For fucks sake. “Spider monkey?” “Jeff ‘I’ve been around the block’ a la old man rivers”
Come on.
I’m with tedro on this. If I gave myself a month or so to do some conditioning, I’m pretty sure I’d be able to show something more impressive than these assclowns.
Shit, I’d even go as far as to say bigragoo could pull something impressive on the show. Sorta. Maybe…
I wanna see Dave Tate as a competitor. I bet no Gladiator would talk shit to him.
That was a painful 2 hours. Some thoughts:
They way over-did the cheesiness. The cheese factor of the original was brimming over, and they quadrupled it for this one.
Those contestants sucked, in all facets of the term. Unathletic, apparently poorly conditioned, and obnoxious. I was rooting for the Gladiators the whole time.
What I would give to see a D1 football Safety or Linebacker be a contestant in that. Of course, they would never let someone like that on the show because they’d dominate the moronic gladiators, negating their whole cheesy ‘david vs. goliath’ concept.
Speaking of good contestants, anyone remember that “2 scoops” contestant from the original? He was awesome.
The announcer was monotone and horrible. The hosts, Hogan and Ali, were so poor at delivering their scripted ‘interviews’ that it made me squirm in my seat.
The ‘Pyramid’ is a moderately cool event, but only when the contestants are getting repeatedly thrown down onto their heads.
Any male contestant who holds their nose while jumping into the water at any point in the competition, but especially on the Eliminator, should be automatically DQ’d, beaten with an extension cord, and forced to wear a brightly colored rainbow leotard on his way out of the arena.
The whole show just seems over-produced. Too many cameras, too much bullshit. In the original, the camera angle had you watching the whole event, the whole time, so you could see everything. Now they’re zooming into a different square-foot area every 3 seconds, it sucks.
The female gladiator, Crush, is absolutely stunning. If I watch that show again, she might be the sole reason why.
[quote]rrjc5488 wrote:
Shit, I’d even go as far as to say bigragoo could pull something impressive on the show. Sorta. Maybe…[/quote]
Let’s not get carried away here…
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
7) Any male contestant who holds their nose while jumping into the water at any point in the competition, but especially on the Eliminator, should be automatically DQ’d, beaten with an extension cord, and forced to wear a brightly colored rainbow leotard on his way out of the arena.
[/quote]
Hahahahaha.
I second this rule being in effect.
That, and what the shit is it with the water? Everyone seemed so scared of it. No one actually dived in, which would have had people popping up out of the water on the other side of the “20 foot” swim under fire. The marine mom shanked herself on the steel pipe. And that “AA” firefighter swimming underwater? For Christs sake… I’ve seen dogs swim underwater better than he did.
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
9) The female gladiator, Crush, is absolutely stunning. If I watch that show again, she might be the sole reason why.[/quote]
Agreed. She is bangin’.
Bauer,
You summed it up pretty well. One more thing, though. What happened to the contact events? The asian kid wouldn’t have stood a chance on the old show. Instead, he is able to stay in it because the gladiator apparently doesn’t know the rules of joust and the white dude was just old and out of shape.
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
rrjc5488 wrote:
Shit, I’d even go as far as to say bigragoo could pull something impressive on the show. Sorta. Maybe…
Let’s not get carried away here…[/quote]
I guess if we gave him a few years to get in shape for it. But even then, we’d have to get his fatass into the gym first…
[quote]BodyBldgBabe wrote:
…there is no question I could do better than these schmoes.
Okay, I say we all pool our money together to send Tedro to Cali for tryouts! Ill lay down the first $20. Whose with me? 
We need to send at least one T-member to show um how its done ;D
Thanks B-3, but I don’t think I am flamboyant enough for NBC!
Ill coach you on personality baby, you just get that fine ass out there and show um how its done T-STYLE!!!
[/quote]
I think earlier in this thread somebody said that during the tryout process you have to carry a video camera around with you and record a typical day in your life.
Once I get passed the athletic portion of the tryout I’ll hit you up to help me with the video ;).
I love Gina Carano so much. She’s my inspiration, I love her fighting/personality.
With that said, she’s the only reason I’ll still watch the show. Perhaps my memories of the 90’s are fuzzy, but I remember enjoying the show more in the past.
For those who care, here’s Crush kickin ass.
I like it. Too much talking but still fun to watch IMO. Chicks are bangin’.
Check out the other contestants, I bet this guy here is going to win:
http://www.nbc.com/American_Gladiators/contestants/evan_dollard.shtml
[quote]Squiggles wrote:
For those who care, here’s Crush kickin ass.
[/quote]
My infatuation is growing…
[quote]tedro wrote:
Check out the other contestants, I bet this guy here is going to win:
http://www.nbc.com/American_Gladiators/contestants/evan_dollard.shtml
[/quote]
LOL. Well, if “spider monkey” can win, I guess we can’t rule out anybody.
Oh, and did I see a contestant by the name “Adonis” on there? Shit, his parents really set him up for failure with that one.
“Shit Sandwich”
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
That was a painful 2 hours. Some thoughts:
They way over-did the cheesiness. The cheese factor of the original was brimming over, and they quadrupled it for this one.
Those contestants sucked, in all facets of the term. Unathletic, apparently poorly conditioned, and obnoxious. I was rooting for the Gladiators the whole time.
What I would give to see a D1 football Safety or Linebacker be a contestant in that. Of course, they would never let someone like that on the show because they’d dominate the moronic gladiators, negating their whole cheesy ‘david vs. goliath’ concept.
Speaking of good contestants, anyone remember that “2 scoops” contestant from the original? He was awesome.
The announcer was monotone and horrible. The hosts, Hogan and Ali, were so poor at delivering their scripted ‘interviews’ that it made me squirm in my seat.
The ‘Pyramid’ is a moderately cool event, but only when the contestants are getting repeatedly thrown down onto their heads.
Any male contestant who holds their nose while jumping into the water at any point in the competition, but especially on the Eliminator, should be automatically DQ’d, beaten with an extension cord, and forced to wear a brightly colored rainbow leotard on his way out of the arena.
The whole show just seems over-produced. Too many cameras, too much bullshit. In the original, the camera angle had you watching the whole event, the whole time, so you could see everything. Now they’re zooming into a different square-foot area every 3 seconds, it sucks.
The female gladiator, Crush, is absolutely stunning. If I watch that show again, she might be the sole reason why.[/quote]
Hilarious, accurate review of the show. Point #7 was one of the funniest things I have read in a while.
If my memory serves me correctly, the type of contestants they used to have on the show were REAL ATHLETES aka NCAA Greco Roman Wrestling Champions or were recently a CHAMPION at a college level D1 sport. They’ve got nothing but chumps on this show.
At times I was getting second hand embarrassment watching this show.
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
9) The female gladiator, Crush, is absolutely stunning. If I watch that show again, she might be the sole reason why.[/quote]
Can’t wait until Crush and Siene Silva duke it out, preferably on Earthquake:
http://www.nbc.com/American_Gladiators/contestants/siene_silva.shtml
i thought it was hilarious and entertaining although some of the contestants sucked.
[quote]Bauer97 wrote:
Squiggles wrote:
For those who care, here’s Crush kickin ass.
My infatuation is growing…[/quote]
Yeah I’ve had my eye on her since I saw her on that fight girls show. She’s badass