Would You Marry A Porn Star?

Off Topic
41

Oh…I forgot the ultimate “dodge” question that was/is thrown out…

“Would I want my daughter to do Porn?”

No…

Because the buisness is dangerous, (both mentally and physically)…it tends to be very “throw-away” when they are “through” with you (you get “old” by your late twenties and certainly by your early thirties)…and its been proven to be a world wrought with drug addiction and suicide…

BUT THAT IS NOT THE QUESTION THAT I’M ASKING! What one SHOULD ask me is THIS:

“Would I want someone to Love, cherish and give their all to my Daughter when she decided to quit the Biz…and not continue to judge her for what she did?” (…“casting the first stone” stuff…)

The answer to THAT is an unequivocal “Yes…”

Mufasa

42

I’ve gotten a couple of “WTF…?” type of PM’s that I wanted to respond to…

What got me thinking about this was an “E, TRUE HOLLYWOOD STORY” on a Porn Star…(and it appears she was a BIG Porn Star) who went by the name “Savannah”…

What struck me were a few things:

  1. Her big blue eyes and natural beauty…and her “girl-next-door” background and looks as she went to Hollywood to “make it”…

  2. How that natural beauty and innocence worked against her as she was steadily “sucked in” by those who could help her “make it big”…and how in a search for Love she was used by the famous (Gregg Allman and Vince Neil to name a few) to any sleaze-bag wanting to make a buck…and how by the age of about 24 she comitted suicide in her garage…

For her, just a SMALL amount of TRUE love, acceptance and understanding would have gone a long way…

(By the way…her real name was Shannon Michelle Wisley for all you “connissuers of Porn” and for those who care…)

So…that’s what prompted the thread…

Mufasa

43

If she was no longer in the business, then yes I would.

And no, the people who view the porn aren’t any ‘better’ than the actors.

–
JMB

44

My feelings EXACTLY, JMB…

Mufasa

45

I have nothing against porn stars but I would not marry one.

46

Chewman said it best. Hail!

47

" I have nothing against porn stars but I would not marry one…"

Fair enough, rich44…

But doesn’t that mean you DO have something against them?

(One of my posse said the EXACT same thing…)

Mufasa

48

Great thread, Mufasa!

I like watching naked women moan and groan on my computer monitor.

The girl you describe is basically the perfect girl. Has everything a man would want in a woman.

I would definitely marry her (if I subscribed to said practice).

49

I really hate when I go to start watching a porn and my family is all home and I forget to turn the volume down. I hate that.

50

[quote]Mufasa wrote:
Is the person who buys, downloads, saves, sells, wacks-off to and is almost “addicted” to porn a “better” person than the performer? [/quote]

Well, people have to figure out if there is a “good” or “bad” in life. If we’re just a collection of cells responding to various physical laws in the universe, then there is no good or bad, no right or wrong.

However, if you don’t believe in an entirely relativistic universe, then you can make some kind of separation between good, bad, better, and worse. I would have to think that watching pornographic material and letting your ass get pounded by man after man would have to be different things. One person is watching their fantasies getting acted out and the other one is a whore (one who receives money for sex). One is viewing porn in the privacy of their own home and the other is exhibiting themselves for the world to see. To say that they take the same mental makeup to do is absurd.

I am positive that the average psychological profile of the average porn watcher (i.e. 98% of the population, the other 2% which lied :slight_smile: ) is healthier than that of the average porn star. From nearly any non-relativistic view, though, there is very little difference in how “bad” viewing porn and participating in porn are. Off the top of my head, though, making porn could be considered “worse” by Christian standards, but that is the only religion I have intimate knowledge enough of to comment on.

I do not look down on those that do porn or those that watch porn. I do, however, believe that selling your sexuality for money (strippers, porn stars, etc.) will mess you up. I guarantee that it does - if it doesn’t, you were pretty far gone to begin with. I promise.

51

[quote]JMB wrote:

And no, the people who view the porn aren’t any ‘better’ than the actors.

–
JMB[/quote]

So watching someone bang 100 people in a row is the same as actually doing it. I don’t think so.

52

[quote]StevenF wrote:
I really hate when I go to start watching a porn and my family is all home and I forget to turn the volume down. I hate that. [/quote]

ROFLMAO!

53

I find it difficult to accept the premises of the hypothetical – namely the fact that a woman who was perfectly normal in every other way got into the business for a short time and then got out. I just don’t see that as realistic.

With that caveat, I don’t know that I could. The woman finds herself in a Catch-22 situation, in that she is scared of revealing the information sooner in the relationship because she is scared of the reaction. However, she creates a large implicit trust issue by witholding that extremely relevant information for so long – and the trust issue would tip the balance for me in terms of whether I would want a long-term relationship.

54

Okay, skipping past a few recent items, I’d have to think, yeah, sure, given she was healthy and all that, why not. I am not beholden to the past. Whether or not I’m likely to ever find myself in this scenario is besides the point.

To those that raise the spectre of boring her in the sack, hey, if she was bored, she shouldn’t be wanting to get married anyway.

So, I’d assume things were alright in that respect before anyone would get into discussing marriage seriously.

I question though whether undefined items such as her character would be such that she could hold my attention. I guess, assuming there was such a woman, who wasn’t trampy or otherwise a living spectatle with serious issues, I can’t see why not.

However, I’d really want to make sure she had it all out of her system.

A return foray into the trade would not be something I’d be very comfortable with. You know, drinking a beer with the guys while they throw on the older porn just to get your goat would be bad enough, but if there was new stuff they could drive you psycho with… oh, I can just imagine.

