[quote]angry chicken wrote:
[quote]Arem wrote:
"Can I get you a drink?
-“sorry I have a boyfriend”
“What? I said you look like a slut”[/quote]
Reminds me of this one (works best in a club where you’re shouting to talk):
Bro- “Hey, do you wanna dance?”
Her- “umm, No?” or <<>>
Bro- “NO, I said, ‘you look fat in those pants!!’”[/quote]
HA!
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
Fill this thread will “comments”:
Bro-bby Budnick said…
I went to a stupidass sorority date party once. I got wasted, grinded on sluts all night, then got some ass. In between that, I did something awesome.
So, after the party... I get back at my slutty date's apartment and we start messing around. I realize I have to shit and bad enough that I just cant hold it. I tell her I need to "get ready" in the bathroom, so she excuses me...
When I enter the bathroom, I see the toilet. Obviously this would be most people's choice, but not mine. I also see a bath tub, with the shower curtain pulled shut. I open the curtain, sit on the side of the tub, and shit all over it. I'm so fucking pumped at this point and laughing my ass off that I can hardly keep quiet. When I finish, I close the curtain, wipe my ass, and head out to her room to fuck the shit out of her.
The next morning she sees it, I hear her, and I immediately start thinking, "oh shit". Little did I know, when we came back and were having loud animal sex, her roommate was already passed out in the next bedroom. I guess she was so wasted that night (she wasnt at the date party), that she didnt remember what she did. So she apologized for shitting in the tub. So fucking funny.
My last night ever at school, I banged this girl again. Right before I blew it on her face, I asked if she remembered when her roommate shit in the tub. She replied "Yea, why?" and then I told her it was me as I blew on her face. I just put my pants on & left.
Dumb slut. With a shitty tub. [/quote]
This is just too much bro for me to handle.
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
shaquille Bro’neil said…
Last formal I went to, I took two different slam pieces to pound town in one evening. The second one knew I already banged the first one, but thats what happens to bras when you let them get dressed up, they get moist.
in all seriousness, real bro's don't need a special event to get laid. It's what we do best.
oh, and... liking dave matthews is as straight as an eight.
80's tunes is bro music. play that noise on the reg.[/quote]
The rugby formals I go to aren’t about getting laid, they’re about getting as drunk as possible and causing sheer insanity.
[quote]DickBag wrote:
…
fuckin cuntcha!!
…[/quote]
ha! I would have spelled it “ya fuckin cunt ya” but yours works better, especially because they way you’ve written it, it makes no sense.
(This was my dad’s favourite phrase, directed at everyone from the cop pulling him over to the empty milk jug in the fridge)
[quote]schultzie wrote:
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
Fill this thread will “comments”:
Bro-bby Budnick said…
I went to a stupidass sorority date party once. I got wasted, grinded on sluts all night, then got some ass. In between that, I did something awesome.
So, after the party... I get back at my slutty date's apartment and we start messing around. I realize I have to shit and bad enough that I just cant hold it. I tell her I need to "get ready" in the bathroom, so she excuses me...
When I enter the bathroom, I see the toilet. Obviously this would be most people's choice, but not mine. I also see a bath tub, with the shower curtain pulled shut. I open the curtain, sit on the side of the tub, and shit all over it. I'm so fucking pumped at this point and laughing my ass off that I can hardly keep quiet. When I finish, I close the curtain, wipe my ass, and head out to her room to fuck the shit out of her.
The next morning she sees it, I hear her, and I immediately start thinking, "oh shit". Little did I know, when we came back and were having loud animal sex, her roommate was already passed out in the next bedroom. I guess she was so wasted that night (she wasnt at the date party), that she didnt remember what she did. So she apologized for shitting in the tub. So fucking funny.
My last night ever at school, I banged this girl again. Right before I blew it on her face, I asked if she remembered when her roommate shit in the tub. She replied "Yea, why?" and then I told her it was me as I blew on her face. I just put my pants on & left.
Dumb slut. With a shitty tub. [/quote]
This is just too much bro for me to handle.[/quote]
I’ll give that bro his props. That was pretty fucking bro.
