Bible Contradictions

Off Topic Politics & World Issues
121

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:

[quote]JoabSonOfZeruiah wrote:

[quote]forbes wrote:

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:
How about that flaming sword guarding the tree of eternal life “from every way”? How come THAT hasnt been found now that we can see 100% of the earth?[/quote]

The flaming sword, since I presume it was a divine sword made from God, vanished after it was no longer necessary. I presume the Garden of Eden took a while to decay naturally. When it did, God most likely removed it or destroyed it.

Ya ya I know…how convenient.

Thing is I can say that about may things you believe.[/quote]
In Revelation it says that the tree of life is in heaven somehow moved from the garden of Eden so no more need of a flaming sword to protect it.[/quote]

Right. The impossible magic thing was poofed away by sky wizard, so you can make the same fucking retarded claim despite no shred of evidence.

You’re an idiot, seriously.[/quote]

You do not make any sense.

So, you read a book that said there is a flaming sword protecting a tree…and the same book says that it is in Heaven. But, you want proof of the flaming sword, but won’t accept the second part of the book that states that it is Heaven…you don’t see how you could possibly be wrong?[/quote]

Oh, yeah, it makes perfect sense.

The first part is a fucking lie. The second part is another fucking lie made up to explain away the first fucking lie.

I make sense because I dont believe in magical flaming swords, or any of the other nonsense you idiots believe in.

Sorry. I tried being nice and letting the retards have their imaginary Sky Wizard to make them feel better… till one of you reminded me that its only a matter of time before your idiocy has you supporting the slaughter of innocent people because “Uhh, the man up in the sky said it was ok.”

You, for believing what you do, are a fucking idiot, deserve no respect, and will get none from me.

122

And every time Tirib or Brother Chris or any one of you makes any claim about the accuracy of the bible, I’ll gladly explain that (a)it never fucking happened, (b)you’re a fucking idiot for believing it did, and (c) you represent a serious threat to the rest of civilization.

123

[quote]Pangloss wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
No. [/quote]

Does it matter who is doing the killing?

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
No one (hyperbole) is innocent in the eyes of God. Everyone (again hyperbole, as Jesus isn’t) is guilty. [/quote]

Are babies guilty?

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
So, God putting someone down is justified. [/quote]

How does a finite crime warrant an infinite punishment?

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
However, Anne Frank didn’t do anything warranting capital punishment, and therefore we have the conclusion that Hitler is evil and God is not. I’m not sure how anyone knows that Anne Frank is in Hell. [/quote]

But we all (Anne Frank) are guilty. Presumably this means that Anne’s punishment is hell. Anne was Jewish, so she had not accepted the good news, and therefore died in her sins.

Therefore, while not a certainty, it seems to me that we can rationally conclude that according to Christian theology, Anne is in hell.[/quote]

@Pangloss

No, it does not matter who is doing the killing.

Yes, everyone (except St. Mary and Jesus) are guilty. However, babes that day who haven’t had a chance to be baptized could hypothetically go to Heaven, through grace.

Because God is Most Just, this isn’t a conditional thing, like so far God has been most just. He is Most Just so all his decisions have to be completely just. He is the creator, doesn’t the creator have full domain over his property?

We can’t make that judgement that she went to Hell. I don’t know enough about Anne Frank to make a judgement on what she did in life. However, no one except God has the knowledge of her heart. She may have followed God’s will, she may have followed the Law. I cannot say, that is God’s place. As well, as a Jew she is my spiritual sister. I have several little kids that will be in my care once I am married, and if their parents are to die. Two of them are twins, a boy and a girl - both Jewish. Their parents have asked me if anything does happen, that I not baptise them (unless they wish to be baptised), and I have no problem with respecting their wishes.

As much as some people wish that was the case, I’ll have to say that it is not the case that with Catholic-Christian theology Anne Franke is in Hell. Jewish people are a very different situation within Catholic theology, and I’d have to do more research to explain it. But, I wouldn’t say that Ms. Frank is in Hell.

124

[quote]Pangloss wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]Pangloss wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

Nope, you eat the apple you die spiritually. Christianity 101.[/quote]

I thought that sinners burned for eternity in Christianity - so how exactly does one die spiritually?[/quote]

Sinners = everyone except Jesus and Mary. Everyone is dead spiritually, as in they will not live for eternity. Once baptized in the name of Jesus, one is born again of the water and the spirit. After the initial sanctification, one relies on their merit.[/quote]

So you don’t believe in hell? I’m not trying to misinterpret you, but this seems to be what you are saying.
[/quote]

No, it is real. It is also healthy to have an understanding fear of Hell and what it is.

