Per the title of this log, Planet Cybertron has been laid to rest. I no longer compete or move heavy weights as I used to.
Lot of things have happened over the last two years. Divorced, remarried, lost a family member to suicide, relapsed myself with self harm, etc.
All in all to say I’m still here. Have given my life over to Christ. The lens in which I view things is vastly different now.
Far as physical health goes I’m starting to just focus on moving around. Maintaining whatever strength and energy I have (which most days is not a lot).
Currently battling with horrific depression, amidst infertility, and frequent check ups concerning the latest self harm episode. Not hopeless by any means, in Christ do I put my hope.
If anyone wants to know, Paradon was one of the few planets inhabited by Autobots that wasn’t destroyed by the cyber planet wars. Figured the name fits.
Current stats:
185lbs
Squat: 225
Bench:135
Deadlift: 185
OHP: 90
Roughly 2 years have gone by with me being completely absent from the gym. Month of September has been me feeling out where I am. Gauging whatever strength is still there, etc.
Going better, slowly. Finally approaching family planning, and im trying to stay level headed. Infertility has been such a heartbreak for me this year if im being honest.
Off all anti depressants which has been tough but rewarding. Left my corporate job. Have a part time gig as caregiver, mostly just getting comfortable with the house wife life now lol. Going back to school for some higher education learning. Hoping to expand more with the Psychology degree. But that switch from corporate working woman to housewife is like WOAH! Lol
My husband is having to remind me its okay if i just sit and drink coffee on the couch with the dogs all day till he comes home lol
Other than that just chilling with my husband. He’s been so kind and caring through A LOT.
