10 Golden Rules For the Gym

Off Topic
41

Get this shit-

My gym has two squat racks next to each other. Today I’m fortunate enough to only have one stupid motherfucker curling in the squat rack next to mine. He’s doing those curls where the elbows remain stationary and only the lower back and shoulders move. With three 10s on each side. WTF?

So later in the W/O I’m doing standing calf raises and the Gucci Fag has the balls to put his fuckin foot on my machine to stretch his hammy, while I’m mid-set. I should have snapped his fucking leg in half, but I didn’t feel like going to jail tonight. Ugh. Basically, I just tore him a new asshole… If I ever see you again…yada, yada, yada.

It’s not about gym rules or workout rules, it’s about common fucking courtesy and general respect for those around you.

And if your balls are air drying for more than ten seconds in the locker room, you’re a disrespecting faggot. Put a towel on.

42

First of all, how many of these threads are going to be posted. Unless this is going out to the average Joe,it will not do anything. Last time I checked the people on this site already know this shit. Second point, I am a personal trainer and own a training studio. There are a lot of shitty trainers but there are a lot of shitty people in any profession. Maybe you should seek out a trainer so you can become “lean Tony” or “healthy Tony”. Don’t talk shit about something knowing that there are probably a good amount of trainers on this site that know a hell of a lot more than you. If that is you in the picture why don’t you add another rule Don’t be fat and eat at Burger King.

43

[quote]GymGeek wrote:
Get this shit-

My gym has two squat racks next to each other. Today I’m fortunate enough to only have one stupid motherfucker curling in the squat rack next to mine. He’s doing those curls where the elbows remain stationary and only the lower back and shoulders move. With three 10s on each side. WTF?

So later in the W/O I’m doing standing calf raises and the Gucci Fag has the balls to put his fuckin foot on my machine to stretch his hammy, while I’m mid-set. I should have snapped his fucking leg in half, but I didn’t feel like going to jail tonight. Ugh. Basically, I just tore him a new asshole… If I ever see you again…yada, yada, yada.

It’s not about gym rules or workout rules, it’s about common fucking courtesy and general respect for those around you.

And if your balls are air drying for more than ten seconds in the locker room, you’re a disrespecting faggot. Put a towel on.[/quote]

The guy who put his foor up on “your” machine…was he an actual homosexual, or are you just a complete and total idiot?

Take your “tough guy” act and go somewhere else. Or grow the fuck up.

Moron.

44

Public Hot Tub Rules…

If any part of one guy’s body touches another guy’s body in the hot tub, both guys must immediately pull away, as if burned, and look away. If it happens again, one guy must get out of the hot tub and walk away.

Unless you know the guy, then you just make gay jokes.

|/ 3Toes

45

[quote]harris447 wrote:
GymGeek wrote:
Get this shit-

My gym has two squat racks next to each other. Today I’m fortunate enough to only have one stupid motherfucker curling in the squat rack next to mine. He’s doing those curls where the elbows remain stationary and only the lower back and shoulders move. With three 10s on each side. WTF?

So later in the W/O I’m doing standing calf raises and the Gucci Fag has the balls to put his fuckin foot on my machine to stretch his hammy, while I’m mid-set. I should have snapped his fucking leg in half, but I didn’t feel like going to jail tonight. Ugh. Basically, I just tore him a new asshole… If I ever see you again…yada, yada, yada.

It’s not about gym rules or workout rules, it’s about common fucking courtesy and general respect for those around you.

And if your balls are air drying for more than ten seconds in the locker room, you’re a disrespecting faggot. Put a towel on.

The guy who put his foor up on “your” machine…was he an actual homosexual, or are you just a complete and total idiot?

Take your “tough guy” act and go somewhere else. Or grow the fuck up.

Moron.
[/quote]

While you are on the bench it’s your bench. If I put my foot on your bench while you are pressing, I would expect nothing less from you than what I said to this guy.

Sorry if my “tough guy” speak offended you. I was a little PO’d when I was writing and it came out that way. But no, I’m not a moron, I grew up a long time ago, I am not going somewhere else (I happen to believe there is a lot of good info on this site), I am not a total idiot, and I have no idea what his sexual orientation was. But he was a stupid motherfucking ignorant gucci faggot when he put his foot on the calf raise machine while I was mid set.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it - Tough Guy.

46

[quote]GymGeek wrote:
harris447 wrote:
GymGeek wrote:
Get this shit-

My gym has two squat racks next to each other. Today I’m fortunate enough to only have one stupid motherfucker curling in the squat rack next to mine. He’s doing those curls where the elbows remain stationary and only the lower back and shoulders move. With three 10s on each side. WTF?