125

[quote]pat wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]Pangloss wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

Nope, you eat the apple you die spiritually. Christianity 101.[/quote]

I thought that sinners burned for eternity in Christianity - so how exactly does one die spiritually?[/quote]

Sinners = everyone except Jesus and Mary. Everyone is dead spiritually, as in they will not live for eternity. Once baptized in the name of Jesus, one is born again of the water and the spirit. After the initial sanctification, one relies on their merit.[/quote]

Interestingly enough, the original language texts don’t really mention the kind of fruit it is…[/quote]

I know, but tradition always pictures it as an apple, and even though I don’t have a preference for it being an apple (after all, apples are good), just so not to nit pick, I say apple.

126

[quote]swoleupinya wrote:

[quote]pat wrote:

The problem most people have is that the look at it from one perspective, a human one. Death=bad=the end. From God’s perspective and indeed from a faithful folk, we should not see it that way. Death is not the end of life…It may hurt a bit, but it’s not the end. If terminating your body takes you to the next level which is better, then death is technically not a bad thing, but it only can be done by the creator of life. The living cannot decide when it’s a good idea to make death happen. We simply don’t have the knowledge to know when it’s is a good thing, because it can also be bad.
Obviously it’s a topic that can go on for a long time, but just look at it from a different perspective. We put dogs down to end their suffering, can God not do the same thing with us?

There was a story a while back where there was a little girl stuck in a well, the only way they could get her out was to break her leg, which hurt her really badly. But she lived. God likewise can take us out for own betterment.

Remember we are people of God, death does not end life, it ends the body’s constraints on life.We just don’t know what happens next, but we have to keep in mind there is more. Death does not end it.[/quote]

Hmmmm… where have I heard this type of reasoning before?

Nah… it’s cool. I’m sure that the Christians of today are not morally retarded enough to twist this into behaviors like genocide, terrorism, slave ownership etc… Yeah. There’s no way it could happen again. Right?[/quote]

Did you not read the whole of his message. He just said humans don’t have the ability to know when it is the right time to end someone’s life for the better.

127

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:

[quote]JoabSonOfZeruiah wrote:

[quote]forbes wrote:

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:
How about that flaming sword guarding the tree of eternal life “from every way”? How come THAT hasnt been found now that we can see 100% of the earth?[/quote]

The flaming sword, since I presume it was a divine sword made from God, vanished after it was no longer necessary. I presume the Garden of Eden took a while to decay naturally. When it did, God most likely removed it or destroyed it.

Ya ya I know…how convenient.

Thing is I can say that about may things you believe.[/quote]
In Revelation it says that the tree of life is in heaven somehow moved from the garden of Eden so no more need of a flaming sword to protect it.[/quote]

Right. The impossible magic thing was poofed away by sky wizard, so you can make the same fucking retarded claim despite no shred of evidence.

You’re an idiot, seriously.[/quote]

You do not make any sense.

So, you read a book that said there is a flaming sword protecting a tree…and the same book says that it is in Heaven. But, you want proof of the flaming sword, but won’t accept the second part of the book that states that it is Heaven…you don’t see how you could possibly be wrong?[/quote]

Oh, yeah, it makes perfect sense.

The first part is a fucking lie. The second part is another fucking lie made up to explain away the first fucking lie.

I make sense because I dont believe in magical flaming swords, or any of the other nonsense you idiots believe in.

Sorry. I tried being nice and letting the retards have their imaginary Sky Wizard to make them feel better… till one of you reminded me that its only a matter of time before your idiocy has you supporting the slaughter of innocent people because “Uhh, the man up in the sky said it was ok.”

You, for believing what you do, are a fucking idiot, deserve no respect, and will get none from me.[/quote]

Who is this Sky Wizard?
Who is this man up in the sky?

128

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:
And every time Tirib or Brother Chris or any one of you makes any claim about the accuracy of the bible, I’ll gladly explain that (a)it never fucking happened, (b)you’re a fucking idiot for believing it did, and (c) you represent a serious threat to the rest of civilization.

[/quote]

Yes, I’m sure the largest charity in the world is a threat to the rest of civilization.

129

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:
And every time Tirib or Brother Chris or any one of you makes any claim about the accuracy of the bible, I’ll gladly explain that (a)it never fucking happened, (b)you’re a fucking idiot for believing it did, and (c) you represent a serious threat to the rest of civilization.

