[quote]maraudermeat wrote:
DaCharmingAlbino wrote:
Still feel skinny and weak. Bigorexia is here.
that never goes away. i’ve never felt “big” until i see pics of myself and then i think, that’s not me… right.
can anyone else relate?
[/quote]
There has been some sort of change whether I’ve internalized it or not though.
When you are skinny, guys your size and bigger have no problem invading your personal space. When my body shape and facial features started to change - some of the extra muscle has gone to my jawline, making my face wider; my shoulders have gotten wider, too, and I’m walking differently due to repeated anal probes, er, I mean, because my thighs and ass are bigger; I’m beginning to take on an athletic shape - guys who weigh more than me started giving me more space. I don’t think I’m making it up. After a lifetime of receiving dismissive reactions from alpha-type males, I can tell when I’m being treated like one myself. I’ve had fellas literally back away as I’ve walked toward them. Maybe they were just being polite, but a few have moved more quickly than necessary and I wasn’t crowding them to begin with.
I’ve had to stop thinking at all about the poundages, because part of me thinks that it is clearly impossible for me to move that weight. Another part of me believes that I’m not yet as strong as I ought to be. So I just look at the plan, check the numbers and go lift that and try to shut my head off as to whether I can do it or not.
Also, what I see in the mirror is like a stranger. The vids I take of my lifts seem like they are of someone else, even though I was THERE and I set up the friggin camera.
[quote]DaCharmingAlbino wrote:
maraudermeat wrote:
DaCharmingAlbino wrote:
Still feel skinny and weak. Bigorexia is here.
that never goes away. i’ve never felt “big” until i see pics of myself and then i think, that’s not me… right.
can anyone else relate?
i totally get that… all of it. especially the facial changes. i was watching a vid of my handless front squats the other day and when i’m holding my breath through the rep, i have huge muscles running the sides of my head near my temples. they bulge out like tumors. plus my jaws are much thicker (not just from fat) from when i started powerlifting. i really think it has to do with the holding the breath thing because when i was a bodybuilder i didn’t notice it at all. my facial structure is totally different now. i’ve had people not even recognize me now.
i still feel smaller than others at times… i’ve gone to meets and thought all these people are huge and then find out that me and maybe two others outweigh everyone else by 20 or more pounds.
There has been some sort of change whether I’ve internalized it or not though.
When you are skinny, guys your size and bigger have no problem invading your personal space. When my body shape and facial features started to change - some of the extra muscle has gone to my jawline, making my face wider; my shoulders have gotten wider, too, and I’m walking differently due to repeated anal probes, er, I mean, because my thighs and ass are bigger; I’m beginning to take on an athletic shape - guys who weigh more than me started giving me more space. I don’t think I’m making it up. After a lifetime of receiving dismissive reactions from alpha-type males, I can tell when I’m being treated like one myself. I’ve had fellas literally back away as I’ve walked toward them. Maybe they were just being polite, but a few have moved more quickly than necessary and I wasn’t crowding them to begin with.
I’ve had to stop thinking at all about the poundages, because part of me thinks that it is clearly impossible for me to move that weight. Another part of me believes that I’m not yet as strong as I ought to be. So I just look at the plan, check the numbers and go lift that and try to shut my head off as to whether I can do it or not.
Also, what I see in the mirror is like a stranger. The vids I take of my lifts seem like they are of someone else, even though I was THERE and I set up the friggin camera. [/quote]
I have sort of the opposite problem, since I’ve never been skinny. I’ve always been large, both height and width. Unfortunately, for a good portion of my life, that’s also been a lot of fat. So whenever I look at myself in the mirror, I see a fat guy.
In fact, I catch myself bitching about all the fat I carry around, and my coworkers – who’ve known me since I weighed 300+ – and my girlfriend look at me like I’m crazy. They tell me I’m not fat, I’m one huge muscle! I just don’t see it.