Closest thing I got is leaving an upper decker at some Sorostitute house then getting dome from one of them later that evening.
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
[quote]schultzie wrote:
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
Fill this thread will “comments”:
Bro-bby Budnick said…
I went to a stupidass sorority date party once. I got wasted, grinded on sluts all night, then got some ass. In between that, I did something awesome.
So, after the party... I get back at my slutty date's apartment and we start messing around. I realize I have to shit and bad enough that I just cant hold it. I tell her I need to "get ready" in the bathroom, so she excuses me...
When I enter the bathroom, I see the toilet. Obviously this would be most people's choice, but not mine. I also see a bath tub, with the shower curtain pulled shut. I open the curtain, sit on the side of the tub, and shit all over it. I'm so fucking pumped at this point and laughing my ass off that I can hardly keep quiet. When I finish, I close the curtain, wipe my ass, and head out to her room to fuck the shit out of her.
The next morning she sees it, I hear her, and I immediately start thinking, "oh shit". Little did I know, when we came back and were having loud animal sex, her roommate was already passed out in the next bedroom. I guess she was so wasted that night (she wasnt at the date party), that she didnt remember what she did. So she apologized for shitting in the tub. So fucking funny.
My last night ever at school, I banged this girl again. Right before I blew it on her face, I asked if she remembered when her roommate shit in the tub. She replied "Yea, why?" and then I told her it was me as I blew on her face. I just put my pants on & left.
Dumb slut. With a shitty tub. [/quote]
This is just too much bro for me to handle.[/quote]
I’ll give that bro his props. That was pretty fucking bro.
Closest thing I got is leaving an upper decker at some Sorostitute house then getting dome from one of them later that evening.[/quote]
Thats pretty bro of you bro.
My old roommate and I (he’s a super bro too) slayed these two slam pieces who lived together. We both ended up finishing around the same time, then before we left he unscrewed their toilet seat and took it with us hahah! We were like, hope ya like a soggy butt sluts!
Sick playlists, sports, women, and all the news and stories a bro needs to see.
Just bro out, bro.
[quote]SickAbs wrote:
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
[quote]schultzie wrote:
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
Fill this thread will “comments”:
Bro-bby Budnick said…
I went to a stupidass sorority date party once. I got wasted, grinded on sluts all night, then got some ass. In between that, I did something awesome.
So, after the party... I get back at my slutty date's apartment and we start messing around. I realize I have to shit and bad enough that I just cant hold it. I tell her I need to "get ready" in the bathroom, so she excuses me...
When I enter the bathroom, I see the toilet. Obviously this would be most people's choice, but not mine. I also see a bath tub, with the shower curtain pulled shut. I open the curtain, sit on the side of the tub, and shit all over it. I'm so fucking pumped at this point and laughing my ass off that I can hardly keep quiet. When I finish, I close the curtain, wipe my ass, and head out to her room to fuck the shit out of her.
The next morning she sees it, I hear her, and I immediately start thinking, "oh shit". Little did I know, when we came back and were having loud animal sex, her roommate was already passed out in the next bedroom. I guess she was so wasted that night (she wasnt at the date party), that she didnt remember what she did. So she apologized for shitting in the tub. So fucking funny.
My last night ever at school, I banged this girl again. Right before I blew it on her face, I asked if she remembered when her roommate shit in the tub. She replied "Yea, why?" and then I told her it was me as I blew on her face. I just put my pants on & left.
Dumb slut. With a shitty tub. [/quote]
This is just too much bro for me to handle.[/quote]
I’ll give that bro his props. That was pretty fucking bro.
Closest thing I got is leaving an upper decker at some Sorostitute house then getting dome from one of them later that evening.[/quote]
Thats pretty bro of you bro.
My old roommate and I (he’s a super bro too) slayed these two slam pieces who lived together. We both ended up finishing around the same time, then before we left he unscrewed their toilet seat and took it with us hahah! We were like, hope ya like a soggy butt sluts![/quote]
Bronificent !
I bet those sloots had to hover for at least a week.
I am against calling girls slut unless they are sluts
a man of principles
[quote]jasmincar wrote:
I am against calling girls slut unless they are sluts
a pussy.[/quote]
Yea kid, we already knew that.