[/quote]

Yes, I’m sure the largest charity in the world is a threat to the rest of civilization.[/quote]

“God told me to invade Iraq.”-
George W. Bush.

130

[quote]pat wrote:
The problem most people have is that the look at it from one perspective, a human one. Death=bad=the end. From God’s perspective and indeed from a faithful folk, we should not see it that way. Death is not the end of life…It may hurt a bit, but it’s not the end. If terminating your body takes you to the next level which is better, then death is technically not a bad thing, but it only can be done by the creator of life. The living cannot decide when it’s a good idea to make death happen. We simply don’t have the knowledge to know when it’s is a good thing, because it can also be bad.
Obviously it’s a topic that can go on for a long time, but just look at it from a different perspective. We put dogs down to end their suffering, can God not do the same thing with us?

There was a story a while back where there was a little girl stuck in a well, the only way they could get her out was to break her leg, which hurt her really badly. But she lived. God likewise can take us out for own betterment.

Remember we are people of God, death does not end life, it ends the body’s constraints on life.We just don’t know what happens next, but we have to keep in mind there is more. Death does not end it.[/quote]

Got kids? A wife? Your parents still alive?

How about I kill them, tell you that the Flying Spaghetti Monster said it was ok, and that I was doing them a favor. That the Flying Spaghetti Monster decided they needed to be put down like dogs and I was doing devine work.

How would you feel about that, pat?

131

…divine, not devine.

132

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:
And every time Tirib or Brother Chris or any one of you makes any claim about the accuracy of the bible, I’ll gladly explain that (a)it never fucking happened, (b)you’re a fucking idiot for believing it did, and (c) you represent a serious threat to the rest of civilization.

[/quote]

Yes, I’m sure the largest charity in the world is a threat to the rest of civilization.[/quote]

“God told me to invade Iraq.”-
George W. Bush.[/quote]

George W. Bush is not the Catholic Church. And Bush is half crazy.

133

[quote]CappedAndPlanIt wrote:

[quote]pat wrote:
The problem most people have is that the look at it from one perspective, a human one. Death=bad=the end. From God’s perspective and indeed from a faithful folk, we should not see it that way. Death is not the end of life…It may hurt a bit, but it’s not the end. If terminating your body takes you to the next level which is better, then death is technically not a bad thing, but it only can be done by the creator of life. The living cannot decide when it’s a good idea to make death happen. We simply don’t have the knowledge to know when it’s is a good thing, because it can also be bad.
Obviously it’s a topic that can go on for a long time, but just look at it from a different perspective. We put dogs down to end their suffering, can God not do the same thing with us?

There was a story a while back where there was a little girl stuck in a well, the only way they could get her out was to break her leg, which hurt her really badly. But she lived. God likewise can take us out for own betterment.

Remember we are people of God, death does not end life, it ends the body’s constraints on life.We just don’t know what happens next, but we have to keep in mind there is more. Death does not end it.[/quote]

Got kids? A wife? Your parents still alive?

How about I kill them, tell you that the Flying Spaghetti Monster said it was ok, and that I was doing them a favor. That the Flying Spaghetti Monster decided they needed to be put down like dogs and I was doing devine work.

How would you feel about that, pat?

[/quote]

Um, if Pat didn’t kill, I’m sure you’d be in the Psyche ward, because I’m not sure who this Flying Spaghetti Monster is.

Who is the Flying Spaghetti Monster again? Which reminds me, I need to get hamburger tomorrow.

134

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
@Pangloss

No, it does not matter who is doing the killing.

Yes, everyone (except St. Mary and Jesus) are guilty. However, babes that day who haven’t had a chance to be baptized could hypothetically go to Heaven, through grace.

Because God is Most Just, this isn’t a conditional thing, like so far God has been most just. He is Most Just so all his decisions have to be completely just. He is the creator, doesn’t the creator have full domain over his property? [/quote]

So if someone kills someone for making fun of a prophet, then that is wrong - no matter who does the killing. This is what your position is.

So, in Judges, when God kills some youths for insulting the prophet Elisha, by sending she bears after them, this would presumably be ‘wrong’, correct?

Or are insults about someone’s baldness somehow above reproach?

