[quote]Powerpuff wrote:
About the stereotypes, I’m sure most men don’t like being thought of as nonverbal, emotionally limited sex machines who are prone to violence and probably potential child molesters. [/quote]
Actually that sounds awesome. Except for the child molester part. I’m not into kids. The rest of it sounds badass though.[/quote]
LOL! And Dammit! Stop taking my insults as compliments.
Note to self. Next time put insults in SHOUTY CAPS so csulli will know that he should have his feelings hurt, or at least feel defensive. [/quote]
I have a question.
Like a serious and honest one.
Do you constantly fear “being judged” at a gym?
…[/quote]
Mostly I’m too busy judging other people to wonder if they are judging me.
Kidding.
I’m not sure what you mean by “being judged” at the gym? It’s not something I think about. I felt a little nervous when I first started lifting, but that was because it was all new.
I’ve never had anybody say anything rude to me at the gym. Most people are so busy doing their own thing, I don’t think they are paying much attention beyond saying “Good Morning” and such. Of people who do talk to me at the gym, they have been nice. I tend to assume good will. [/quote]
I read all the comments and and there were a lot of comments from women who claimed that they already “constantly feared judgement in the gym” and now they read this and they will never ever come out from under the bed again or some such.
I honestly dont know what they think I am thinking, the absolute highest level of judging I do would be “nice ass” if a spandex glad fitness bunny goes out of her way to have me notice it, like, wearing spandex and being in my general vicinity, but other than that, where does this fantasy come from?
I think the comments that noted that “newbie” might have been a better designation than “women” for some of the tips were right. It’s been a while since I’ve been in a commercial gym, but I absolutely feel I belong there. I don’t fear judgment. Not because my physique is so spectacular but because it’s fine and I think it’s evident that I work to keep it so. Like PP, I assume good will in the people around me, which in almost all cases is what I receive.
I don’t love the locker room, but I’m prudish and very private more than fearful of judgment, and I cope with it by coping with it.
[quote]pushharder wrote:
I just posted this comment on his site:
The PC backlash in the comments is comical and reinforces many stereotypes that the women who are making them so avidly abhor.
Bret, you did a great job here. There was good, useful information and it was spiced with truly entertaining observations that were not misogynistic in any way.
Keep it up![/quote]
You have the dumb. This has no educational value.[/quote]
You have the whine. I wasn’t trying to add any educational value.[/quote]
That was a response from the website by a woman that goes by “Karen.” He was making a joke. [/quote]
^^^
[quote]stefan128 wrote:
I read it and I can see why some people really didn’t like it. My question is, what if a woman wrote a similar article about men, how would most guys react? [/quote]
Not sure. However, plenty of men make observation about other male habits in the gym, and there aren’t a flood of defensive responses like “HEY I DO CURLS IN THE SQUAT RACK AND I BROKE A RIB BOUNCING A BARBELL OFF MY CHEST CUZ IM SWOLE AS FUCK BITHCES”
[quote]pushharder wrote:
I just posted this comment on his site:
The PC backlash in the comments is comical and reinforces many stereotypes that the women who are making them so avidly abhor.
Bret, you did a great job here. There was good, useful information and it was spiced with truly entertaining observations that were not misogynistic in any way.
Keep it up![/quote]
You have the dumb. This has no educational value.[/quote]
You have the whine. I wasn’t trying to add any educational value.[/quote]
That was a response from the website by a woman that goes by “Karen.” He was making a joke. [/quote]
^^[1]
I read all the comments and and there were a lot of comments from women who claimed that they already “constantly feared judgement in the gym” and now they read this and they will never ever come out from under the bed again or some such.
I honestly dont know what they think I am thinking, the absolute highest level of judging I do would be “nice ass” if a spandex glad fitness bunny goes out of her way to have me notice it, like, wearing spandex and being in my general vicinity, but other than that, where does this fantasy come from? [/quote]
OK - I went back and skimmed through most of the 300+ comments. I don’t relate to this personally, but looking for and stamping out misogyny is THE CAUSE for some people. They are very sensitive to it. I’d assume some people feel motivated to let the writer know that his words “harm” them, or harm the cause of women. I can guess that some intend to punish, shame, or at least get his attention. And, women are more sensitive to being judged by their physical appearance, and tend to already feel like going into the weight room is out of their comfort zone because it’s a male dominated space.
That’s all I’m going to say about that.
Feminism aside, when you think about how many people are seriously overweight, out of shape, and generally out of touch with their physical body because they don’t do anything active, it’s no wonder a lot of people don’t feel comfortable in the gym. Add to that the fact that depression and anxiety, or some combination of the two, are rampant in our society. Not a good situation.
Feminism aside, when you think about how many people are seriously overweight, out of shape, and generally out of touch with their physical body because they don’t do anything active, it’s no wonder a lot of people don’t feel comfortable in the gym. Add to that the fact that depression and anxiety, or some combination of the two, are rampant in our society. Not a good situation.
