parents paid on their first mortgage…
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It’s similar in most developed countries on our side of the world and some major cities in developing nations with PPP and after-tax income accounted for. HK got the worst of it because of China speculators. Dudes hated them so much they called them “locusts”. A house like the one you posted in the pic would cost around 8 million USD there (told y’all in a previous post you’d be fucking mindblown if you looked at HK’s property prices).
A fucking certificate of entitlement for a car can cost more than the fucking car over here. $5,000 second hand cars in the US? Forget it lol. The cheapest 2nd hand car is at least 20K USD and that’s still cheaper than the fucking COE. The COE for a motorcycle is around 7K USD LMFAO. Don’t get me started on gas prices…
10 years ago someone recommended me an old school type villa in a 2nd tier city in China. It was going for less than 100K USD. It was a fucking no-brainer but I couldn’t afford it since I had already blown my load on other shit in the country and the down payment for a non-citizen suddenly went up to 50% for a 3rd property and beyond even if his/her spouse was a citizen because of so much speculation (Actually, IIRC this applied to all citizens that’s why there are so many marriage and divorce scams). Today it’s worth over 1 million USD lol. The median monthly household salary in that city is still around 1-1.5K USD.
SAD!
EDIT:
But, to be fair, we (including Australia) aren’t getting the ridiculous prices people in the US pay for medical bills.
Unless in the US you have employment that includes medical insurance.
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Costs like 100-110$ for me to fill up my car. That gets me like 400 kilometres…
I don’t think the two need to go together. I know plenty of women who became stay-at-home moms, and dull and simple do not begin to describe these people. I also know plenty of women who went to college, got decent jobs, and when their men bring them around, dull and simple come to mind.
I think it’s important to make that distinction. People seem to have the idea that all homemakers are just subservient women with not much going for them. I don’t think deciding to make the raising of children a #1 priority should be considered a negative thing.
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And raising our kids isn’t the #1 priority of my wife and I?
I know what you mean, I just think it’s usually a cop out for someone who doesn’t want a “job”, or can’t find a good one. Unless a family is wealthy, or there’s a bunch of kids I simply don’t see the greater benefit to a stay at home parent vs one that has a career but keeps the family as #1. Especially for school-aged kids. I am also not a fan of homeschooling.
But, if the partner enjoys the other being a homemaker and there aren’t money issues good for that couple. Different family dynamics work for different folks.
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I can see this, for sure. I don’t always think it’s the individual’s fault. Some of the people who just cannot afford college and don’t want to go into tens of thousands of dollars of debt for a bachelor’s degree that will get them a job that pays $30k a year might just decide that they can better direct their attention elsewhere, like their home/family. I don’t think that’s a cop out, as long as, like you said, their partner/family are on the same page.
How come? Just wondering. Half of the homeschool families I know are anti vaccine, socially awkward, and don’t do much to actually educate their children, and I assume this group is the one most think of when they hear “homeschoolers.” On the other hand, one of my professors (PhD in political science) and his college educated wife homeschool their kids. Pretty sure they’re learning Latin and everything. I think between their siblings, the neighborhood kids, and presumably friends made from sports and other activities they’re perfectly fine socially.
So I think it depends on the family. With how many public schools are these days, I absolutely think if done properly, many homeschooled kids can turn out just as smart and social, if not more, than public educated peers.
I wasn’t suggesting that, my apologies if that’s how it came across. I was referring more to the people who are consistently paying someone else to be at home with the kid when their sick, to be the one to take him to activities and sporting events, etc. In those cases I think their job has become a greater priority than their kid, as some other stranger has become the one who will be present as these events.
You recently had your first child, didn’t you? Congrats, hope all is well.
I think it’s much more difficult to socialize a kid in homeschooling (though not impossible) simply due to far less exposure time to other kids and social situations. Do homeschooled kids interact with 30 other kids in a classroom and 400 other kids of varying ages at recess everyday? No. Also, homeschooled kids tend to be schooled/socialized in groups that become echo chambers of shared values and socioeconomics as opposed to the much wider pool a kid is exposed to at schools.
College is affordable if you work your way through, take advantage of scholarships, and don’t go to expensive schools. If a person’s earning limit is only $30k/yr that would be a big red flag for me. They are likely either they are dumb, irresponsible, lazy, or are pursuing their passion with little life balance at the expense of stability, security and the rest of their life. Or a combo platter of the 4. Obviously exceptions exist, I’m speaking generally. IMO family should come first and everything gets compromised towards that goal.