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:
We can’t make that judgement that she went to Hell. I don’t know enough about Anne Frank to make a judgement on what she did in life. However, no one except God has the knowledge of her heart. She may have followed God’s will, she may have followed the Law. I cannot say, that is God’s place. As well, as a Jew she is my spiritual sister. I have several little kids that will be in my care once I am married, and if their parents are to die. Two of them are twins, a boy and a girl - both Jewish. Their parents have asked me if anything does happen, that I not baptise them (unless they wish to be baptised), and I have no problem with respecting their wishes.

As much as some people wish that was the case, I’ll have to say that it is not the case that with Catholic-Christian theology Anne Franke is in Hell. Jewish people are a very different situation within Catholic theology, and I’d have to do more research to explain it. But, I wouldn’t say that Ms. Frank is in Hell. [/quote]

I think the bible is quite clear that anyone who doesn’t accept Jesus as the way is bound for a lake of fire.

135

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]Pangloss wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

[quote]Pangloss wrote:

[quote]Brother Chris wrote:

Nope, you eat the apple you die spiritually. Christianity 101.[/quote]

I thought that sinners burned for eternity in Christianity - so how exactly does one die spiritually?[/quote]

Sinners = everyone except Jesus and Mary. Everyone is dead spiritually, as in they will not live for eternity. Once baptized in the name of Jesus, one is born again of the water and the spirit. After the initial sanctification, one relies on their merit.[/quote]

So you don’t believe in hell? I’m not trying to misinterpret you, but this seems to be what you are saying.
[/quote]

No, it is real. It is also healthy to have an understanding fear of Hell and what it is.[/quote]

Do people go there for eternity?

136

Wow. Just Wow.

Some of the OP’s reasoning in this thread is comical.

I used to agree with the classic line a south park episode that scientology is “way more retarded” than the other major religions. I’m now starting to seriously question that.

I’m honestly starting to think that the story of Xenu (aka the ruler of the galactic confederacy) makes equally as much sense as christianity. We all accept how ridiculously retarded scientology is, yet if we only have to hold the claims of scientology to the same standards of evidence that some in thread hold christianity to, we can’t really disprove it at all.

Maybe I should start a thread where people can attempt to prove inconsistencies in scientology doctrine. I will destroy any non-believers arguments with nonsensical circular reasoning.

May Xenu have mercy on your thetans

137

BTW- here’s a passage where God sends she bears to maul some kids for making fun of a prophet because he’s bald:

NIV, Second Kings 2:23-24

2Ki 2:23 From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. “Go on up, you baldhead!” they said. “Go on up, you baldhead!”

2Ki 2:24 He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.

So…Does God now get special privileges with regard to killing children for insulting a prophet?

138

From the hate being received in this thread, I don’t know if I should start fearing for my life…

139

[quote]Pangloss wrote:
<<< I think the bible is quite clear that anyone who doesn’t accept Jesus as the way is bound for a lake of fire.[/quote]So do I, but they don’t. Actually they just have nifty ways of where people can accept Christ without knowing they have. This is called “another gospel” which proponents the Apostle Paul in the epistle to the Galatians calls “accursed” (anathema), but who’s worrying about that? Interesting you see that though. Yes, even unbelievers can see that much in the Word of God.

[quote]Brother Chris wrote: Who is the Flying Spaghetti Monster again? Which reminds me, I need to get hamburger tomorrow.[/quote]LOLOLOLOLOL!!! Now that I have the tears off my face from a goodly dose of hilarity. Outstanding!!!

140

[quote]Tiribulus wrote:
So do I, but they don’t. Actually they just have nifty of ways where people can accept Christ without knowing they have. This is called “another gospel” which proponents the Apostle Paul in the epistle to the Galatians calls “accursed” (anathema), but who’s worrying about that? Interesting you see that though. Yes, even unbelievers can see that much in the Word of God.
[/quote]

Not to needle you from another thread, but according to your epistemology, how can you know that it’s a false gospel (this other gospel)?

Seriously I feel like I’ve been picking on you lately and that’s TOTALLY not my intention. It’s also not my intention to give the impression that I think that presuppositionalists are completely useless (or anything of the sort). I think they are wrong, but I think that they can serve a healthy dose of humility to atheists (and others) by presenting things that aren’t often thought about.

Okay so that was my off topic and I’ll stop that avenue.

[quote]Tiribulus wrote:
LOLOLOLOLOL!!! Now that I have the tears off my face from a goodly dose of hilarity. Outstanding!!!
[/quote]

I think that Brother Chris was dissing italian food with that comment! That’s not right! There’s nothing wrong with spaghetti. Nothing WHAT SO EVER.