www.cyberpump.com/preview/sean010.html
"Step into my cage, nest the bar into position, rise and test the flex. The day that bar gets too whippy is the day it retires. One step back, check my foot placement and immediately soften my focus. I always know the first rep. It feels much like an amusement park ride that has just begun to move. Down in the hole and up, 5 reps, no rest, lots of breathing.
I’m actually feeling it at the end of that 5th rep. I mentioned before that the psyching starts now, and I play a mind game that allows me to psych for one rep and ride the coat tails for another. SIX! C’mon… get Six! SIX… FOCUS! Down, up, down, up. Six and seven are history and gone from my mind. Pumpers that can out squat me in pounds would rack the bar now, its heavy enough. EIGHT DAMMIT!! GET IT NOW! Bang, Bang. Chalk up 9 reps.
My back is getting pumped and the burn is starting. “God Almighty, help me get these reps! Keep that burn AWAY!” More reps… and I notice that the rise from the hole is getting fearsome. By 12 reps I can see the doubt in my mind but I cannot even pay a split second of attention to it or I am done. THIRRRRTTEEEEEEENNNN!!! Ahhh yeah… that hurts.
Fourteen and fifteen come after coaxing myself not to die. Sixteen and seventeen just plain suck. I can’t say enough about the horribleness of those reps. There is no end in sight for them so you have nothing to anticipate. They hurt because your body is just mashed like a pancake. Your back and legs are screaming at you to let them out of this hell, and they take too long to complete the mission. Your abs are flexed enough that if that bar came off your shoulders you would puke – the only thing keeping the contents intact is the weight you are fighting. And at this point I know that if I rack the weight I have failed.
I also know that every rep I continue through from here is my reward. I like rewards, and I strive on. “YAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!” The breath forces itself out now and 18 is done. Nineteen is always doubtful and I’m never sure I will make it given how long 18 takes to complete. The rise out of the hole is pure agony and made all the more miserable by the fact that I’M STILL NOT DONE! Keep your FORM!!! ONE MORE!! ONE MORE!!! YEAH!!! And down I go. The rise out of 20 is fueled by one sentence: “RACK THE BAR!!!” I always get 20 if I get 19. And I rack the bar. I have a hard time adjusting to the feeling of empty shoulders at this point, and my entire body gives out.
With luck I land on the bench a mile away from me (1/2 step) and do a few pullovers to assist my breathing. I usually cannot see for a minute or two, and I can literally feel the heartbeat in my neck as I lay on the bench or floor. My thighs fibrillate from the shock and my back is screaming in agony. The pain is severe and immediate. As it subsides I lay there on the ground, thoughtless and empty. My dues are paid and I get to be a lifter for another week. Just to make sure I’m approved I nod at my bar.
It nods back.
And I’m redeemed.
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