Divorce Questions

Off Topic
1

Just throwing this out there for those who might have a similar experience (though I doubt many would!):

I was married in the summer of 2008…it lasted 4 months before she told me about, and followed through on moving out. We divided the assets that we accumulated together. We then filled out divorce papers and submitted them only to learn that we needed to be seperated for a year before we could divorce. No problem, we wait the year and do it again…

here is where it gets interesting…

On the day that we can re-submit the papers (one calendar year of seperation) I get an email. It states that being that we have been married 500 days and because no seperation agreement was filed out, she believes she is entitled to half and will be pursuing legal action to recieve said compensation…

Here are my thoughts and I would love to get some from the T-Nation

  1. Is it not implied that there was a division of accumulated assets when we did this when she moved out? (we divided all things we had accumulated when she left)

  2. Is it not implied that there is a seperation when we filed for divorce? (the divorce papers do have an agreed upon seperation date on them.

  3. Will both of these implications be legally binding in court?

Well T-Nation, I want to hear your opinion…discuss (and yes…I have sought legal counsel at this point).

AJ

2

I thought this was j-fit lol

3

It depends on the law in Canada. In most states in the US she would be entitled to 1/2 of any assets you acquired after you were married, but you would keep any assets you owned before the marriage.

4

It’s pay up time. I can’t understand how men let themselves be toyed with by women.

5

Bitch! 4 months, no kids (I assume), an agreement between the two of you based on mutually accumulated wealth and the divorce time technicality should be enough to get you off, unless you cheated or get a female judge. In which case Johnny Cockrin (sp) couldn’t win you an extra slice of pizza.

6

Fu-cking-hell.

Sorry, no advice - I just feel for you.

Good luck, man.

7

She can’t take half your shit if she’s dead.
.
…
…just sayin.

8

[quote]reddog6376 wrote:
It depends on the law in Canada. In most states in the US she would be entitled to 1/2 of any assets you acquired after you were married, but you would keep any assets you owned before the marriage.[/quote]

This is only half true. Depending on the total length of your marriage, asset division will differ. I have not been divorced, but I have been through 3 of my parents. From what I have seen, when a marriage reaches the 8-10 year period, almost all assets will be divided 50/50, as the relationship is considered long term. If a marriage lasts less than that minimum, you have a much better chance of keeping a better portion of your assets.

The minimum length of time for the marriage probably depends from state to state and from USA to Canada, but from what I have seen, I would say that you stand a very very good chance since your marriage was so short.

9

[quote]reddog6376 wrote:
It depends on the law in Canada. In most states in the US she would be entitled to 1/2 of any assets you acquired after you were married, but you would keep any assets you owned before the marriage.[/quote]

Possibly up to the separation date. If OP’s looking at a significant amount of assets, maybe he should consult a divorce attorney instead of the internet.

10

[quote]pushmepullme wrote:

[quote]reddog6376 wrote:
It depends on the law in Canada. In most states in the US she would be entitled to 1/2 of any assets you acquired after you were married, but you would keep any assets you owned before the marriage.[/quote]

Possibly up to the separation date. If OP’s looking at a significant amount of assets, maybe he should consult a divorce attorney instead of the internet.[/quote]

Yea that would be the best bet, it is definitely worth it to pay for a good attorney now so your not paying for a bad settlement later.

11

People are so fucking messed up its unbelievable.

12

Nothing is ever implied.

Agreements must be explicit and succinct.

Thats not law, just common sense.

13

[quote]ActionJackson wrote:

  1. Is it not implied that there was a division of accumulated assets when we did this when she moved out? (we divided all things we had accumulated when she left)

  2. Is it not implied that there is a seperation when we filed for divorce? (the divorce papers do have an agreed upon seperation date on them.

  3. Will both of these implications be legally binding in court?

Well T-Nation, I want to hear your opinion…discuss (and yes…I have sought legal counsel at this point).

AJ[/quote]

If you have legal counsel, I’m sure they can answer your 3 questions much better than us. Our opinion, well, doesn’t mean shit. IN MY OPINION, she shouldn’t get a nickel you earned after the day of legal separation, and vice versa. But that doesn’t mean that is legal law in your Province. It is the case in my State (Arizona).

Good luck man.

14

One other quick recommendation. Until you get a complete consult from your attorney, avoid any major financial decisions, such as the purchase of a vehicle. The last thing you want to do is buy a $30,000 vehicle today and find out she owns half of it next week.

15

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:
Nothing is ever implied.

Agreements must be explicit and succinct.

