What did I do this time?
Speaking of ice queen…it’s snowing here. Yep.
[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
LOL, I ignore ignorance, and am apathetic towards such a pathetic human being.
Plus I would go broke on all the peanut butter he masturbates with.[/quote]
wtf is with you and masturbating with peanut butter? It’s been messing with my head since the first time I saw you say it like 2 years ago. I’ve been close to doing it ever since then too.
[/quote]
omg I’m getting a visual… pics or it didn’t happen[/quote]
of course you would want my PB dipped chocolate bar. I’ll give you some if you can finish it all in one bite.
[/quote]
Haha if I could finish it all in one bite, that could either mean something good about me… or something not so good about you 
But for the record, I love a good chocolate and peanut butter combination. 
I have the runs:(
GOOD MORNING EVERYONE!!!
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
I disagree. It might feel like it’s helping at the time but you’re still being destructive to yourself. Being productive will also lead to comfort down the road, and you won’t have to deal with the whole “shit I really let myself go” revelation after the pain stops.
In other words, it’s logical to focus your pain somewhere, and it’s a more sound endeavour to focus it in a productive path as you emerge with a plus rather than the minus you would emerge with if you chose the self-destructive path.
[/quote]
Thing is, I totally agree with you. But a fuck ton of people can’t gather themselves and see/act like that.
I spent a long time at the bottom of a bottle, and/or just generally depressed sober too. When you are so down you are comfortable miserable, you can’t see the light.
I commend you, and am impressed with your outlook, but a lot of people can’t find whatever it is you have that allows you to think and feel this way.
[/quote]
It took me a few times taking the destructive road to figure it out. It a more poignant message when you figure it out for yourself tbh. I had heard that advice when I was younger … maybe 10 years ago. But, like everyone else, I had to learn it through experience.
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
What did I do this time?
Speaking of ice queen…it’s snowing here. Yep.[/quote]
Like you don’t know…
Polo is a very intelligent and thoughtful person, and I mean no disrespect…
But…
a few more miles on his odometer will definitely allow more compassion to those of us who find solace and acceptance in spending time wallowing in self pity, destructive sex and booze. Only to rise out of the ashes to find the light of day.
Feels as good to drag the bottom as it does to fly high. And the result is a new and transformed person, stronger both mentally and physically.
again, my $.02, and keep in mind, I don’t know shit.
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]Ct. Rockula wrote:
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
LOL, I ignore ignorance, and am apathetic towards such a pathetic human being.
Plus I would go broke on all the peanut butter he masturbates with.[/quote]
wtf is with you and masturbating with peanut butter? It’s been messing with my head since the first time I saw you say it like 2 years ago. I’ve been close to doing it ever since then too.
[/quote]
omg I’m getting a visual… pics or it didn’t happen[/quote]
of course you would want my PB dipped chocolate bar. I’ll give you some if you can finish it all in one bite.
[/quote]
Haha if I could finish it all in one bite, that could either mean something good about me… or something not so good about you But for the record, I love a good chocolate and peanut butter combination. :)[/quote]
I’m placing my bets on you being hungry enough to handle it. No need to tell me you like chocolate, everyone does.
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Edgy wrote:
Going through a ‘self destructive phase’ leads to comfort down the road. After a breakup, or death, drinking and sex helps to fill the void in your life. It keeps you company and helps you to heal.
Been through a few breakups, and having a few deaths in the family, I know what helps me.
My $.02.
Pch - hang in there, it will all get better, and the more you get it out of your system, the less it will poison your soul.[/quote]
I disagree. It might feel like it’s helping at the time but you’re still being destructive to yourself. Being productive will also lead to comfort down the road, and you won’t have to deal with the whole “shit I really let myself go” revelation after the pain stops.
In other words, it’s logical to focus your pain somewhere, and it’s a more sound endeavour to focus it in a productive path as you emerge with a plus rather than the minus you would emerge with if you chose the self-destructive path.
FTR: I don’t consider having sex to be self-destructive as long as you’re safe about it and guard your reputation.[/quote]
I knew you were smart, Polo, but I didn’t realize you had such great insight as well. Nice I went the “be productive and have a goal” path myself in the face of a major break up, and this is why I gave the same sort of advice… self-improvement sure beats self-destruction.
Ie feel like i’m in a sound proof room.
By the time my frigging posts show up, another page will be started.
Edit: SEE?!? That’s exactly what happened! wtf.
I feel like the last few months have already been my destructive phase.
