Is stripping a well paying job? Because she sounds like a stripper or porn actress.
Chef. Making choco tacos.
And this is why math is important kids.When it comes to dignity, priceless≠worthless.
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So it appears that yes, stripping is a well paying job!
It’s odd to me that these reporters (?) are, like, BREAKING OPEN THE HIDDEN TRUTH of prostitution. I’m over here clutching my peals in shocked horror. WHO KNEW that girls get paid for sex and that some girls are using social media for this exact purpose??
I hope some of these girls are saving their money so they can go to college and develop an income stream that doesn’t dry up when they’re 27.
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Not just that though, but that they’re doing the THING! The one that nobody will talk about.
The one that Pablo Escobar reportedly used to have women do.
The forbidden cheeze whizz.
The doo-doo. 
Yes, and as @zecarlo notes, there is vast under reporting of these certain things.
I also was unfortunate in that I had a violent, destructive older brother. He was 6’4" as an adult and at 3 years older than me was impossible for me to defend against as a kid. This is not a common circumstance, but neither is it uncommon. I currently work with two young women with this history, and there have been many more over the years. I have a coworker who grew up this way. We’re the girls who curl up in a ball while a larger adversary kicks us until they feel done kicking and move on to some other activity. None of it reported except to the parents who didn’t do anything about it.
I don’t know how many times I’ve felt threatened by teen or adult men over the years. Backed into corners, worried things were going poorly and might escalate, or just general unpleasantness with drunk guys. I’m similarly afraid of large, angry dogs. I’ve never reported anything to anyone.
I have been fascinated watching MMA at the difference between a man weighing in at 130 and myself at that weight. There is simply nothing alike about us, and I spent my at-risk years (ages 16-24) 15 pounds lighter than that.
Okay, but wait…this sounds like I had some sort of list including “must support me in X fashion,” and I didn’t. I wanted someone who was debt-free and who had savings, as I did. Someone for whom those things are a priority, as they are for me. Bearing in mind that we were not just starting out, and both of us had experienced marriages with impulsive, foolish partners. I did have a list of qualities when I met my ex-husband at age 23, but unfortunately I lacked discernment. There were character issues that should have been apparent, but weren’t. So would parental input have helped? In my case, no. My father was a good man in his way, but he grew up in an abusive, alcoholic home and had some severe deficits as a parent. So if he’d told me he didn’t like my boyfriend, I’d have probably ignored him. My mother would have had more sway with me, but she died when I was 21, after leaving me with my father and brother when I was 12 “to go find herself.” Still, if she’d been around to say that she worried about him, I’d have listened to some degree and maybe moved less quickly.
Women should absolutely have a list of requirements when evaluating mates, as should men. Kind. Steady. Agreeable is nice! Some women use looks as a trade for money. I guess if both partners agree to this trade, rock on! I do agree that parents should counsel children on both finances and relationships. It’s just that so many children come from homes where parental marriages were a joke, they have no credibility.
Oh, I didn’t watch either of them the whole way through. We hadn’t gotten to that, haha.
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That is not what I meant. I actually didn’t mean anything more than I stated: there was a financial stipulation, which is entirely reasonable. And there should be one if people want marriage to work. I wasn’t referring to amazing expectations.
Even if a woman has that stipulation to be supported, that’s her business, and I don’t think there’s something “wrong” with that either. Obviously you didn’t say “he has to support me,” but if you did have that in mind, I’d think nothing wrong with it either. Whether an individual woman can get a man meeting this requirement is a different story.
My overarching point, in response to Grool, was that there are women (and their family members) who aren’t easily charmed and aren’t stupid for whom being funny and interesting won’t cut it. They have stipulations and if men don’t meet them, they are not spoken to. Some woman like my hypergamous second cousin, who stated, “I’ll only date a doctor or lawyer,” and wound up with a tall, handsome dentist with his own practice, wasn’t going to be swayed by jokes.
Well that certainly should be a priority. My wife and I talk about money on a weekly basis. What money came in? What was spent? What are we putting towards investments? What do the kids need? What are we going to sign them up for and what are the costs (ballet, soccer, swimming)?
And there are other stipulations that can’t be overcome either, like race, class, religion, and religion. As I said before, my first crush would not go out with me because I was not Greek. I could not turn myself Greek, and I couldn’t overcome that by being funny.
This is ultimately what I’ve been getting at.
Finally for this post, I’ll point out this notion in the modern West of marriage as marriage only between two individuals when in many cases it is the joining of two families, and I think one of the reasons my marriage has worked so far is partly because of this. I don’t view it as the former. If others want to, that’s fine.
Choices of mates without consideration for families is now a foreign concept to me. Of course I didn’t think like that for much of my life. I can see and accept that others have a dim view of this.
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It wasn’t money that kept them from college.
The movie Titanic makes no sense to me. They should have made the fiance fat and ugly, not just kinda mean. It doesn’t seem believable to me (I mean the romance part, not the sinking part). She leaves a guy with model looks, tons of money and social status, who her mother loves for a poor guy that also looks good.
