I recently had a weight-loss surgery patient (think: stomach stapled) come into the VS I work at and hold out a piece of paper. She said “I need this.”
This is normal for me, people don’t know what they need but they know they need it. I couldn’t read her handwriting. She read it to me.
“I need a protein shake with…”
I started walking to the really foo-foo proteins while she talked.
“sixty grams of protein, between five to fifteen grams of carbs, no grams of fats, and LESS THAN TWO HUNDRED CALOGRAMS”
Yeah, she said calograms.
I did the numbers in my head, this “shake” was impossible. Assuming it was pure protein and nothing else, fifty grams of protein would fill her quota without the carbs. I checked a few bottles and did the math, we had nothing near that - always an errant carb or five to throw things off, even a gram of fat here and there. I eventually found her the best isolate we had - it wasn’t cheap - but it was 50g at 210kcal. She balked at the price then said “no, too many calograms and not enough of the protein.”
I really was baffled by this impossible protein - especially that a bariatric surgeon gave her this list. I assume he gives a similar breakdown to most of his patients, but am I retarded for thinking 1g protein = 4 calories always, or does some magical form of protein exist that breaks that rule?
[quote]Rocky2 wrote:
Well obviously she got the info from someone; hopefully not the doctor![/quote]
Well, the OP said the note was in HER handwriting, so it makes more sense that she was probably jotting down shit as the doctor spoke and messed up what she was writing trying to keep pace with the instructions.
Given that, I’m sure she didn’t write down the directions exactly as the surgeon laid them out (explaining this caloric “discrepancy”).
[quote]Nards wrote:
I think the woman saying “calograms” was just an icing on the cake. The OP is wondering about the protein the doctor was ordering.
[/quote]
Yeah, we know what he is wondering…but he is also ignoring that you can’t go by what was written down at all because the woman is clearly clueless and wrote it wrong…therefore, worrying about her specific “wants” is pointless. She doesn’t even understand what she needs.
The moment he added up the calories in the protein needed, it should have been clear as day what the real problem is…but he somehow blamed the doctor. That makes no sense.
[quote]Nards wrote:
I think the woman saying “calograms” was just an icing on the cake. The OP is wondering about the protein the doctor was ordering.
[/quote]
Yeah, we know what he is wondering…but he is also ignoring that you can’t go by what was written down at all because the woman is clearly clueless and wrote it wrong…therefore, worrying about her specific “wants” is pointless. She doesn’t even understand what she needs.
The moment he added up the calories in the protein needed, it should have been clear as day what the real problem is…but he somehow blamed the doctor. That makes no sense.[/quote]
I’m not ignoring the fact that she could have screwed up, but I was giving her the benefit of the doubt. I’ve resolved she is an idiot, but it still startles me. She was given a range, and I don’t see how 50 - 60 could have been so badly messed up but it had to have been or this bariatric surgeon is a spaz.
No offense to doctors X, jeez. Don’t gotta crucify me, I didn’t harp on any dentists or nothin’.
Had a guy today who had apparently recently read an article on E and suddenly became an expert on tocopherols, so he was reading all these bottles and was HORRIFIED that the VS brand of E would contain GLYCERIN. OH GOD. Except every other softgel of E in every concentration contained it too.
According to him, it sounded like “some nasty petroleum.”
Eventually he settled on a vegan E that was 10$ more for 1/3 the pills because it was “Vegetable Glycerin.”
[quote]CapnYousef wrote:
Had a guy today who had apparently recently read an article on E and suddenly became an expert on tocopherols, so he was reading all these bottles and was HORRIFIED that the VS brand of E would contain GLYCERIN. OH GOD. Except every other softgel of E in every concentration contained it too.
According to him, it sounded like “some nasty petroleum.”
Eventually he settled on a vegan E that was 10$ more for 1/3 the pills because it was “Vegetable Glycerin.”
[/quote]
Did you tell him that was absurd, or better yet that he had a slight case of the downs?
[quote]CapnYousef wrote:
Had a guy today who had apparently recently read an article on E and suddenly became an expert on tocopherols, so he was reading all these bottles and was HORRIFIED that the VS brand of E would contain GLYCERIN. OH GOD. Except every other softgel of E in every concentration contained it too.
According to him, it sounded like “some nasty petroleum.”
Eventually he settled on a vegan E that was 10$ more for 1/3 the pills because it was “Vegetable Glycerin.”
[/quote]
Did you tell him that was absurd, or better yet that he had a slight case of the downs?[/quote]
I rang him up and kicked him out because he walked in five minutes after closing.
My manager is a pushover when it comes to locking the door.
I have right under my eyes a sample of pre-op diet for a by-pass bariatric patient (Canada). Patient : woman, mid-40’s, 340 lb
Directions: Empty contents of one packet in 300 ml of cold water.
Daily doses: 4 packet
M…
Nutrition facts (Vanilla flavor):
230 Cal
Total fat 9 (mainly polyinsaturated)
Carbohydrate 16 g (fiber 3g)
Protein 22 g
If BMI > 50 = Boost diabetic, ready-to-drink, 4 x 237 ml (190 kcal/237 ml)
Additional foods allowed: 1 cup of steamed vegetables, 250 ml of fat-free chicken or beef broth, water, green tea or black coffee.
If you do maths, max 1000 Cal/day.
Post-op, 1200 cal until BMI = 25.
According to me, she could have screwed up.