Dani's Rebel Log

This doesn’t apply to chocolates, but as someone who loves cooking (although not a chef like @Brant_Drake), the unhealthy recipes are more fun to make. There is more latitude for playing with flavours and textures

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I’m literally making ice cream and cupcakes for a client right now. If I hadn’t discovered working out before I got into cooking I’d be 400 lbs or so.

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Absolutely true. “No” is a hard word for me. And if I do say it, I feel the need to explain myself which is a sign of a people pleaser. I’ve heard the saying, “No” is a complete sentence, but for some reason it feels abrasive to me.

And I think there are some people who take advantage of that. When they hear a quick, “no thanks, I’m good” it’s like an invitation to keep applying the pressure. It’s as if they don’t believe me or they think I really do want the food but I’m too scared to eat it. So they think they’re doing me a favor by giving me permission to eat it.

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Oh I bet!

That makes sense! I actually do love eating things people have made themselves because that is more significant and meaningful to me. When someone I love put time and effort into making something, it’s special. So I would eat your delicious food, girlfriend.

But when a person is trying to force-feed me a manufactured product that holds no significance, it’s just uncomfortable.

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I’m sure they’re amazing. :smiling_face:

I hope you do!

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I tell my clients to just graciously thank the person for thinking of you/offering, and then be honest as to why they don’t want what’s offered - it conflicts with goal, not hungry, just ate, saving room for something else, etc. If none of that works, just politely request that they stop asking because the answer isn’t going to change and if that makes the “food-pusher” end a friendship or judge you because you didn’t eat a chocolate - well, that tells you everything you need to know about the person.

I think that many times, the “food-pushers” are on a mission (potentially unbeknownst to them) to either sabotage the person they’re pressuring or just to make themselves feel better about their less than optimal choices.

Long story short - you should never eat anything for anyone else’s approval. You just do you and own and be proud of your choices! They aren’t the boss of you. lol

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These are such simple, honest answers.

And I love this addition. I’m definitely using it next time. Thank you for helping me figure out a script!

This makes a lot more sense now.

WOW. I seriously needed this and am going to jot it down in my journal.

I might have some type of social-food-related anxiety. Food alone doesn’t make me anxious. Being social rarely makes me anxious.

But combining the two is often what does it. And I’m kind of protective of my diet right now because of having a recent flare-up a few weeks ago that caused a lot of digestive problems. I’m better, but just feeling a little touchy about it. Like, now is not the time to throw caution to the wind. Thank you so much for the insightful response!

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I’m so happy to have been able to help you! In my profession, this is just another “day at office” situation. Lol.

And if you ever want to chat, like real time, about food stuff just let me know. I REALLY like to talk and if someone will listen, I am there for it. Lol

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That is amazing. You basically just solved a conundrum I’ve had for at least two decades.

Awww yeah! I’d love that! Also, come to Colorado. We have a guest room ready for you!

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Raises hand in the back of the class.

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I do get this but as I like to see the good in most people I am going to say that I also think at times it is just a case of people being nice or polite. I will tell my wife I am cutting out sugar and carbs for a month and she will still ask me if I want a cookie with my coffee every single time. Pretty sure she would be happy for me to lose a little weight and stop snoring like a train, so don’t think she is trying to sabotage me either knowingly or unknowingly.

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That makes me think it may also be habitual. Spouses can forget when we’re switching up our diets, so they’ll offer the stuff they always offer… especially if they’re nurturers. In that case it’s sweet. But in other cases it can get a bit obnoxious.

This is spot on. Funniest thing is my wife is very nurturing but my kids are brutal. She will ask, are you having potatoes with your dinner and before I can answer one of my kids will answer ‘no mum he’s too fat’

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WHAT?! You sir, are nowhere near fat. :joy:

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Yer but my family are all so slim, especially the kids it is all relative. Compared to them I am like a life sized Care bear.

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Haha I know the feeling. Not in my family, but just in general.

Positive, considerate, fun, kind, and huggable? That’s a winning combination right there.

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I was more thinking this guy. LOL

image

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My spirit animal!

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Quad Queen & the others pretty much nailed everything I would have added, even including the subtle motive of having someone to share in their bad decisions- eating buddy->drinking buddy.

I take a lot of offers for things I should avoid as an effort to be accomodating. With that in mind, I try to be polite and respectful so that their attempts to accomodate aren’t taken as rejectjion.

Being a sensitive type (no! Not kidding, I really do care what people think!) I’ve used A truth, but not necessarily The truth to deflect. Like, when I cut trees, people would always offer us booze. Cuz high risk + chainsaws and machines that eat people = “of course you want to get sauced!”.

So I’d tell a truth- like “If we get hurt under the influence, our insurer will reject the claim.” Or other similarly acceptable things that are true, but don’t come off as flat out rejection.

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