[quote]Edgy wrote:
Polo is a very intelligent and thoughtful person, and I mean no disrespect…
But…
a few more miles on his odometer will definitely allow more compassion to those of us who find solace and acceptance in spending time wallowing in self pity, destructive sex and booze. Only to rise out of the ashes to find the light of day.
Feels as good to drag the bottom as it does to fly high. And the result is a new and transformed person, stronger both mentally and physically.
again, my $.02, and keep in mind, I don’t know shit. [/quote]
difference of opinion regarding the grieving process. People aren’t logical when emotions run high. I get it, I just think it’s counter-intuitive and illogical. Regardless of where my emotions are at, I can’t bring myself to regress in the other aspects of my life that are progressive; but I do get it. I’ve been there, just like everyone else who’s not afraid to be vulnerable has.
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Edgy wrote:
Going through a ‘self destructive phase’ leads to comfort down the road. After a breakup, or death, drinking and sex helps to fill the void in your life. It keeps you company and helps you to heal.
Been through a few breakups, and having a few deaths in the family, I know what helps me.
My $.02.
Pch - hang in there, it will all get better, and the more you get it out of your system, the less it will poison your soul.[/quote]
I disagree. It might feel like it’s helping at the time but you’re still being destructive to yourself. Being productive will also lead to comfort down the road, and you won’t have to deal with the whole “shit I really let myself go” revelation after the pain stops.
In other words, it’s logical to focus your pain somewhere, and it’s a more sound endeavour to focus it in a productive path as you emerge with a plus rather than the minus you would emerge with if you chose the self-destructive path.
FTR: I don’t consider having sex to be self-destructive as long as you’re safe about it and guard your reputation.[/quote]
I knew you were smart, Polo, but I didn’t realize you had such great insight as well. Nice I went the “be productive and have a goal” path myself in the face of a major break up, and this is why I gave the same sort of advice… self-improvement sure beats self-destruction.[/quote]
Thanks HT … the human condition fascinates me. Trying to figure it out is a life long interest as is trying to offer up the best advice I can muster
[quote]polo77j wrote:
…I just think it’s counter-intuitive and illogical…[/quote]
But grief isn’t logical. It’s all well and good to say “I’m going to show that motherfucker, I’m going to do ____!” but when you’re broken, there’s a certain amount of depression that can make positive action impossible.
I would wager that Polo’s an optimistic cheery motherfucker type, and Edgy (and myself, and other people who are more destructive with grief) are a bit less…uh…rainbowy.
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Edgy wrote:
Going through a ‘self destructive phase’ leads to comfort down the road. After a breakup, or death, drinking and sex helps to fill the void in your life. It keeps you company and helps you to heal.
Been through a few breakups, and having a few deaths in the family, I know what helps me.
My $.02.
Pch - hang in there, it will all get better, and the more you get it out of your system, the less it will poison your soul.[/quote]
I disagree. It might feel like it’s helping at the time but you’re still being destructive to yourself. Being productive will also lead to comfort down the road, and you won’t have to deal with the whole “shit I really let myself go” revelation after the pain stops.
In other words, it’s logical to focus your pain somewhere, and it’s a more sound endeavour to focus it in a productive path as you emerge with a plus rather than the minus you would emerge with if you chose the self-destructive path.
FTR: I don’t consider having sex to be self-destructive as long as you’re safe about it and guard your reputation.[/quote]
I knew you were smart, Polo, but I didn’t realize you had such great insight as well. Nice I went the “be productive and have a goal” path myself in the face of a major break up, and this is why I gave the same sort of advice… self-improvement sure beats self-destruction.[/quote]
Thanks HT … the human condition fascinates me. Trying to figure it out is a life long interest as is trying to offer up the best advice I can muster :)[/quote]
Well, we have something in common then. I see people struggling with all kinds of issues every day where I work, and I’ve learned a thing or two through observation and actively helping others… and some personal experiences as well. You’re still in school, right? What is your professional goal anyway? Just curious… you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Edgy wrote:
Going through a ‘self destructive phase’ leads to comfort down the road. After a breakup, or death, drinking and sex helps to fill the void in your life. It keeps you company and helps you to heal.
Been through a few breakups, and having a few deaths in the family, I know what helps me.
My $.02.
Pch - hang in there, it will all get better, and the more you get it out of your system, the less it will poison your soul.[/quote]
I disagree. It might feel like it’s helping at the time but you’re still being destructive to yourself. Being productive will also lead to comfort down the road, and you won’t have to deal with the whole “shit I really let myself go” revelation after the pain stops.
In other words, it’s logical to focus your pain somewhere, and it’s a more sound endeavour to focus it in a productive path as you emerge with a plus rather than the minus you would emerge with if you chose the self-destructive path.