I’m guessing I’d lose a few friends who’d think it was okay to harrass her or hit on her all the time because of her past, because that would really get on my nerves too – I don’t go around hitting on my friends wives.

So, I guess I’d get into martial arts or something to deal with the dimwits while the two of us were out and she gets recognized… hehehehe. My family is pretty accepting so I don’t think there would be any issues there – as long as she wasn’t flaunting her past inappropriately.

You know, this entire question boils down into a sub-question. Would you marry a former stripper? It’s potentially the same issue with respect to friends, family and so on.

If the person has the right qualities, now, then the past isn’t too important to me. Some people can change and grow – even though I’d have to agree the odds are low. The fact many don’t doesn’t mean it isn’t possible.

55

[quote]BostonBarrister wrote:
I find it difficult to accept the premises of the hypothetical – namely the fact that a woman who was perfectly normal in every other way got into the business for a short time and then got out. I just don’t see that as realistic.

[/quote]

He said it better than I did.

56

[quote]basementD wrote:
JMB wrote:

And no, the people who view the porn aren’t any ‘better’ than the actors.

–
JMB

So watching someone bang 100 people in a row is the same as actually doing it. I don’t think so. [/quote]

No, it isn’t ‘the same.’ For instance the psychological and emotional effects of selling yourself in this manner are probably much worse for the actor than the mere customer.

However, in viewing pornography we implicitly support its production, and we can’t claim to be ‘superior’ to those who produce a product we consume.

–
JMB

57

[quote]JMB wrote:
basementD wrote:
JMB wrote:

And no, the people who view the porn aren’t any ‘better’ than the actors.

–
JMB

So watching someone bang 100 people in a row is the same as actually doing it. I don’t think so.

No, it isn’t ‘the same.’ For instance the psychological and emotional effects of selling yourself in this manner are probably much worse for the actor than the mere customer.

However, in viewing pornography we implicitly support its production, and we can’t claim to be ‘superior’ to those who produce a product we consume.

–
JMB
[/quote]

JMB,

I hear what you are saying. Its a tough topic and I don’t think there is a black and white answer.

Maybe it depends on the individual, because we all have different motivations.

Some people are addicted to porn, some people look at it sometime, some people buy it, some get it for free.

I like looking at naked women as much as the next guy, but I don’t want my wife or (daughter if I had one), to make a living in porn.

I think porn is just entertainment for some of us, like watching the show jackass doesn’t mean you want to do stunts or that you don’t think the guys doing the stunts are complete morons.

Watching boxing or an action movie doesn’t mean that you support violence.

You can be entertained by something and think the entertainers are lacking in areas (morality, intelligence, etc) that you are not.

This seems to be a gray area issue because I know the porn stars wouldn’t have work if people didn’t view their movies.

58

[quote]BostonBarrister wrote:
I find it difficult to accept the premises of the hypothetical – namely the fact that a woman who was perfectly normal in every other way got into the business for a short time and then got out. I just don’t see that as realistic.[/quote]

Potential truth is stranger than potential fiction - look at the politics threads and tell me you can’t apply what you just stated above :slight_smile:

[quote]
With that caveat, I don’t know that I could. The woman finds herself in a Catch-22 situation, in that she is scared of revealing the information sooner in the relationship because she is scared of the reaction. However, she creates a large implicit trust issue by witholding that extremely relevant information for so long – and the trust issue would tip the balance for me in terms of whether I would want a long-term relationship. [/quote]

But this is the same for lots of people; pretty much everone has done something in their lives that another person would have issues with. Similarly, you don’t start a relationship [on a friends level] by telling someone all your secrets - strangely enough this develops over time.

A secret is a secret is a secret - for a start, even if you think you know someone extremely well you cannot always guarantee that you know how they’ll react to something you tell them. For example, I’ve seen extremely fundamentalist christians barely raise an eyebrow when a gay friend came out to them [something the gay friend agonised about for ages]. Trust in the instance of a secret is something tha that not only implies trust of the other person, but also trust of your own feelings and emotions.

To answer the question:

No problem - it’s hard enough finding a sweet, smart, attractive fun person without worrying about stuff that happened in the past that you have no control over.

People should also be careful not to make ad hominem comments about a person based on their profession - otherwise, the legitimate question could be raised would you marry someone who used to be a politician??

heh :slight_smile:

59

Yes …why not. If she fits all the characteristics that i seek in a partner, I sure would…she could still be acting for all i care. It is acting!!! Love and sex are two totally different things. It is quite funny how most of america will judge them…but most of america is watching porn on a regular basis. People are afraid to admit who they really are and quite frankly that is one of the major problems …hypocrasy. The moral majority is so full of hypocrasy. These girls are in it today for the money it is big business, in the past more of them had issues that lead them to this life but today they are business people who are comfortable with their sexualality, more power to them. I am sure some are still doing it for something in their past,

60

I have noodled this one quite a bit and can state with absolute resolve no fucking way.

Marriage is hard work. Anyone who tells you that it is not is lying. Adding kids to the equation can make it even more challenging.

The last thing on earth I would want is something lurking in my wife’s past that is almost certain to rear it’s ugly head in a manner that has the potential to be very damaging to the family.

Additionally, I have never met a stripper who did not have bats in the bell tower.

You would be completely unable to convince me that a woman who made a career, however brief, out of porn is a well adjusted person without some serious issues that will at some point need to be addressed. How this will play itself out down the road is something I am disinterested in sticking around to find out.

I just cannot formulate a scenario in my mind that leads to a happy ending…unless she changes careers and becomes a massage therapist…heh.