I’ve spent most of my fitness experience around bulking and getting strong and never tried to lose weight before. I never even considered going into a caloric deficit. This post is in regards to my wife, who isn’t as experienced with weight training and does a lot of cardio.
She’s 140 and active, but only eats 1400 calories. She’s frustrated that she doesn’t lose weight, but I think shes heavily under eating, because I calculated her calories to be 2100 with her activity level. It’s out of question for her and she won’t even consider eating that much, and says she doesn’t have the appetite to do so.
I’m trying to get the right arguments to get her to eat more.
I’m trying to say that she won’t gain weight if she eats at maintenance, even if it’s more than she’s eating now - would this be accurate?
What are the actual hormonal issues going on? I understand not eating enough can lead to cortisol build up, which can make it hard to lose weight. Could not eating properly lead to thyroid issues?
Is starvation mode a real thing? Will somebody retain body fat if they’re not eating enough? or is this bro science?
She runs 4-5 miles 2x a week, and lifts 3x a week. She’s not working out with me (we live apart because she’s in school), and isn’t as comfortable with big lifts without me.
I got her doing an old timey Squats and Milk routine:
1x20 Squats with adding weight every session
1x20 Straight arm lat pulldown (instead of the original dumbbell pullover)
Dumbbell OHP 3x10
Lat Pulldown 3x10
And whatever else she wants to do before/after
And obese people never eat. It is a mystery to them how they got fat.
Unless you are with her 100% of the time you do not know how much she is eating. Her meals MAY be as small as you say but, she may be cheating and/or snacking.
If you aren’t there, how do you know that she’s actually doing any of it? Dietary/exercise noncompliance is totally a real thing.
Just my observation, but many women are very under muscled and really just don’t burn many calories.
My wife used to ask why she would gain weight on relatively light caloric intake. My answer was 1. You only have enough muscle to support your activities. (Homeostasis) 2. You’re not very active.
Think of this from her perspective. She’s busted her ass to get where she is and she has probably struggled the most with the last 5lbs.
Now fatty* over here is telling her that she needs to eat more. The idea that she might lose the ground she has fought the hardest for is going to be hard to swallow. Especially coming from you who (a) is her husband [you’re not to talk lol] (b) has zero credibility because you’re a fatty*
If I were you, I’d stay out of it until your help is asked for. Then if asked, ask her what she’s tried and try come around to the possibility of eating more.
*When I say fatty, I just mean your goal isn’t weight loss
Yeah true on both counts. She’s really new to lifting so I’m sure she hasnt really developed what she needs to burn calories.
She asked me this morning how she was eating only 1400 calories and not losing weight, and my suggestion was to eat more. Maybe I’ll gain some credibility with her when I cut weight for my meet!
Hopefully she can get more comfortable with heavier weights. She went from only being comfortable with goblet squats to preferring barbell squats, but only does 75 without supervision. She’s done 145x3 with me in her first month of working out with me.
There’s that, but a whole lot of the calories burned are done by doing.
An example would be when I was doing concrete labor. On average I was burning about 400 calories per hour running wheelbarrows of concrete, busting stuff with a 16 lb. sledge, loading broken stuff into the truck or bobcat, etc.plus trying to eat enough to lift and grow. Total daily to grow was 6k+ @ 160 lbs. and low body fat.
Now look at a relatively sedentary female student that might have 100-110 lbs. lbm.
It goes against the grain a bit, but I don’t see much wrong with extended cardio, like an hour plus, or maybe a 6 or 7 hour hike on the weekends if you bring some water and lite snacks, especially if the goal is weight loss. Its not like a person is depleted and trying to balance fatigue management with caloric restriction like a BB’r prepping for a contest.
So an increase in activity is Not a solution to a somewhat sedentary lifestyle?
Substantiate your statement a little of you’re going to shoot mine down. Fwiw I’m not talking out of my ass or from a textbook, and often do 6-8 hr. hikes, and have done decades of cycling.
So how is it not sustainable or addressing the “root” issue?
I’m not sure what the “root issue” is here. I think it ultimately comes down to her training age/experience and knowledge of what works for her.
Like others have said, maybe my approach should just be empathy rather than problem solving. We both enjoy fitness and she’ll continue to lift, so I’m sure she can figure it out first hand through trial and error.
She’s already working out 5x per week. Upping cardio isn’t the best option for increasing daily expenditure since it tends to lead to a less than optimal hormonal environment for a lean body composition and it loses its effects over time.
I’m not saying what you do isn’t sustainable for you. For the average person slapping more work onto their current routine usually doesn’t work. It’s much easier to change the activity within their current schedule.
