Beautiful.
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I think this is another example of deflect-fu but I’ll give my thoughts on this as an aside.
I spend a fair amount of my life trying to prepare people to produce results in uncertain circumstances. My experience of trying this over 10 years is that the ones who consistently succeed are not the ones who learn every possible “play” by rote, but those who give themselves the tools, decision making matrix and confidence to deal with whatever happens. Tl:dr: it’s not the ones who learn what to do in every situation, it’s the ones who know that whatever happens, they’ll be ok.
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@anna_5588 I hope your tone tonight is a cavalier and jestful response because talking about these issues in earnest are too much of an ask in this moment in time and that it doesn’t mean something else.
In particular, a part of me interprets all of this as you being resigned. That no active intent on your end would be adequate to resolve your issues and that you have no hopes beyond your issues being merely ameliorated by external passive solutions and outside circumstances.
I sincerely hope I’m seeing a pattern that isn’t there and that the fault lies in me as the interpreter: namely that I’m misinterpreting what is to be read between the lines here.
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I really do not like introspection and much prefer to divert my attention elsewhere
I also have a very bad habit of twisting prompts to my liking rather than addressing them directly.
All of this is so good. Just to reiterate it in another way: it’s impossible to change and control the entire world, but it’s entirely possibly to change and control how we respond to the world.
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Building resiliency rather than predictability, which is easier and more likely ultimately to produce the certainty that you strive for (that everything will be okay).
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I (and some others) call this placing conditions on happiness.
“I will be (happy, less stressed, quit drinking, not need to control everything) when…”
But the when never happens, because even if the object or event of anticipation happens it is never what the person had imagined or expected. Thus leading to more disenchantment and reliance on the negative coping mechanism. Because “See!?! Even that didn’t work. Its (situation/habit) Hopeless. 
”.
Then the search for the next axiomatic event or object begins again, while the condition of the person continues to degrade.
Is that kinda what you were trying to further describe?
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Yup. Exactly.
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Yeah. That is a big one for unhealthy minds.
It would sound crazy though if I were to propose that I’m not going to change my diet or engage in exercise until cardiac medicine comes up with a permanent artificial heart system to install for me, Because they are in the works. And I can catch a streetcar right downtown to go get one.
I don’t suppose I would receive much support for that line of thinking.
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Another thing I’m struggling with is that this exact thing served me a lot growing up. It’s a hard mindset shift
Sometimes I even question the value of happiness
I don’t think I’m alone in wanting an easy way out
Rephrase “growing up” with “when I was a child” and you will begin to see the issue with it.
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It might seem like it did, and in some ways it may have. I’ve been pretty open about some of my bad coping skills-violence, drug use, shutting down emotionally. Even my therapist says “You used them because you needed them at the time. They got you through that part. But at some point they became a detriment.”. And he’s right. At some point they became a detriment. And instead of developing better, more mature life skills and abilities-people become more reliant on the ones that worked back when.
You aren’t. The world is full of people who want and truly need one. Sometimes. For a brief period.
Its there for reason, not a vestigial remnant of some previous iteration of our species.
Try it some time. You might like it.
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I would have done wonderfully on the marshmallow test- delayed gratification. Every time I didn’t/don’t want to study, I just remind myself that studying now => having fun later. I don’t think the school I’m at helps- pretty much all my classmates think like this. Some students think this attitude is “pressure” or “competition”, I found it as an affirmation of my values.
Last semester, I really struggled with diff eq and the last thing I wanted to do was more math. When I complained, my good friend (the guy I like) would always remind me, “remember what Loewenstein said, even behavioural economists need math”
I think this is one of those times, like trying to use a hammer to screw in a nail.
I don’t want happiness, I want purpose/success
Almost… 
“When the only tool you have is a hammer, everything starts looking like a nail.”.
How do you know?
Those three things aren’t mutually exclusive.
Have you ever been happy then something bad happens, and it becomes easier to conclude that there is no need for happiness because in short order it will be taken away?
I learned that very early. Don’t even bother trying. What ever you like or for what ever reason you felt joy-it will be taken, you will be punished, he/she will die.
It was false. I still have a very hard time with this, but I still try.
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Week 25: Day 6
Manmakers: 10-1 w/ 200m run btw sets
Daily work (makeup for yesterday): 2x(20rows/side-20lbs+20towel pull apart rows+20 Y to Ws)
- pretty intense but felt really good, surprised at how well the running went despite the pistols yesterday
Fun stuff and Daily work
Tabata KB snatch-25lbs
2x(20rows/side-20lbs+20towel pull apart rows+20 Y to Ws)
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Wait, you didn’t do daily work yesterday, so you double dosed it today? The benefit of doing something daily is that it doesn’t matter if you miss it one day as you’ll be back at it the next day
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I missed it yesterday because something unexpected came up, also didn’t do it Thursday because I really didn’t feel like it
I feel like you missed my point that there’s no need to make up for anything.
Let’s say I have four workouts per week, centered around movement patterns. If I miss one of them, I might slide it over to another day to practice that movement pattern 1x/wk. By comparison, if I do a 6 day PPL rotation I won’t have the same incentive to recoup a session I couldn’t/didn’t do as compared to the total number of sessions I’ll do in a year makes one session inconsequential.
That’s the principle point that I’m making.
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Yup. Making up daily work makes zero sense.
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Heck, I’d take that even further. I missed the whole of last week, and just did the next session in the program like nothing ever happened. Missing a few days, or a week, will not adversely impact your strength or fitness. Overdoing it to make up what you missed might.
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