Thats not law, just common sense.

[/quote]

not exactly true. I see what you mean but implied terms play a huge part in contractual law (what we have here is dealing with a contract (aka agreement/seperation) and have a large bearing on misrepresentation, mistake of contract or voiding of any agreement what-so-ever.

O.P. Try laying everything you know and have recieved out in some kind of file and coherent manner and see what makes sense. Definately consult a law professional once you yourself have the details sorted out.

I feel for you in this situation and i know from experience the system does not treat the male party with equality and fairness.

Good luck.

16

First and foremost get some legal advice. Number two can we get some more info on this? How come it only lasted 4 months, how long have you known her, why did you decide to get a divorce? You could always refuse to divorce her and force her ass to marital therapy. There are a few loopholes that will turn the tables on her, if you can afford a good lawyer. Does she have any kind of money? How much you got to lose? Some background on you and her would be nice. But it really comes down to how much you got to lose and how come she changed her mind on this when you both thought about settling this the grown up way. Or is she just a slut? And out of curiosity why didn’t do a prenup?

17

Your problem reminds me of a joke.

Why is divorce so fucking expensive? Because it is worth it.

My advice to you is:

  1. Consult an attorney.
  2. Avoid any major purchases until you consult with your attorney. As noted above, any debt or assets that you acquire while married are usually considered shared property. If the purchase is necessary, have her sign a quit claim deed in advance.
  3. Do a CBA before you start chasing after trivial possessions. No reason to pay an attorney $100+/hr to chase after a $50 toaster.
  4. Keep your contact with the future ex to a minimum. You two have already reached an agreement on a division of assets. If the law is on your side and he thinks that you stand a good chance of getting a judge to agree with you - go before the judge. Otherwise, you end up paying an attorney $100+/hr to mail who knows how many letters to your future ex dividing up stupid shit. Been down that road. Either go before the judge or let her have it. No couch is worth being tied to a gold-digging whore like that. NOT EVEN IF IT IS ITALIAN LEATHER!
  5. Try to convince her to have a “one last time” and stick it in her pooper.
18

Here is the background:

-prenuptual…hmmm great idea in retrospect!!!

-4 months of marriage, she decided to move out for unknown reasons (unless “I dont know” is a valid reason)

-No cheating (as far as I know or care) although at this point I am dating someone else and she has admitted to several relationships

-She refused marriage counselling

-Refused any sort of seperation agreement. I tried to sit down with her and draw out the terms on an informal basis (I threw out the notes from our conversation when I thought the divorce was going through), which I obviously could not prove in court. She was not straight with me at all, she posted her single status on facebook prior to letting me know that we were not trying to make it work and began posting all her single “adventures” on facebook (in retrospect I should have kept her on as a facebook friend and kept all this info as evidence!!!)

-She was gone so quickly that there would have only been an accumulation of debt (other than wedding presents and cash that were already divided), including the financing of a 40,000 car under my name (in her posession, she makes the payments but carries a significantly larger debt load than its worth and it is a hit on my credit)

-Mutually Signed divorce papers for a no contest divorce (which were denied on the basis of less than 1 year, didnt know that was necessary when submitted)

-I would never return to the relationship even if there was a significant (read ANY amount) amount of financial gain to be had

-in the midst of the email that I recieved threatening to take my assets and stating that she is taking legal action is an option to try the relationship again (after her refusal to consider this right from the start), a little remorse pehaps…

-She never had to pay a bill/mortgage payment in her short time with me

-I only correspond with her via email (so that I have writeen record of what has been said)and on an extremely limited basis (as in only if I must contact her)

I am in the process of retaining legal counsel, I am just waiting for an appointment with the extremely busy lawyer who I want to represent me…

I am very willing to say that this split is the best thing that ever happened to me, probably saved me from eventual physical, mental, emotional and financial ruin…

If I have learned anything from this, it is that once the little voice in your head starts to send you warning signals #1 listen to then, and #2 keep a record of everything that goes on in your life if it could later be helpful for you. If I had kept a fraction of the written material, printed off text messages, kept emails and recorded our conversations…none of this would be happening. If I had just brought out a recorder and set it on the kitchen table for our conversations I would be in a very different spot right now…protect yourself first, because in the end we can only truly rely on ourselves.

Have a great week all!!!

AJ

19

My very expensive divorce lawyer was the best investment I ever made.

20

point well taken reddog…as soon as I got her email I was directly on the phone to my parents to find out the name of their pricey law office to contact one of their divorce lawyers…I am by no means taking this lightly