Sometimes I feel somewhat muscular, but it’s because most of the people at my gym think curling 40 lbs and doing a few 20 lb upright rows and a 90 lbs Smith machine bench is an exhaustive workout. As soon as I’m around (physically or mentally) people who’re actually STRONG, I realize how small, weak, and flabby I am.
I have to tell my brain to STFU and go by things like strength increases, measurement increases, and tanked LBM to get a real picture of where I am (even though I weigh myself daily, I think I’ve finally talked myself out of thinking weight == bad. Now, I just wish my waist would go down a few inches. ).
(Actually, I take it back. The period before I went into the Army I was starving, and only weighed 175 lbs. So I have been skinny. Believe it or not, I still thought I was fat then.)
[quote]ecogenx wrote:
I think all of us on this site are much bigger (muscular) then the general population. We’re just never satisfied and hard on ourselves. [/quote]
That is understandable, though, as most of us, when comparing our musculature to someone else, compare them to those in our lifting peer group.
And yes, I am bigger than most of those around me everyday…in muscular breadth and waistline girth.
Except our cable guy (network cables). Lean and strong…He started back in the gym the other day and worked through a set of 360x10 on bench. Some people are just “farm strong”, as he calls it.
The shocker for me is when I go out with old friends, lately I have every few months been getting together with the group of guys I grew up with. I was always into lifitng, bbing, etc, since I was a whippersnapper, but a ‘big’ 215lb 19 year old is different than my big old ugly ass now. A few months back a friend I last saw 15 years ago just had to stand next to me all night and ‘dude, you are huge’ every 20 minutes or so. But a few days later, amongst my daily routine, I felt ‘normal’.
Okay - I gotta try those weigthed hip thrusts and glute bridges in today’s site article. I mean - my ass isn’t already big enough; I need a booty capable of breaking the thick part of whiskey bottles.
I don’t notice size and muscules as much as I notice the overall aging process. I’ll run into someone I knew from way back in the day and think, “god, do I look that old?”. Hope not. Course I still like to invade skinny people’s personal space and kick a little sand in their face when I get a chance.
[quote]hel320 wrote:
I don’t notice size and muscules as much as I notice the overall aging process. I’ll run into someone I knew from way back in the day and think, “god, do I look that old?”. Hope not. Course I still like to invade skinny people’s personal space and kick a little sand in their face when I get a chance.[/quote]
Anyone who swims with orcas in the wild and kills poisonous snakes with their bare hands deserves to be able to do that.
I have noticed that this pursuit of ours tends to delay the ageing process. Except for the white hairs, I look about 10-15 years younger than many of my contemporaries. And I’m stronger than most men half my age. I like that.
Hel you Bastid
do you know how much sand has been kicked on me???
It is a bit of a shocker- when I shake hands, I dont squeeze very hard but I happen to have larger hands then most people expect- unless they are a farmer- or construction type, or train, they always do a double take.
I starved myself through college to stay about 60kg or 130 lbs- but dwarfed the kids I wrestled.
so I always think I am smaller then I am- and Im not a big guy- but eco is right we are all larger, bigger stronger then average people but feel small compared to others on the site, gym etc.
And DCA I saw that article too, and said I wonder who is going to do it first, me or dca…
[quote]kmcnyc wrote:
Hel you Bastid
do you know how much sand has been kicked on me???
It is a bit of a shocker- when I shake hands, I dont squeeze very hard but I happen to have larger hands then most people expect- unless they are a farmer- or construction type, or train, they always do a double take.
I starved myself through college to stay about 60kg or 130 lbs- but dwarfed the kids I wrestled.
so I always think I am smaller then I am- and Im not a big guy- but eco is right we are all larger, bigger stronger then average people but feel small compared to others on the site, gym etc.
And DCA I saw that article too, and said I wonder who is going to do it first, me or dca…[/quote]
I’m going to try the bridges in place of good mornings on Thursday or Friday after deadlifting.
edit:
Here’s a thought: Don’t the weighted bridges and hip thrusts provide the same movement pattern as the reverse hyper, but as a closed chain movement? If these are good, I may have saved myself construction costs and time… I just drew up a design for a reverse hyper setup last night as a matter of fact - measured my cage and the various lengths of wood and pipe I’d need, but if the thrusters and bridges work all I need is a floor and a bench.
