Be cooler if it were Vegeta…
LOL 
a wild Goku has appeared!
HOLY SHITE MIRACLES DO HAPPEN!!!
Canned mackerel is not only back in stock, it’s back in stock at the ORIGINAL PRICE!!!
I worked the entirety of Black Friday in one of my stores.
We ended up about 5% down from last year, but with this economy I’m marking it as a win.
I thoroughly enjoyed it and haven’t done it in years.
4 Likes
My friend brought me a bag of leftover Turkey dark meat yesterday. I confess I woke up and ate all of it this morning.
~1000calories worth lol
3 Likes
I hope there’s a section discussing the dangers of firearms on Catnip.
Just say “no”.
1 Like
Anyone else have a default response when people say certain things to you? Mine bit me in the ASS today…
Whenever someone says something like:
“i want to be just like you when i grow up” (usually referring to muscles)
My response goes like:
“Nah man, I’m just tryna get like you”.
So today when the dude holding a sign with the words “hungry anything helps” said that to me…
3 Likes
mine is “yes… and…”
I use this when ppl drop statements without context and expect me to know what they are talking about/guess what they are thinking about
2 Likes
I’m playing a video game right now and there’s this one part in the game where you have to cross dress.
Right now I’m just waiting for my Dad to go upstairs, the game is paused
2 Likes
Panhandlers: " You got a dollar for a brother in need?".
Me: “How much do you have?”
Them: Tilts cup.
Me: “Thats more than I have. You got any for me?”.
Or when I smoked:
“Yo man, bum me a square…”
Me: “They’re a dollar a piece.”
I’ve gotten a surprising number of dollars.
4 Likes
It’s kind simple and self absorbed, but I like it.
Apparently I really tapped into something with that one.
3 Likes
When people ask me how I’m doing these days, I just say “I am well” and no longer follow up with “How are you?”, because THAT has bitten me more often than I needed.
And it’s comical too, because people are so conditioned to receive the return question that they are really caught off guard when I don’t render it. Some even just give me an answer anyway despite the absence.
2 Likes
One of my favorite comedy skits is from Tom Segura. I can’t find the skit where it’s not part of a lot longer bit, but essentially he goes “when someone says “how are you?” There are only two responses. Good, or fine. If you actually answer with how you are, that is psychopathic, and I hate you”. I feel that to my soul.
Also, a personal favorite of mine is when people respond just slightly wrong. As in, I pass a coworker and say “hey what’s up” and they respond “good, you?” Like, I get what you mean, it’s 100% a preconditioned response, but also 100% not a response to what I said lol.
I will also say, I started something about a year ago. With all of my sailors, whenever I walk bye I try to say “how ya doing?” And if they give me a real response, I stop. 9 times out of 10, it’s a conversation that won’t take more than 2 minutes, but that quick pause to listen to what’s new in their life lets me know a lot more about what’s going on with them than any counseling or formal check in, and they seem to really appreciate if I take the time to listen about their new car purchase or how their kids kicking ass at soccer. Idk if it matters in the long run, but it makes me feel more connected with my guys, and I really value that for my own sake.
6 Likes
I always chuckle when HR departments of white collar businesses talk about “employee well being” when most of blue collar workers in labor intensive industries are at least one of the following at all times: high/drunk/sleep deprived/exhausted/injured/in chronic pain
1 Like
Yeah, that would be a good daily checklist. If you get all six they give you a day off on your next paycheck!
Fuck. Had a MOTHERFUCKING House Md moment last night.
Brother lives at parents house because he’s got a 6 month old. Just note that he’s not a bum. He has his own place and his wife’s family is pretty highly connected. The dude wants my parents and grandmother to be able to spend time with the kid.
One of the dogs - mini-Schnauzer and Poodle mix - keeps lunging for the kid.
THIS IS A FUCKING SIMPLE THING TO SOLVE.
Dog lovers, PLEASE understand that I’m not dissing dogs at all. I’ve had 7 in my life. I’m pretty familiar with their behavior since they are pack animals PLUS I lived near a plantation where there were 2 monkey troops that frequently had gang wars. Kids would run to watch them. Google vids on how these fuckers engage to see why lol.
Dogs, in MY EXPERIENCE, are basically like monkeys but they’re fucking stupid. AGAIN, I’m not dissing them. I’m just saying they are VERY EASY to handle.
The problem is every time the dog lunges for the kid, they quickly swipe the KID AWAY.
A dog is a pack animal. The fucker is just asserting dominance. You DO NOT MOVE the KID away. You hold the kid in a position where the kid is safe and scare the DOG AWAY. If the kid is held in the right position, not only is it safe, when you scare the dog by whatever method you use - shout, hit (not what I’d do but parent’s have always done this to our 7 dogs), whatever - you inadvertently motion the kid towards the dog.
Since dogs are fucking stupid, it will gradually associate the kid with being in the higher pecking order. If you swipe the kid away, the dog thinks the kid RAN AWAY. To top it off, the only time they feel safe letting the kid pay when the dog is around is when the kid in placed in a playpen in the living room.
The dog sees that as a CAGE. Because whenever we bring home a new puppy, it’s placed in a similar pen for a couple of weeks.
Kid in cage. Dog has rest of living room. Who’s the master? Fuck.
So, here’s where the FUCKING HOUSE MD PART COMES IN.
Mother has groomer friend. Groomer friend knows a pet behaviorist. Ok. You don’t want to listen to me after weeks of telling you what to do, maybe a legit pet behaviorist will give you more insight since I have to hold back when talking to my parents cos I’m from a very fucking traditional Chinese family.
Then she says the pet behaviorist had a CONVERSATION WITH HER FRIEND’S DOG. Told her friend the dog had some medical problem. Took dog to vet. Vet confirmed.
I wanted to YELL lolololol.
All the fucking qigong, fortune tellers, fengshui fucks I could handle since everyone is fucking superstitious where I live and it’s all part of S.E Asian Chinese culture and religion.
A FUCKING PET PSYCHIC???
I asked her as nicely as I could to avoid getting smacked by my Dad.
“The dog had some explicit signs of certain problems, which is why the “pet behaviorist” was called. Right?”
“Yes”.
"The dog was not brought to the vet prior to that since it was only after the “pet behaviorist” said the dog has some medical problem where the dog was taken to the vet for a diagnosis, right?
“Yes”.
“The pet behaviorist is probably familiar with certain explicit symptoms of ailments anumals have when they’re not behaving normally. What she should have done was take the dog to the vet first.”.
“But the psychic really whispered to the dog and the dog replied,”
FUCK.
FUCK.
FUCK.
I’m done lol.
4 Likes
I confess I’m wondering how much a plate is, when someone is referring to lifting several plates.
As an excuse I never cared for this before recently heading into heavier lifting (as my other questions lately may show evidence of).
45lbs in the US, 20kg everywhere else.
When someone says they hit 2 plates, that is per side of the barbell. So a 2 plate bench has 4 plates total lifted, for a weight of 225lbs.
3 Likes