[quote]sufiandy wrote:
Chuck Norris secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result.[/quote]
LOL! Never heard that one.
[quote]BodyByGame20 wrote:
um…Bruce beat Chuck in Way of The Dragon. There is no Enter The Dragon 2, at least not with Bruce Lee.
What is the last thing you hear before a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick? No one knows, dead men tell no tales.[/quote]
That was it. You’re Chuck Norris…I mean correct.
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this “a slow Tuesday.”
When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
Chuck Norris fell asleep at the wheel once. When he woke up he had won the Indy 500.
Chuck Norris played the lead part in a 3rd grade school production of Oliver Twist. He got all the porridge he wanted, along with a new bike and a Stretch Armstrong.
As a child, Chuck Norris played Hungry Hungry Hippos with real hippos.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
[quote]bilj wrote:
Squiggles wrote:
nomorewar wrote:
Heracles_rocks wrote:
heracles chucks chuck norris out the door like yesterday’s old news.
fuck you!!
hurcales is not worthy enough to orally clean chucks underwear…
Chuck Norris gives freddy cugar nightmares
ghosts tell “chuck norris stories” at night
You guys do realize that it’s spelled ‘Hercules’, right.
Heracles - Roman name Hercules. Heracles was the most famous of the Greek mythological heroes.
You do realize what Google.com is there for, right?[/quote]
And ‘hurcales’ falls in there where? Also, don’t hit the submit button twice, doubt posts are annoying.
Chuck Norris was have a threesome in the cab of his truck. He pulled out and blasted his load all over the dashboard. We now call that truck Optimus Prime.
[quote]Squiggles wrote:
bilj wrote:
Squiggles wrote:
nomorewar wrote:
Heracles_rocks wrote:
heracles chucks chuck norris out the door like yesterday’s old news.
fuck you!!
hurcales is not worthy enough to orally clean chucks underwear…
Chuck Norris gives freddy cugar nightmares
ghosts tell “chuck norris stories” at night
You guys do realize that it’s spelled ‘Hercules’, right.
Heracles - Roman name Hercules. Heracles was the most famous of the Greek mythological heroes.
You do realize what Google.com is there for, right?
And ‘hurcales’ falls in there where? Also, don’t hit the submit button twice, doubt posts are annoying.[/quote]
Might want to ask the bad speller where they pulled that one from.
Yes i meant the greek version Heracles.
To play along with the game, here’s an old one.
Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower
Once just by looking at someone, Chuck Norris scared them so bad they shit a hole in the back of their pants. Embarrassed they moved to Scotland and changed their name to Jack Urboady.
When children go to sleep they check the closet for the Boogie Man. When the Boogie Man goes to sleep, he checks the closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris’ tears can cure any illness but Chuck Norris has never cried.
^ has chuck norris as his avatar
Chuck Norris wears a toupee.
^^^ start running… now!
Chuck Norris doesn’t curl in the squat rack, he curls with the squat rack.
In the eyes of a ranger.
We all know the magic word is, “please”. As in, “please don’t kill me, chuck norris”. too bad Chuck Norris doesn’t believe in magic.
It is considered gay for a man not to be attracted to chuck norris.
chuck norris won a starring contest against his reflection.
chuck norris once fucked a girl in florida. He was in california.
chuck norris can sneeze with his eyes open .
Chuck hits so hard, he can knock the wet out of water.
When Chuck Norris does pushups, he does not push his body up but pushes the earth down.
After finishing barbell curls Chuck Norris lifted the bar off the ground to return to the rack, he now holds the raw powerlifting world record.
Someone once mistaked Chuck Norris only squatting 135lbs when in fact he was leg pressing the Earth minus 135lbs.
A blind man was walking down the street one day and accidentally stepped on Chuck Norris’ foot. “My Foot…” Chuck Norris said. At the sound of Chuck Norris’ voice, the blind man was instantly cured, and could see; but, the first, last, and only thing he ever saw was a perfectly executed roundhouse to the face.
