At least you get paid. I never shut up for free. Lol. So what does that end up being? Like 10% fulfilling and 90% frustrating?
Still Friday
2.5 mile hike with the dog.
@BethB, no just the opposite. I really like it, though occasionally it makes me sad and tired.
5 Likes
Well that’s good to hear!
1 Like
Side note: I am a huge fan of counseling. I went to an individual counselor when I was in my 20’s and it really helped me sort out my bag of cats brain. Then I went to marriage counseling in my early 40’s. I found that not only did it help my marriage, but it helped in a lot of the relationships in my life. Even my work relationships. Taught me how to effectively communicate. When I’m at work and someone is looking for advice I’m always like “well, I learned in marriage counseling (insert communication technique)” So I guess what I mean to say is thank you to you and the other therapists out there. Changed my life and helped turn my marriage into something amazing to be enjoyed rather than something miserable to be endured.
2 Likes
I’m so glad! There are so many things I find rewarding about my job. For one thing, we talk health/fitness and budgeting and parenting and everything-ing, which I like. I love to read and I love to share. I love quotes, and get to offer them all day long. I love laughing, and there’s a lot of that there. I have a number of clients who have been with me forever, but who are as bright and functional as I am, they just like having a sounding board. I’ve been on the other side of therapy and have experienced both tepid and life-changing results. I quote them sometimes in my own office, even the ones who weren’t able to help (marriage counseling). In fact, I talked about one this past week who used a “cup of stress” metaphor that was total bullshit and probably prolonged my 23 year marriage unnecessarily.
I love when people come in completely knotted and leave smiling, or even say “I’m so glad I had this today.” Some of the calls I get asking to come in reference “a friend who said” whatever lovely thing. I have a 15-year-old I’ve worked with off and on since she was 5, and her pediatrician begged me to let her in before she met the age requirement, saying “I promise, you’ll love her.” And I do! Her mother was in and out of jail throughout her childhood and now is apparently clean, but can’t maintain stable housing. Kiddo was taken into foster care with her 1st grade teacher, with whom she’s struggled because the teacher is such a worrywart mom. I don’t know how we got started on this, but our tradition is to start by popping a couple pieces each of my Bubblemint gum into our mouths. And then we chew while we talk. She’s turning into such a beautiful young woman, all confident-ish and thoughtful.
I’ll be glad when it’s time to retire because it IS heart wrenching and painful when it is. So much tragic stuff! I’ll also be SO glad to drop the alarm clock. But I do love it and get a lot of joy from it.
@SkyzykS I had a 25-year-old guy start last week who reminds me of you - he grew up in what sounds like the white-trash-est possible circumstances, with a father who lived in a dilapidated camper on the grandmother’s property in Alabama, as did an uncle, both drug addicts, and a mom who wandered around the country, failing one shitty job and shitty relationship after another, then uprooting the kids to go somewhere else to fail. His father died two weeks ago and the uncle who also lived at the grandmother’s 9 days prior to that. My kid was badly triggered by the trip home for the funeral. He saw his young half-sibs and described the woman taking care of them as “sidetracked,” but when I asked “like ADHD?” he said “no, worse than that.” And we left it there, but he dropped out of high school to take care of the two when they were babies and their mom went to jail or something. He has all kinds of guilt around not somehow rescuing them. His sister, 18, lives in Texas and when I asked what she does, he said “nothing.” He has what is considered locally to be a good job, working as a welder at a place that makes high end home decor, making $60K a year, and his live-in girlfriend is an oncological RN. But still, he said he wakes up every morning and the first thing he thinks about is how to change his mental state (weed and alcohol). He’s daily with both. He was tearful and at one point said “I feel small.” Shame, fear that he’s like them, survivors guilt…all of it. Frequently suicidal. He did walk in and take his GED without any trouble, which is good, and he’s thinking maybe self-employment as a trades guy to move ahead, as he’s topped out where he is, he thinks. It was all just heartbreaking.
But this is my jam, I guess, resilient kids. Thursday he disclosed that he gets two 24oz beers on his lunch break and then two more between work and his second job, and then goes to the bar after for what he described as 2-3 drinks but are doubles. So. I’ll need to cry over it at some point.
4 Likes
Hahaha, see how I like to talk? ^^^
1 Like
Lol. The only reason my posts are relatively short is because I am not 100% comfortable just yet. Just wait… I am often used as a benchmark of sorts. ie. OMG she talks more than Beth does! 
Can’t help it. I’ve tried. I love to talk and I love to laugh. Don’t know about you but I am a throw my head back and let out a bellowing laugh kind of girl. And a laugh till I’m crying and snorting girl. Nothing better.
1 Like
I also love to read. But it’s more on the spicy slightly porn side, so I’m careful who I share with. I also read a lot of fitness and motivational books, but they tend to be less spicy. But both give me ideas…
Laughing until you cry is the BEST!
I also snort occasionally. At work, with patients! Because life is really funny. What do you do for work?
1 Like
I am an ultrasound tech in high risk OB. I work at the local MFM.
1 Like
I’m cracking up holding two conversations with the same person at the same time on two different logs. I really think we might have a problem with the talking thing…
1 Like
I was laughing over it, too. 
1 Like
Saturday, August 30
Weight 147.2
CG Max day 32/50 - heel elevated squats, upright row, stability ball rollout, pullover, bulgarian lunge, diagonal raise - with 15 minute/1 mile cardio warmup. Great session! Husband was out hiking with the dog, so I didn’t have to worry about expectations that I would want to climb mountains later.
Progress pic…why do my muscles not show, like everyone else’s??
9 Likes
I’m gonna blame the camera.
1 Like
Poor guy. He never knew anything else. Thats probably a big source of fear and apprehension.
Actually, my one brother expressed similar feelings of guilt, coupled with knowledge that he had to escape to get himself away and out of the hole we lived in.
1 Like
Well, I can see some obliques and some guns in that pic.
2 Likes
For sure, and there’s definitely something to be said for lighting and a spray tan. lol
2 Likes
Some years back, when my grandfather passed, my wife suggested I go talk with someone. I did. A fellow about my age who’s goal was to get a job on a cruise ship giving marriage seminars. He asked me once how my childhood was. When I told him I was a heavy bag for my parents he told me we should not dwell on the past. So for a couple of years we talked about my feelings of job insecurity, my wife not wanting to leave rural Idaho for job offers in the wilds of Montana, fishing, and a curious story he told me about a singles trip he took to Las Vegas. He said he wanted a massage. So he walked into a massage business staffed with attractive Vietnamese women. After his massage he told me his masseuse offered him a variety of perks not listed on the menu. He told me he was horrified, paid for his massage and left. I thought two things, I did not get the whole story, and somehow our roles had reversed. I told a friend of mine who is a psychologist about my session. He told me to find a new counselor. I went back a few more times and decided I was fine. I never did find a different counselor. I have been fine since. I have to thank him for that. As I read your posts I wish I had found a counselor (looking back) who was as good as you appear to be. Keep up the work.
3 Likes
Heart to you for going through that and for sharing. The vulnerability will make a difference for others.
I too have been through a few counselors - some good, some not so good. The good ones are diamonds. I suspect Emily is a diamond.
3 Likes
Tuesday, September 2
CG Max day 33/50 - staggered RDL, flies, banded hip thrust, rear delt row - 5 minute cardio warmup. I wasn’t ready to wake up this morning, and the workout similarly felt like a grind. Weight is up after the holiday weekend.
8 Likes