Not for nothing, I know our builds are not similar, but a couple of things re: your quest for 200 oh.
Don’t cut out bench entirely. Even if it’s just every other week, or once a month, or whatever, for me, and others, bench does help some with overhead. My oh seems to be more solid if I am throwing some bench in now and again at least.
Another thing that helps my oh-- deload. I know you don’t like to lighten up or take a week off etc., but with me, my shoulders need that rest every 3-5 weeks. Even if you go something like 3-4 oh weeks, then a bench week w/out overhead…something like that…it might help. Just saying—at our ages, sometimes that break is good mojo.
Also: overhead lockouts (which you already do), Z-presses, and any tricep stuff you like seem to help oh strength. (Don’t discount jerks as helping with strict pressing too, and vice versa).
Sorry to ramble, take it for what it’s worth. Good luck in your quest.
You coming back up to Sac for the Raw meet in Nov??? A few guys are talking about doing that meet, so I might try to get motivated again.
Not for nothing, I know our builds are not similar, but a couple of things re: your quest for 200 oh.
Don’t cut out bench entirely. Even if it’s just every other week, or once a month, or whatever, for me, and others, bench does help some with overhead. My oh seems to be more solid if I am throwing some bench in now and again at least.
Another thing that helps my oh-- deload. I know you don’t like to lighten up or take a week off etc., but with me, my shoulders need that rest every 3-5 weeks. Even if you go something like 3-4 oh weeks, then a bench week w/out overhead…something like that…it might help. Just saying—at our ages, sometimes that break is good mojo.
Also: overhead lockouts (which you already do), Z-presses, and any tricep stuff you like seem to help oh strength. (Don’t discount jerks as helping with strict pressing too, and vice versa).
Sorry to ramble, take it for what it’s worth. Good luck in your quest.
You coming back up to Sac for the Raw meet in Nov??? A few guys are talking about doing that meet, so I might try to get motivated again.
see ya
Mark Sikora[/quote]
Sorry for the identity crisis. Any and all appellations above acceptable.
I was going to try working in power ring pushups, faux planches and pushups working my hands closer to my hips in place of benching. I’ve always wanted to do a full planche, pressing my body off the floor and I think I’m still light enough to do it.
Good suggestion re: deloading. I’ve had to bend to the reality of the deload and recently took one. 3 4-day on-off cycles and I lighten up on the 4th or part of it.
There’s a meet in November? First I heard of it! I think I can choose my attempts better this time. Screw records or PRs - I want a total. Wish I’d stayed to see all of Stan Efferding’s attempts at the last meet, but I had the fam with me - wide-eyed and frightened at first, then bored…
Downing a half gallon of milk a day or thereabouts in addition to reg meals. It’s a race between my son and me who’s going to get enough casein in their bod lately.
4-mile bike ride + soccer practice ball retrieval and goalie practice target
1-arm BB Press
55x5
65x5
75x5
85x1,2 (PR +5 lbs)
75x5
Deadlift
225x3
315x2
415x1
475x1
Weighted Glute Bridges
225x8
275x8
315x5
Pullups
BWx6,6
Notes:
BB Press - got a dead spot on the right side. slows the lift down considerably
Deadlift - just glad I got one tonight.
Glute bridges - strange but I think my rear is gonna ache tomorrow. I can barely get in under the bar. I don’t know how that guy in the video was able to roll the bar right over himself…
[quote]JoeGood wrote:
Damn DCA, you are on your way to a triple bodyweight DL.[/quote]
That’s quite a ways away, unfortunately. That’d be 570 at my current weight, but I appreciate the sentiment. Maybe the weighted air humping will make a difference, though, and bring me closer to that poundage.
).