Can’t speak for anyone else, but in my case, I was (and am) sick of the habits and responses that had been ingrained. That shit needed a repair instead of just a patch.
Sometimes you gotta take 2 steps back in order to take 3 forward.
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I confess that the only multi-millionaire I know drove a 2004 Dodge Caravan as his one-and-only vehicle until a few years ago when he splurged on himself with a used V-6 Ford Mustang.
They also do a lot of good things with their money that have nothing to do with accumulating stuff.
#moneygoals
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Sadly the Holden and Ford utes are no longer manufactured over here, as all car manufacturing in Australia went the way of the dodo 5 years ago. Second had prices on utes is going crazy especially anything with a big V8 in it.
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My brother was worth in excess of $5M when he passed in 2001. He drove a 1999 Mazda PU that he paid cash for - manual transmission, roll up windows, vinyl seats. He lived in a 2/1 home that he paid cash for. He cut his own hair.
There has to be a balance somewhere between accumulating money and enjoying the money.
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I’m really struggling with this right now.
Exactly. Although I’ve never ever asked anyone to drag deeply painful stuff to the surface. Some people deal with the here-and-now (e.g. communication or organizational skills, relaxation strategies), others need to examine more deeply what events meant at the time, and what impact they’re having now, and resolve them or develop strategies for managing them.
It’s never one thing, unless you go to someone who specializes in a particular technique - and they should state that clearly and explain what it means. A psychiatrist in my office does psychodynamic work, which is pretty Freudian. I could never tolerate it as a patient, but no one goes in blind.
Honestly, it’s like diet and fitness. A thousand approaches and a thousand levels of difficulty for thousands of possible outcomes. Some good and some not.
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His joy was traveling. Granted, as an ER doctor he generated a lot of wealth, but he spent it on travel, not the home or the car.
So yes, I agree, balance is important. Keeping focused on what is important helps keep that balance.
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I’ve reached this point in my life.
I have enough stuff. I have too much stuff. I don’t want or need more stuff. All of my stuff is suffocating me.
I want experiences. I want memories. I want things I can take with me that take up no space.
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Full agreement. I stopped desiring “things” as soon as I wasn’t broke, funny how that works.
Early on my S/O and I agreed on no gifts for birthdays and holidays in favor of putting that money towards vacations. Been the best gifts we could ever give each other.
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From 18-late 20s I was all about experience, accumulated effectively nothing. Next 5 years did a lot of accumulation and a little experience. Leaning back towards experience, still have a few physical goods I want but they are all pretty much just different weightlifting toys.
This 1000%. Wish I could like this comment more
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I still want quite a lot of stuff. But, this is a cool comment so I am going to like it.
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You’re at an age where stuff accumulation is important. Nothing wrong with that.
My wife and I knew we had “made it” the first time we turned down free furniture. When we started out as newly-weds, we took EVERYTHING we were offered. One day, someone asked if we wanted a bookshelf or something like that, we both looked at each other and agreed that we didn’t need it. It was a big moment.
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I like not having stuff, but I really enjoy buying other ppl stuff.
I’m also not a big fan of traveling so idk where that puts me
Experiences don’t have to be travel. I love learning. Signing up for a cooking class, or taking up a martial art, or auditing community college courses, new musical instrument, etc. Some of these experiences come with “stuff”, but still.
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Good point.
I’m choosing to go for a PhD despite the huge opportunity cost. I’m thankful everyday that I have the luxury to do so
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It makes me more sad for most people that buy status symbol items than envious.
I think a lot of times people want these things so that they will be accepted into a group or something. I guess I don’t want to be part of a group like that.
I think most people very much adapt to a level of luxury. Once you have it, it doesn’t feel special anymore. Hedonistic treadmill is a term I have heard. It becomes harder to appreciate the simpler things the more you indulge in luxury. A cold grain belt premium was a nice treat on a Friday night, now it is fancy beers at the brewery, and I would feel deprived with just the cold brew at home. I need to get back to my old ways.
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There’s a bit of cultural toxicity at play as well. People are mocked for enjoying simple things. “You like pumpkin spice in the fall? How basic! You eat hot dogs? That’s for children!”
Or remember the “musical obscurity arms race” we used to engage in where you couldn’t like popular bands, and it was all about liking a band no one had ever heard of?
The comedy being that, in an attempt to be as individual as possible, people take the same route as everyone else to get there.
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