And I was tongue in cheek about you supposing family wasn’t #1 for me. I know what you meant.
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We will be homeschooling our children. I’m part of a homeschooling fathers group that meets the first week of the month. A common misconception is that there is lack of socialization, but these days, with co-ops and pods, children can wind up with too much socialization in homeschooling if not restricted.
There are no guarantees in either path. And being a former publicly schooled kid in NYC, I have a strong hunch that for every homeschooled person with a poor outcome there’s a matched publicly schooled person.
Yes, most homeschooling parents are anti-vax, even some who are vaxed.
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I went to a Montessori school for kindergarten, learned how to read, write, and do basic math. I was then homeschooled for first through fifth grade. Most socialization with other kids was with neighborhood friends, art and foreign language classes at the cultural center, and city league soccer. I moved to Germany in sixth grade and went to the middle/high school my grandma taught at on a US Army base, and was surrounded by hundreds of kids from 13-19 years old for the first time in my life, and made plenty of friends easily.
Came back home, homeschooled another year, went to a small private school (not a good private school, haha) from eighth grade till the almost-end of my junior year, when I was expelled. Homeschooled again my senior year since I had like one class left to do, so it was so much quicker and easier to do on my own rather than transfer to another school.
Here I am in college, 4.0 GPA, in the honors program, creating some good relationships with professors, advisors, and fellow students. I’ve never struggled to socialize with people at any of the several jobs I’ve had, and I’ve worked in schools, rough bars, grocery stores, and a variety of other places. My strongest friendships are actually still with my high school buddies, but some college friends too.
I do completely agree with this. Most of the homeschoolers I know of come from families like this. While I was a homeschooled kid, my family was never really involved in any homeschool groups or friends with other homeschoolers. However, I’m pretty…I don’t know, flexible? My family has a variety of races, a variety of political and religious views, a variety of educational and income levels, etc. I’m pretty good at seeing both sides of things and being understanding of where most people are coming from, I believe mostly due to the “diversity” (that word is overused these days) of people in my life. (And I don’t mean racial diversity.)
Sorry to all who read all that unasked for information, haha. I guess my point is, @Californiagrown, is that while I agree with what you’re saying, I think it really just depends, like many things, largely on how well the parents do it. We live across the street from a homeschool family, where the kids seem unable to speak to strangers and we feels somewhat certain that the husband/dad is abusive. That is absolutely a dysfunctional family that is probably doing nothing good for their children by keeping them home.
On the other hand, there’s me. I turned out fine, and if my mom had not been the mom she is I would probably be in prison or dead by now. That is about how things have gone for many of the men around me. But I’m really doing better than most, really. My siblings are the same. So yeah, good parents can make this stuff work just fine, and I think the potential loss in some things (maybe you’re not seeing hundreds of kids at recess) isn’t always a huge loss.
Oh yeah, definitely. This is my view, and exactly what I’m currently doing, but for whatever reasons, not what 90% of my peers are. I’m not sure why you’d want to end up with debt if you don’t have to…but oh well.
Lotta jobs around here start at about $30-35k. Most of the ones I’m thinking of - teaching, social work, counseling, are right around there, with not much growth potential. Maybe you’d hit $50k after 20 years on the job. Depends on the field and your location I suppose.
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Out of curiosity, is this something you intend on doing all the way up through to year twelve?
I can’t imagine a 17-18y/old wanting to be around their parents all day.
What happens after then? What about college?
Are we referring to covid-19 vaccines or ALL vaccines… Kids need say, the measles vaccine. That is important.
I can see your concerns with public schooling, esp in NYC. They’re for the most part entirely valid
Unfortunately my car appears to have broken down this morning, so I’m fairly upset. Not relevant, just wanted to include this as a way to vent
Will respond later
“I’m sorry to hear about your car @unreal24278! That’s horrible!!!”
I haven’t discussed vaccines generally but all homeschoolers I’ve met (perhaps a few dozen) are anti-covid vax.
I got my first Pfizer dose, then got Covid. I’ll take my second dose in a week or two.
I live on Long Island now and moved here three years ago specifically because I did not want my children living or attending school in Queens.
I’m not sure how long.
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