I’m a Chinese Catholic. I’m double fucked.
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I think I’ve written an analogy before which goes something like this:
EDIT:
Actual quote from 2018:
I think the worst are the guys who ask why they’re not gaining weight and then insist that they’re doing nothing wrong when told to eat more because an online calculator gave them their optimal caloric intake.
It’s like let’s say the internet tells you the optimal times to wipe your ass after taking a dump is 5. You do that and your ass still isn’t clean, do you just pull up your pants and go online and ask, “Hey guys, there’s still shit stuck in my ass after wiping 5 times. Should I change the brand of the toilet paper I’m using?”
Fuck, this shit always happens in cycles. Now the new excuse seems to be thy***d problems. A follow up post I also made in 2018:
Thanks guys.
But y’all do get my point, right?
Not only that, there are people who will answer, “Have you tried xxxx brand of toilet paper?”
Q: “Not gaining weight despite eating 5000 calories. Is my program good for hypertrophy?”
A: “Do Texas Method.”
Can’t quote directly from that thread because it’s already been closed. They’re from the first Flame Free thread.
EDIT:
BTW, if anyone want to search for stuff really easily, type in your keywords before typing “site:t-nation.com” (or any other site) without the double double quotation marks in the google search bar.
Flame free!
I have Graves, and it is my thyroid you insensitive fucks!!! 
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I love everything about the direction this conversation is going.
It’s why I’m so quick to tell people to read Super Squats or Deep Water and just do that program. Drink a gallon of milk a day and squat your face off, or eat 18 eggs and 2lbs of meat and…squat your face off. You’re bound to grow.
But NOOOO, gotta have that 2x a week stimulation. It’s science!
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I’ll bet you half of these fellows won’t follow the diet recommended for Deep Water and then start whining about the program making them lose gainz.
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I’d take that bet, just because I’m sure it’ll well more than half, haha. I’m seeing dudes struggle with that on another forum. Don’t understand this fear of eating.
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Haha yeah I was being generous. People can’t even do something simple like chug a gallon of milk. How do you even expect them to eat so many eggs alone lol.
Shit I confess even I got sick of it and modified the diet a little but I did it in an appropriate manner and still got them gainz, brahs. However, I don’t think a noob without much experience in eating, as in really focusing on diet to push past the multiple inevitable stalls in weight gain as you gradually progress over the years, can do that.
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Milk and squats.
Classic
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This also highlights another grip I have with the milking beginner gains shit. It creates the assumption that you don’t have to, or shouldn’t go nuts with the calories like you did when you were a noob at times to push past really hard stalls in gains later for fear of getting fat.
People don’t get that the body wants to maintain equilibrium while also having the ability to adapt. Sometimes you need to go nuts and accept the fat gain when it finally decides to say, “Fuck you, I’ve had enough.”. It will eventually create a “new” equilibrium when you get past this.
Every time we push it to failure during training, this happens. The body is responding to something extreme you throw at it and adapting and changing. It’s the same for eating. We don’t just accept it when gains stall in this area. We explore different routines and incorporate new stuff like higher intensity techniques to force further adaptation even at the risk of overtraining. Why isn’t it the same mindset for eating?
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To say nothing of the fact that so much “fat gain” is just some belly bloat that comes with having a gut full of FOOD. But no: been bulking for 2 weeks and I’m fat now: time to cut.
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I doubt if you’re fat, PWN……legends don’t get fat. And they don’t get old.
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Thanks man. I’ve definitely gotten fat and been fat, but these days that’s a struggle, haha.
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Pffft!!! You people and your gallons of milk. 
This just popped up, and then you wonder. It’s all you need 
Is that only like for breakfast or lunch or something? What about the rest of the days meals?
Also, that cucumber looks suspicious.
Well… it says breakfast for gaining. You know as much as I do. I assume you fast the rest of the time… lol
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Honestly, with the junk I see, it could be much worse.
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I just have never understood counting nuts when you are trying to gain weight. I count them by the handful.
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Yeah…that’s what I was thinking…lol
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Wednesday looks like an interesting day in Texas….
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I find that, if I don’t count them going in, I end up counting them coming out.
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