Who the fuck protects geese and why did they not erect a statue in that kids honor depicting him mid-neck snap
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Maybe he was hungry for foei gras!
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Even for geese, foie gras is brutal. They just ram huge feeding tubes down the gooseās neck and force feed them before killing them. Pretty metal.
Yes, it is a cruel practice. But there again, they couldnāt sell it without a market. 
In the true spirit of this thread thoughā¦ can you imagine a how big a liver would be in a polar bear sized goose? A little gene splicing and we could be rich!
Iām inclined to think that the ability of geese to hurt a healthy adult human has been greatly exaggerated. I get that they are mean and fearless. But they still weigh 14 lbs and are covered in feathers. Any actual injuries are more likely sustained when panicked people trip over their own feet while running away. A healthy man who wants to kill a goose is going to win.
The better question is would you rather face 20 geese or 20 goose sized polar bears ( goose sized means they are scaled down until they weigh 14 lbs)? Do you think you could win either fight?
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Well yeah, I mean- thatās why I made the bird 9 feet tall. Or in the relative weight scenario, like 200 feet tall.
I would think polar bears would be much tougher, as theyāre just far heavier and strongerā¦
And I dunno about winning either fight. Naked in my slippery, empty room? Probably not. But I could definitely do better with geese than dense little fur balls.
This is a no brainer. Iād take my chances with the 20 polar bears. The giant goose would either kill me in a matter of seconds or make me wish I was dead.
Polar bears are not pack hunters, they are nomads, so the 20 little guys wouldnāt coordinate anything and wouldnāt feel emboldened by numbers. They would probably be more stressed out by being forced into close proximity with 19 other bears and they would end up fighting each other while ignoring the giant human.
If polar bears need to they will go for larger prey such as whales or walruses but they would likely be intimidated by the gangly tall human and would steer clear. A bear gets too close and Iād try to scare him off. If that didnāt work, Iād kick him in the skull and that would probably make them all think twice about getting too close.
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I would get fuckin mauled either way so I guess Iād rather see a bunch of cute polar bears before I died
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This thread was fantastic haha funny story: My family owns a small farm, we have/had geese for quite awhile (I despise them) and my grandma, who lives across the field dislikes them as well, always dropping hints about taking them out and cooking them (sheās in her mid 80s, 120lbs and is a salty old rancher) well one day she was over at my folkās place for something or another and two of our geese were wandering around the barn, one was looking awful sickly (supposedly) and my gram asked my mom if sheād like her to ātake careā of that goose for us, my mother responded no and turned to walk into the house, at that point my gram had grabbed a shovel and hauled off and drilled the goose across the top of the head, my mom turned around and gramās response, āOh, I thought you said to go ahead!ā Yeahā¦no, gram. The goose turned out to be mildly concussed is all (this was a regular sized african goose), still torturing our dogs to this day haha
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Iām doing my best to fuck up that polar bear sized goose. Naked ass and all, Iām biting and taking chunks, and trying to get around his neck to suffocate him. As thatās all I can probably do.
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How thick would a bear sized gooseās neck be?
Itās not important. You will never get close enough to find out.
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Definitely thick enough to wrap your arms around, but probably not just your hands.
I could reliably get a bear by the hindfeet and whip it around like a flail. My dog got kicked in the head by a horse once and just shook his head and kept after the horse, so itās not like kicking a tiny bear in the head would do anything but hurt your foot, but the skull on skull impacts would, in aggregate, cause significant damage.
The goose is a matter of bone density. Hit it like you mean it and youāll break whatever you hit. Kick it in the shin. Punch the thing in the head.
Either one would be pretty easy to win. Take them all on and batter the goose with a bear flail.
The bear bludgeon was brought up before, those bears would still be pretty heavy, 25 lbs at minimum. How long could you swing around 25 lbs of dead bear weight? Those legs are like fluffy fat gripz.
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I want to say that Iād only need 19 good swings (20 if I also get to fight the goose). But really, you would need to trade out bears, probably a few times, as your main bear gets too softened up. Maybe thatās the key unknown. How many times do you need to concuss two bears together before one becomes incapacitated, and how many more times before neither is effective as a bludgeon any more? I guess it does need more thought.
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Regardless of bone density, the goose has got the clear advantage. One peck to head/ neck and you are going down! Bleeding, in heaping pile of shit. Once subdued the little bears will rip your carcass to sheds 
Youāre a goner either way!
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This made me lol.
By the way, youāve forgotten one key point.
The slippery floor. No way youāre swinging 25 lbs of dead meat without slipping. And if you end up on the ground, youāre dead.
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How hyuge would a bear sized-goose shit be. Thatās be enough to take you out.
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1 goose. Only because numbers game and ego will always favour me vs 1 no matter what.