So later in the W/O I’m doing standing calf raises and the Gucci Fag has the balls to put his fuckin foot on my machine to stretch his hammy, while I’m mid-set. I should have snapped his fucking leg in half, but I didn’t feel like going to jail tonight. Ugh. Basically, I just tore him a new asshole… If I ever see you again…yada, yada, yada.

It’s not about gym rules or workout rules, it’s about common fucking courtesy and general respect for those around you.

And if your balls are air drying for more than ten seconds in the locker room, you’re a disrespecting faggot. Put a towel on.

The guy who put his foor up on “your” machine…was he an actual homosexual, or are you just a complete and total idiot?

Take your “tough guy” act and go somewhere else. Or grow the fuck up.

Moron.

While you are on the bench it’s your bench. If I put my foot on your bench while you are pressing, I would expect nothing less from you than what I said to this guy.

Sorry if my “tough guy” speak offended you. I was a little PO’d when I was writing and it came out that way. But no, I’m not a moron, I grew up a long time ago, I am not going somewhere else (I happen to believe there is a lot of good info on this site), I am not a total idiot, and I have no idea what his sexual orientation was. But he was a stupid motherfucking ignorant gucci faggot when he put his foot on the calf raise machine while I was mid set.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it - Tough Guy.
[/quote]

So, if you have no idea what his sexual orientation is, then why would you call him a faggot?

Or, are you just a douchebag who uses the word ‘faggot’ indiscriminately and makes yourself look like an uneducated, drooling asshole?

47

[quote]smt_007 wrote:
For the amount of idiots at the gyms, im surprised there arent many fights at gyms, has anyone seen a fight at a gym?[/quote]

I was actually in a little bit of a fight at the gym last year. Some guy bumped the end of the bar as I was squatting and I got very irate. Sometimes I think I overreacted yelling and cussing him immediately like I did, but then I think about how I could have been seriously injured. Anyway, we get in eachother’s faces and shove a little and his friend swings and hits me in the face. I charge him and then others rush in to break it up. It was all very fast and very stupid.

48

i like the dont give advice unless it is asked for. i dont need some putz next to me with arms that look like a wrapped sausage hanging in a butcher shop telling me i need to keep my elbows in on curls. if im in better shape than you dont give me workout tips please.

49

[quote]malonetd wrote:
smt_007 wrote:
For the amount of idiots at the gyms, im surprised there arent many fights at gyms, has anyone seen a fight at a gym?

I was actually in a little bit of a fight at the gym last year. Some guy bumped the end of the bar as I was squatting and I got very irate. Sometimes I think I overreacted yelling and cussing him immediately like I did, but then I think about how I could have been seriously injured. Anyway, we get in eachother’s faces and shove a little and his friend swings and hits me in the face. I charge him and then others rush in to break it up. It was all very fast and very stupid.[/quote]

i dont think you over reacted you really could have fucked your knee or you back up because he wasnt watching where he was going.

50

[quote]djoh615893 wrote:
Mainly the biggest beef seems to be that there are a few too many people going to the gym to hang out, not work. I go to bust my ass, get the shit done right, and leave until next time. That’s why I get pissed when some jackass takes 2 hours to do what could be a 30 minute session on the bench. I mean, how fucking long does a person REALLY need to rest between sets? What the fuck does your job have to do with your next set? Get the hell to work with that bar asshole so I might use it this week!! Maybe there should be some Terry Tate-like dude bashing people into the concrete walls whenever they do stupid shit or waste other’s time needlessly… “You gotta use the bench or go home motherfucker!! Whoooooo!!!”

What a nice thought[/quote]

YES! terry tate is needed in all gyms.

51

Most annoying things to me

  1. standing in front of the dumbell rack to work out.

  2. banging the weights

  3. Asking to work in, sorry if I am a dick about this.

  4. not putting the weights back.

52

Fat Tony wrote:
GYM ETIQUETTE:

11: Personal Trainers are the antichrist.

One of my own golden rules is that I never make a broad generalization about any group of people. I am a personal trainer myself, and I know that most people could give a fuck, but come on. The anticrist. That’s retarded! I have a suggestion to make to all of the PT haters. Get certified and train all the people you want. Take the business of these goofball trainers.

53

[quote]swordthrower wrote:

However, what’s with the naked man phobia? Its a locker room. Are you honestly uncomfortable talking to a naked man? He’s got a dick, you’ve got a dick. Okay. You don’t have to stare at it. I’m not attacking you personally, because I know its a common opinion, it just surprises me how most people feel about nudity.[/quote]

When I get naked in the locker room and my buddy talks to me, I stay in my general area and I do not point Makita at him (Makita, ya know, like the power drill). If I am getting dressed, I continue to get dressed. If I am sitting I continue to sit. If I see my friend across the locker room, I am not going to walk over to him naked or with just a shirt on and have a huge conversation with my balls dangeling. There are a few guys who actually walk around and have huge conversations and shake hands while naked. WTF!

