Great minds think alike. But so do sheeple.
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I wonder what genius came up with the idea of gravy in the first place.
“I have everything I need to make bread, but I also have a dirty pan and want to put in zero effort.”
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I have texture issues. I don’t eat creamy white stuff. At all. Ever. EXCEPT I like to put mayonnaise in tuna and eat it with saltines. Mayo on anything else makes me gag. No idea why it’s different with tuna.
Edit: I remembered I actually prefer Miracle Whip
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I’m with you.
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It correlates with the same people that thought “you know what this wonderful piece of meat needs? To have all of it’s moisture removed” and then needed a solution to the new problem they created.
And I third Miracle Whip being the superior condiment, despite being a chemical crapstorm.
Because I have an allergic reaction to unanswered questions paired with a tendency to think I’m funny, I spent the morning rabbit-holing about gravy.
The answer is the invention of ceramics.
@T3hPwnisher and all cooking nerds who read textbooks for fun, chapter 4 has some fun stuff.
And yes, there is a Domino’s pizza box in the background. Mom is out of town on a business trip so I gave the kids a yes day.
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It’s basically the red-headed stepchild of mayo and coleslaw dressing, so just stir a little extra vinegar, honey, mustard, and garlic powder/paprika to whatever healthy mayo you prefer.
Boom. Miracle.
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The real genius was the guy who first obtained milk. What sort of psycho looks at a cow and thinks “I’ll bet their udder fluid is refreshing and delicious”?
Ceramics? “Sure. I’ve made a cute little boat out of fine China. But how can I casually show it off to people during our next feast?”.
Titties.
It’s not that complicated.
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It’s not complicated. But it’s also not like you make ice cream out of breast milk (one hopes). And don’t dogs also have titties too?
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Cold case sushi. Actually raw too, cuz screw it. I’m already in a hospital. If it all goes wrong I’m 2 floors and 1 hallway away from the emergency dept. 
Actually Dr. recommended. He was right. It was good!
@DoesTheHeavyLifting I blame you. You mentioned Japanese fatty tuna sushi and the seed was planted.
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That meal always sucks.
She’s going to do well.
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I’ve had worse. “Dad is dead” pizza fucking sucked.
“Jims spinal chord is severed most of the way through” vending machine coffee.
“You were poisoned with drano” orange juice was the worst though. If I didn’t have so little blood in my drugstream I’d have probably been pretty upset about that.
Yeah. By all accounts, she’s holding up very well. 
.
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I found out the “fresh” salmon they sold at a local grocer had previously been quick frozen beforehand soon after catch. So I started buying that and making cheap churashi with wasabi mayo, soy, rice vinegar, sushi rice and furikake. Super easy and delicious, no talent required. Much safer - and cheaper - than I might have guessed. But if they sold good fatty tuna here I’d use that.
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This is important for people to know. It’s all frozen on the boat before it’s shipped to stores. You’re just paying extra for it to be defrosted.
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Well that’s annoying. And a helpful tidbit.
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An interesting article, thanks. In my ignorance I might have considered salmon an oily fish.
I usually think of fish with clearly defined fat deposits like salmon, as “fatty” fish, but fish with a more liquid fat distribution as “oiley.” Like mackerel or sardines.
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