The fiance seems to care about her. His behavior also doesn’t make sense either. He’d know that he has tons of attractive options basically lining up the moment he was interested. It doesn’t make sense that he didn’t just cut her loose when she was interested in the other guy.
I suppose I’ve seen less believable things in the movies though.
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I see it as enviable, but unrealistic in our society for most people due to the mobility often required for jobs or other reasons. We just don’t seem to have that kind of grounding, by and large.
We do this, too, and it’s one of my favorite things. When my husband and I first combined our incomes I needed weekly budget meetings because I was so paranoid in this arena. I remember him saying “could we not do this a little less often, maybe monthly when we pay the bills?” Which is about how often we do it now, maybe twice a month if something is going on. It’s usually Saturday or Sunday morning in bed, and it’s just a happy time for me. Partly because things are always ok and safe, partly because it’s when we dream and plan. This sounds really weird and lame, but I love the way he approaches money and saving. It’s a joy of my heart, even coming up on our 9th anniversary of living together (6 years married).
Feminism gave me him. Living more traditionally with my kids’ dad (I was the SAHM of four children) gave me anxiety and doubt.
No, but it won’t be billionaires who provide them a livable middle age.
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tbh, I feel like this is the case for most romance movies.
Ppl, especially females my age and slightly younger, seem to think it’s romantic that ppl make huge sacrifices for what amounts to a stranger.
I’ve been cleaning house and thinking about this. You and I often have a push/pull dynamic, which is often more to do with the thought provoking nature of your posts for me than it is general disagreement, but I imagine they may look the same to you. That being the case, I want to go on record as being in complete agreement with this as an ideal to strive for. The only problem I have is that it doesn’t make sense to me given what I know of Western culture, and I find the idea of it being somehow legislated scarier than what we have at present.
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I’m here to discuss the gender pay gap. As an advocate of gender equality, I feel like we need to raise awareness of the rampant sexism that has resulted in my unacceptably low OnlyFans revenue.
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You must be doing something wrong. Have you tried hashtagging the billionaires?
Thank you.
It’s all good. I think a forum would be boring if there weren’t varied and opposing ideas and views.
I don’t think it has to be legislated. Setting up matches on dates and vetting potential spouses aren’t actions that need legislation. Interviewing and spending a day with a suitor or woman doesn’t need interference by anyone; it’s simply a family thing.
For example, in the future, when my son is getting to know a woman, she can spend a day with my wife and daughter without him or me around. A suitor for my daughter can spend a day with me and my son without the women around.
Either one can be invited over for a dinner.
Some questions:
Where is this person from?
What is the trade or profession?
How does he/she behave, dress, and talk?
What is the family background?
Do any of us see red flags that another can’t?
Why does this person want to be with my child?
“What are your intentions with my daughter/son?”
After several months both families can meet. Are the families compatible?
None of these imply some grandiose measure against all problems or utopian thinking.
I have a hunch that many Americans don’t like this sort of stuff because it seems restraining. Hence in the rare cases I’ve discussed such thoughts with boomers, typical responses are, “s/he has his “own” life, and, “when they turn eighteen,” and “when they’re out of the house.” It seems as if it’s a reminder: get ready for disappointment. I can be misinterpreting them though.
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Not disputing your numbers. A growing number of young people, especially men, seem to suffer from some pathological form of loneliness.
However, the devil is in the details. Women on social networks and espcially those aweful dating apps are groomed to act like haughty sluts. In offline world, it’s different, though. I find that men have an easier time than ever getting positive reactions if they show up presentable, smart, funny and confident. Many boys, however, already checked out of dating & socialising. Worse, young people have less friends than ever. They are sitting around, bored, anxious and alone.
So the conundrum is more about whipping the next generation of potential studs into shape, I’d say.
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Do you think something can be done to halt this behavior? I assume, though perhaps mistakenly, if I recall your posts elsewhere correctly, that you are someone who thinks this has a negative effect on society. If so, what do you think can be done to regulate the Western sexual market. I say Western specifically because it appears whenever sexual regulation is mentioned people start thinking “like the Middle East, bro”.
I apologize if I assumed wrong.
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Jonathan Haidt his written and spoken on this on many podcasts. As much as I and many do not like it, there most likely has to be some sort of Government intervention/regulation. The effects of social media on developing/young minds in nothing but negative.
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I’ll check that out. Thanks for the recommendation.
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These are good questions.
I don’t know. I do think some of it is luck. I think good parenting happens in any number of family cultures with positive outcomes for the kids. I think very diligent parents sometimes raise kids who go their own way regardless, while sometimes the most wonderful human beings rise out of the most terrible homes.
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Hey, @Spock81, will you come back and tell us what you’re looking for? What’s on your ideal mate “yes” list?
You’re one of the coolest, quirkiest people ever, and I think everyone here would love to see you happy. Don’t run away, stay and let us work for you.
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