Naked? Fine talk, continue what you were doing, make eye contact, laugh, etc. Don’t walk away from your locker with only a tee shirt on and shake hands with a new person you’ve just met. Don’t walk up to a man when you are naked and he is seated putting on his socks.

It’s not a phobia. I’ve been in prison, I’ve showered with and in front of 50 guys. It’s just common courtesy.

AND I DO NOT WORK AR BURGER KING! I just (used to) go there a lot. Haven’t been there since that photo either.

BTW total weight loss is now 25 lbs. I’m going off on protein shakes and salads and avacados. One candy bar a week. And when the kids want Krispy Kreme, I just lick one and toss it.

I am using virgin territory on my belt! Fresh holes boys! Fresh holes! (wow, haven’t heard that since I was in prison, but that’s another story)

OH! I jupmed up to 50lbs dumbells on my chest press! Don’t make fun, this is a major accomplishment for me, screw you and your 900 pound press. When I heard that distinctive “KLAP” I had an ear to ear smile. It wasn’t the same as the 100lbs weights, but it was almost the same. I’m really diggin this crap.

54

Those are some funny rules!! LOL LOL But they are the truth!!! LOL

One more rule:

If you are a chick with hair past your shoulder, please tight it in a ponytail! And wassup with the earrings, take 'em off?! Are we getting ready for clubbing already? And ummm…when you(those women) are at the gym, don’t be scare to sweat, huh?

55

I’m gonna make a copy of these rules and psot them in my gym.Lmao.

56

[quote]Fat Tony wrote:
I used to be Big Tony, but after doing a one year house arrest stretch, I’ve become FAT Tony.

[/quote]

[quote]Fat Tony wrote:

I’ve been in prison, I’ve showered with and in front of 50 guys.
[/quote]

Sounds like you weren’t a very successful criminal. I hope you’ve chosen a new career path? <:-)

[quote]Fat Tony wrote:

Personal Trainers are the antichrist.

[/quote]

Personal Trainers are not the antichrist. Ronald McDonald may be the antichrist. Jerry Falwell may be the antichrist. But my personal selection for antichrist would be Ernest Angley.

My buddies and I used to love this guy… when we were about 19, I’d wake up all hung over on my bud’s living room floor, and he’d have on Ernest Angley. You could just put your hand on the television screen, and he’d heal you. We saw him live one morning in the QE theater in Vancouver. My buddy phones me up, and says, get your shit together, he’s here NOW. So we do our best cheech and chong imitation all the way down there, fall outa the car in a cloud of smoke… and go in to see him. They didn’t seem to like us much tho…

|/ 3Toes

57

[quote]Brown_Sugar wrote:
Those are some funny rules!! LOL LOL But they are the truth!!! LOL

One more rule:

If you are a chick with hair past your shoulder, please tight it in a ponytail! And wassup with the earrings, take 'em off?! Are we getting ready for clubbing already? And ummm…when you(those women) are at the gym, don’t be scare to sweat, huh?[/quote]

Why? I have short hair so it’s not an issue for me personally, but why does it matter whether or not someone has their hair loose? I would find it got in my way (which is why I have short hair), but if it doesn’t bother that person, what’s the problem?

Same w/ the earrings. I keep mine on, 'cause I keep them on all the time, but unless you need to run over to rescue someone who has gotten her chandeliearrings tangled around the bar, what’s it to you?

I’m w/ you on the sweating though. Of course in my gym most of the men don’t work hard enough to break a sweat either. I feel it’s my responsibility to raise the average on that. :slight_smile:

Martha

58

No cell phones. Unless you’re an emergency authority or medical person on call, leave your cell phone in your locker - let it take a message.

59

The3toedSloth: I was an incredibly successful criminal. Depends on how you measure success. Not getting caught or making obscene amounts of money.

Personally I don’t like faith healers or TV Evangelists. You only need one man to get healed. You only need one man to save you. No middle man reguired. (Jesus)

gojira: No cell phones? I own a machine shop and the Tards I have working for me are lucky I leave them around high speed machinery alone. I need to be on call. Also as a father of a few Tards, and a husband to the Omega Bitch, I need my phone on me. Cell phones should be allowed. Own a business, kids, wife, friends, selling a car in the paper, etc.

60

I have no problem with being naked in the locker room. Or with naked guys being in the locker room. As long as their either moving towards are from the shower. Or are getting dressed.

Did some interval work today so entered the lockerroom quite sweaty. And I was in a hurry, because I was already late for work.

The locker room was completely filled with a dozen of 10 year olds. All getting dressed up to have their judo initiation lesson or something. I was the only adult there. No way was I undressing while they were around. So I just waited for everyone to leave.

…

The little prinses took their sweet time.

…

And when the last one had finally left the lockerroom, and I was completely nakid and about the step into the shower, some late kid barged in. :-/