[quote]jasmincar wrote:
I am against calling girls slut unless they are sluts
a man of principles[/quote]
keep your stupid opinions to yourself… slut
[quote]gregron wrote:
[quote]jasmincar wrote:
I am against calling girls slut unless they are sluts
a man of principles[/quote]
keep your stupid opinions to yourself… slut[/quote]
calling him a slut would imply that he’s touched vagina, which simply is not true.
[quote]SickAbs wrote:
[quote]gregron wrote:
[quote]jasmincar wrote:
I am against calling girls slut unless they are sluts
a man of principles[/quote]
keep your stupid opinions to yourself… virgin slut wannabe[/quote]
calling him a slut would imply that he’s touched vagina, which simply is not true.[/quote]
fixed?
FUCKING LOL at this thread.
Advanced TS is my new favorite poster.
BUMP!!!
Own it or be Owned… or be bro-wned!
[quote]ADvanced TS wrote:
Greg BROstertag
[/quote]
Funny. Very funny.
^^ you’re a little late to the part here bro
[quote]SickAbs wrote:
Bros Like This Site: #3 Calling Girls Sluts The Comments are brilliant.
#3 Calling Girls Sluts
Bros dig power, and to be honest there is nothing more empowering than calling girls sluts. Honestly, does it get any better than cruising the streets with your bros and constantly saying, “Oh, look at these fucking sluts!” every time you pass by a group of girls. Answer: No, it doesnt. Bros love to change the pronunciation of sluts just to mix things up. Slutties, Sloots, and Slutbags are variations of the word, but they all mean the same thing: that the girl is a ho-bag.
While its fun to call girls sluts behind their back, its even more rewarding to call it to their face. The best part of calling girls sluts is that most of the time they arent sluts at all, but it still makes them feel like they are, which is awesome. Anytime you can make a girl feel self-conscience about herself, you have done your job as a bro.
Lets take a look at the appropriate times to call a girl a slut:
When shes showing off skin- Honestly, shes just asking to be called a slut at this point. This is a no-brainer. If you and your boys dont call her a slut, you lose serious bro-points. I mean this is a fucking lay-up line insult that will definitely get you some fist pounds so why would you pass it up?
When she insults you in any way - Its so fucking sweet being a bro. No matter what a girl says you always have a trump card. Say for example, some girl is making fun of you because you live in your parents basement. Thats when you remind her what she is.
When she rejects your advances - So, youÃ?¢??re at a bar with all your bros (obvs) and some girl thats hot as shit tries to get a beer right next to you. You obviously hit on her because shes basically asking for it. However, this girl doesnt appear interested. What do you do? In order to not lose any bro-cred its best to just rip into her calling her a slut. Other possibilities are that shes a “whore”, “lesbian”, or “dyke-bitch”.
2 Favorite Comments in comment section of link
“Me and some bros went to Acapulco to bro out on spring break when I saw some slut from Michigan. In a drunken bro rage, I pulled out the “slut/cunt” combo and whereby I received a 5-star to the face. Getting slapped earns you mad bro-cred”
“walking down the street saw some sluts holding hands. broke that bond and said, “excuse me sluts.” took five to the face for the bro community”
[/quote]
Sure, what’s being able to get laid compared to bro-cred?
[quote]DBCooper wrote:
I used to get off on calling a girl a slut right to her face in a loud, unambiguous manner, especially the dyke-cunt slut who holds the cup of wine at church during communion. I usually follow this up by batting my eyelashes at the priest to throw him off-guard long enough for me to get back to my seat. I don’t go to church anymore for unrelated reasons.
But lately I have found a much better angle. I like to smile at women I meet who won’t immediately sit on my face (they’re clearly lesbians) and show them a lot of teeth, then I roll my eyes into the back of my fucking skull and whisper ever so softly to them that I’ll put them in a fucking rose garden.
Not only does this get me the five-finger salute everytime, I’ve even had a lesbo-twat pull a gun on me. Getting a gun pulled on you by a worthless cum depository? Now THAT’S some serious bro-pointage. What a fucking dude![/quote]
I lolled. I really didn’t want to at this thread Damnit!
