EEEE!, ourobouro_s, I have a feeling that you may get some pretty empathetic replies to this dilemma! Starting with moi, for example: some people may skim my little pseudo-log (what the heck does she actually DO to train?), and think I’m one of those metabolism freaks (i.e. effortlessly slim…when I paid for that ‘slimness’ with years of bulimia/anorexia HELL
).
Re: hunger pangs, there are times-often horrormonal-that I go around licking the freakin’ paint offa the walls (some colours DO in fact taste better than others). I often wish I was gutsy enough to tap myself on the head with a [ballpeen] hammer; just hard enough so that by the time I regained consciousness, I wouldn’t be hungry anymore!
Two months into my weight regimen, I ballooned 5 pounds (since I’m short, it’d be like 10-i5 lbs. for the average women!), and was ready to ditch my brand-new little muscles. Fortunately, I found the fortitude to grit my teeth and perservere; unusual, since I’m really talented at the BIG QUIT.
Granted, I sort of settled back at 100ish in short order, but I still bounce up occasionally…which I try to ignore!
Now, you’re WAY taller and stronger than me, and a few months ahead in your training.
And when I saw you maybe 3 weeks ago, you looked very willowy; didn’t see a thick, musclebound gal (although when you started lifting, you looked PLENTY strong-and still willowy!).
Damn, girl, when are we chicklets gonna be able to revel in a bit of size (especially when it’s freakin’ muscles!)?! I DO know the sort of ‘anxiety’/discomfort you’re fighting…just hang in there till the fall, at least; I really do believe your body is still ‘adjusting’.
You’re STILL gaining strength (not just a few pounds), so try to concentrate on the Strong Woman-who doesn’t need to be a total stick to feel validated. You totally kick butt, so don’t self-disparage! We can have a therapy session soon, and in the meantime chill, kiddo :).
(And would you mind printing this off, so you can read it back to me when I need it?!)
Oh, and big THX for those cross-dressing cheerleaders re: my DL/PR! Are you sending them to the farm? If so, I could use the help packing!!