FTR: I don’t consider having sex to be self-destructive as long as you’re safe about it and guard your reputation.[/quote]
I knew you were smart, Polo, but I didn’t realize you had such great insight as well. Nice I did this myself in the face of a major break up, and this is why I gave the same sort of advice… self-improvement sure beats self-destruction.[/quote]
Self-destruction isn’t a conscious decision, it’s something that happens, you go through it, wake yourself up, pull yourself up, and move on.
I have a lot of respect for guys and gals who go through a “dark period” and are able to pull themselves out of it. I’ve had two phases in my adulthood where I went through some deep dark stuff. You definitely learn a lot about yourself when that sort of thing happens.
I don’t recommend it, but if it happens it’s not necessarily a bad thing.
All the self-help guru stuff seems like a tuxedo and tophat away from snake oil sales to me. Never believed that BS.
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
What is your professional goal anyway? Just curious… you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to :)[/quote]
So we are calling ghey midget porn a profession now?
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
What is your professional goal anyway? Just curious… you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to :)[/quote]
So we are calling ghey midget porn a profession now?[/quote]
LOL! I had no idea, Polo… I guess I don’t buy the same pornos that Beans does
[quote]countingbeans wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
What is your professional goal anyway? Just curious… you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to :)[/quote]
So we are calling ghey midget porn a profession now?[/quote]
Yes. They are just as important as fluffers!
[quote]pushmepullme wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
…I just think it’s counter-intuitive and illogical…[/quote]
But grief isn’t logical. It’s all well and good to say “I’m going to show that motherfucker, I’m going to do ____!” but when you’re broken, there’s a certain amount of depression that can make positive action impossible.
I would wager that Polo’s an optimistic cheery motherfucker type, and Edgy (and myself, and other people who are more destructive with grief) are a bit less…uh…rainbowy.[/quote]
Schmea, I’ve had bad days PMPM, I just can’t see the point in being destructive when things don’t go my way. I understand greif isn’t logical, I already acknowledged that. Emotions aren’t logical, good or bad. Doesn’t mean your reactions have to be illogical, also. I get angry just like everyone else. And I"m sure you’ve noticed through my posts here that I"m not that cheery.
I also think it’s a bad idea to do anything out of spite, regardless of what it is. To say, “I’m going to improve myself to show this asshole what he’s missing,” makes the same amount of sense as saying, "I’m going to go get drunk and video tape me railing this slut that she hates and email it to her and all her friends.
That’ll show her!" Neither will make you any better than you are. It’s a dead end. Both paths. What happens when you lose that spite? You lose the motivation to do whatever productive thing you were doing or you lost the motivation for being self-destructive.
Then you’re stuck with nothing. Again. You haven’t made any positive change. You haven’t improved yourself or your situation. It’s especially nullifying when you realize the spited doesn’t care.
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Hot Tamale wrote:
[quote]polo77j wrote:
[quote]Edgy wrote:
Going through a ‘self destructive phase’ leads to comfort down the road. After a breakup, or death, drinking and sex helps to fill the void in your life. It keeps you company and helps you to heal.
Been through a few breakups, and having a few deaths in the family, I know what helps me.
My $.02.
Pch - hang in there, it will all get better, and the more you get it out of your system, the less it will poison your soul.[/quote]
I disagree. It might feel like it’s helping at the time but you’re still being destructive to yourself. Being productive will also lead to comfort down the road, and you won’t have to deal with the whole “shit I really let myself go” revelation after the pain stops.
In other words, it’s logical to focus your pain somewhere, and it’s a more sound endeavour to focus it in a productive path as you emerge with a plus rather than the minus you would emerge with if you chose the self-destructive path.
FTR: I don’t consider having sex to be self-destructive as long as you’re safe about it and guard your reputation.[/quote]
I knew you were smart, Polo, but I didn’t realize you had such great insight as well. Nice I went the “be productive and have a goal” path myself in the face of a major break up, and this is why I gave the same sort of advice… self-improvement sure beats self-destruction.[/quote]
Thanks HT … the human condition fascinates me. Trying to figure it out is a life long interest as is trying to offer up the best advice I can muster :)[/quote]
Well, we have something in common then. I see people struggling with all kinds of issues every day where I work, and I’ve learned a thing or two through observation and actively helping others… and some personal experiences as well. You’re still in school, right? What is your professional goal anyway? Just curious… you don’t have to answer that if you don’t want to :)[/quote]
I’m studying economics at the moment. I’m shooting for an MBA ultimately (or not I might get another degree on top of that). Sooner or later, after some experience, I want to open a consulting firm.