[/quote]
This is what I don’t understand though (just in general, not directed at you). If people are “ashamed” of their bodies, why would they not go to the gym? The excuse of “I don’t feel comfortable at the gym because I am out of shape” makes no sense to me as you go to the gym to improve yourself. I realize that many people say it is because others might possibly maybe judge them, but the majority of people think this way. If the majority of people are this worried about people judging them, do they even have time to judge others? It seems like logic would dictate going to the gym even if you feel “uncomfortable.”
As an aside, why all the anxiety and depression nowadays anyway?
OK - I went back and skimmed through most of the 300+ comments. I don’t relate to this personally, but looking for and stamping out misogyny is THE CAUSE for some people.
[/quote]
Feminism aside, when you think about how many people are seriously overweight, out of shape, and generally out of touch with their physical body because they don’t do anything active, it’s no wonder a lot of people don’t feel comfortable in the gym. Add to that the fact that depression and anxiety, or some combination of the two, are rampant in our society. Not a good situation.
[/quote]
This is what I don’t understand though (just in general, not directed at you). If people are “ashamed” of their bodies, why would they not go to the gym? The excuse of “I don’t feel comfortable at the gym because I am out of shape” makes no sense to me as you go to the gym to improve yourself. I realize that many people say it is because others might possibly maybe judge them, but the majority of people think this way. If the majority of people are this worried about people judging them, do they even have time to judge others? It seems like logic would dictate going to the gym even if you feel “uncomfortable.”
As an aside, why all the anxiety and depression nowadays anyway?[/quote]
My perspective may be on the harsh side, but from personal experience it’s just what you said it is: an excuse. Even if the situation were remedied, the vast majority of people who say such things will find new excuses in its place because at the core of their issue is they are just lazy and unwilling to change, even if they actually want to(with extremely rare exception, I don’t think anyone wants to be fat and lazy). As much as they may want to get in shape, somewhere inside they weigh the effort vs reward and keep on doing the easier thing.
Am I the only one that figures that a lot of these women that have huge problems with this, probably fit at least some of these stereotypes. I know from my experience with my wife, that women tend to get the most defensive about things whenever they have a ring of truth to them. I know that with her, if I make a tongue in cheek comment and it has no basis in truth its all cool. However, if the comment was something that caused her to realize something about herself that she hadn’t been aware of, it usually results in a defensive reaction. Also I do feel like most women do feel like they are being watched in the gym. I know with my wife and two other girlfriends, we had to train around movements that would cause them to spread their legs or god forbid you ask them to do cable ab pulldowns. (Which one day I caught myself validating their point with the pulldowns when I witnessed a very attractive “spandex clad fitness bunny” doing them and had my imaginaiton spin so fast I felt dizzy.)
As an aside, why all the anxiety and depression nowadays anyway?[/quote]
That’s a million dollar question, and could be the topic of a book or two.
We know there is a genetic component. If you want to have happy well-adjusted kids, pick a happy well-adjusted spouse.
Otherwise, you could guess that there’s higher reporting and treatment of these problems than in the past. Maybe people have always been depressed, they just didn’t talk about it. We now have pharmaceuticals that can alleviate some of the symptoms, not only of real depression and anxiety, but of just feeling down about normal “human condition” type stuff.
Or, you can speculate about cultural shifts that could contribute. We can probably list quite a few factors prevalent in society, that are probably making us both physically and emotionally sick.
[quote]Powerpuff wrote:
… but then I started to feel [… While I agree with some of the observations about lifting mechanics and weaknesses and such,…
About the stereotypes, …that kind of how I felt … Like he probably thinks I’m a drama queen, who doesn’t like facts much, is overly emotional…
[/quote]
As an aside, why all the anxiety and depression nowadays anyway?[/quote]
That’s a million dollar question, and could be the topic of a book or two.
We know there is a genetic component. If you want to have happy well-adjusted kids, pick a happy well-adjusted spouse. [/quote]
I would argue it’s more nurture than nature. My brother and I could not be anymore different in personality, and he has had a completely different lifestyle growing up than I did but, arguably, very similar genetics. Instead of genetics, I would assume more family and other relationships contribute.
Although, I will say that genetics do contribute to medical depression.
I hate that people try to fix the “‘human condition’ type stuff”. Maybe we are starting to depend too much on pharmaceuticals…
…which leads me into my next point. In the end, I think we are bringing each other down too much. Pretty much all of human history, humans have been better at bringing each other down rather than helping. Although we need human interaction to survive, we are WAY too connected with one another. Some separation from general humanity and many of the people you know seems to be much better than involving yourself in every little minutiae of every one you know.
[quote]Powerpuff wrote:
… but then I started to feel [… While I agree with some of the observations about lifting mechanics and weaknesses and such,…
About the stereotypes, …that kind of how I felt … Like he probably thinks I’m a drama queen, who doesn’t like facts much, is overly emotional…
[/quote]
Hmmmmm.
[/quote]
Jewbacca. And funny, because I’ve been told many times that I’m not a very emotional woman, meaning I tend to be pretty mellow/ even-keeled.
