Oh, I am a firm believer that the ascetic monk’s life is the peak of mental bliss for men.
Have you ever seen an unhappy Buddhist monk?
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I guess I always just felt better by literally going to do something. Not talking about stuff while doing stuff.
Like I don’t talk to people at the gym but the gym makes me feel better - it’s been my therapy for half my life.
IDK maybe I’m just weird 
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Not weird. I didn’t talk to anyone for many years and I am pretty sure fighting the iron is only thing that kept me from hurting myself for a period of about 6 years.
(I am on the autism spectrum though…don’t know how much that factors into it).
The talking happens naturally if you are doing stuff with other men. It may not be mushy “share your feelings young padawan” type talk, but you also aren’t going to sit in silence with someone.
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I’m trying to catch up with work stuff but just wanted to pop in and tell you guys how much I appreciate all the thoughtful comments about mental health and men. Wow. Great insights!
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Do you seek solitude in other ways too? I like to differentiate between solitude and loneliness.
I love putting down my hood, earplugs in, and doing a nice long weld. It could be 100°, wearing full gear in the blazing sun because for me, thats solitude.
Loneliness though-I could be sitting next to my wife, feeling like she doesn’t understand or care. Its more like being isolated and disconnected.
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Idk if i necessarily seek it, it’s more like I’m comfortable with it. On occasion I’ll feel that i need space but usually not the case.
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Yeah! It can be hard to find. Some people read, some find it in the gym, etc. For me, being very much an introvert, its like a recharge. I love it.
On the other hand, sitting in a hospital bed late December of 2020, not allowed visitors, fasted for surgey and being told I would be there for another week- was the depth of lonliness. Scared, vulnerable, in heart failure. Completely devastating. Hated it.
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It’s hard even to read this - makes me feel panicky.
Going back to the connection between trauma and training, I know that for me, vulnerable is very, very difficult. I have trouble trusting anyone more than maybe 90%, so I need to be in top condition for whatever comes. My trauma was primarily my parents’ abdications of that role, so I don’t train to be strong and fierce, but I do need to be able to take care of myself and imagining being unable to do so terrifies me.
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Every last comment here has been really informative. Thank you all for stopping by!
This approach may be helpful for a lot of people whether they realize it or not. Being productive on a task that’s completely unrelated to the thing you’re struggling with seems incredibly valuable. It reminds me of the “flow” state.
I can’t pronounce this guy’s name, but Chris introduced me to his ideas about the meditative nature of flow: Mihály Csíkszentmihályi.
And maybe that explains why people get hooked on exercise or anything somewhat meditative. Runners are really good at that. They literally get to run away from their problems, let their brain work through it, and apply themselves to something stimulating for a while.
We probably all do that with lifting too. My brain seems to go to a different place while getting a good workout.
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Today’s Workout… was brought to me by the musical genius of Paula Abdul.
Superset
- A1. Seated Row
- A2. Bent Over Rear Delt Lateral Raise
Superset
- B1. T-Bar Row
- B2. Dips
Straight set
- Machine Lateral Raise
EMOM
- Abs
Pre-fatigue and Late 80s Pop
I can’t say enough about the power of pre-fatiguing a muscle with an isolation lift before doing a compound lift. It basically turned the seated neutral-grip cable row into a shoulder exercise, which is bizarre since it usually just hits my mid back and part of the rear delts. So I started with a very light bent over row and used a partial mid-range for a gazillion smooth, non-stop reps until the burn was unbearable.
From there, I super-setted the two exercises: Seated cable row + bent over lateral raise. And my shoulders were on FIRE.
Now, yes, when most people do rows, they’re trying to hit the back. But my back is the most developed part of my body and when women see it they think, “ew bulky,” so I’m fine with sacrificing some back work for some delt work. Especially since I’m still avoiding those overhead positions because of that shoulder impingement (which feels healed, I’m just playing it safe).
So rows that become a shoulder exercise are awesome.
Regardless of what anyone thinks about late 80s pop, this is an amazing workout song. I wasn’t able to fully appreciate it back in the day because I was only 5 when it was a hit.
And another thing…
If you ever come to my house and try to take a nap on the loveseat in my office, this is what will happen.
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Don’t tempt me.
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OOOH mi casa es su casa! 
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Never thought I would read that sentence, made me smile, Thanks
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Pictures of the tiny pooch (and inheritance not a choice, but now loved and part of the family!):
We had two but unfortunately this guy (much more reasonably sized) had to be put down not too long ago:
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Oh I just want to snuggle that precious pup and squish her widdle face!!
Sorry to hear about your other furry guy. But I’m glad he got to have an amazing life as part of your family. 
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Well that makes two of us. Never thought I’d say it! 
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Fact: If a bunch of hippos gang up on a gator, the hippos will win.
But what about a one-on-one fight between a gator and a hippo?
I expected this video to answer that question, but it did not.
I feel like these were two different hippo-gator encounters edited together to deceive us. So who wins in a fair hippo-gator fight?
Today’s Workout
- Abs
- 20 minutes stationary bike intervals
- LISS
I’m not sure that the intervals were actually fruitful. I just get inflamed and phlegmy. And that last part is really intrusive when recording a voiceover. I talk like an elderly smoker and can’t clear my throat. And this goes on for hours after the workout with the potential inclusion of lung/throat pain the day after.
There’s also the option of LISS (low intensity steady state) cardio but I do that every day just walking the dogs. So going to the gym just for that doesn’t seem appealing but maybe I should get over it. Because walking dogs it’s probably not real cardio if you have to stop every time your floofer has to sniff or pee on something, and that’s basically every five steps.
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one of the deadliest animals in the wild
Hippo…
Hippos will also kill lions
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I, for one, think this counts. If it’s too easy, just throw a backpack on.
Why do you have to go to the gym? Just bored?
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This is exactly what I needed to see! Hippos blow my mind. I always assumed that an animal that big wouldn’t move so fast. But it does! And it’s just as violent as all the other predators. Incredible video. Thank you!