“Welcome, Messrs Presidents. I am Dana Perino and on behalf of the entire White House staff I would like to say what a historic gathering this is, with all five living presidents of the United States coming together, in peace and harmony, to eat lunch. Bon appetit!”
“Hey, what was that foreign stuff? Has the Secret Service checked out that broad? Who is she anyway?”
“She’s your White House press secretary, Dubya, but if you don’t recognise her by now, it’s not worth bothering, son.”
“Aw, c’mon, dad - stop puttin’ me down. Why do you always have to put me down?”
“Gentlemen, as President Elect it is one of my goals to create harmony between the generations, so that young and old, from coast to coast, can join together to promote change we need. We don’t have a generational problem, we don’t have a Republican problem, we don’t have a Democrat problem, we have only an American problem”…
“Say, dad, is this guy for real?.. Yo, Clinton!”
“Hi, there, Dubya. I was just wondering, do you happen to have Sarah Palin’s number? I thought she and I might get together over dinner, do some cross-party co-operation across the aisle, if ya get ma drift. Say, is that Jimmy Carter? Hi, Jimmy, I thought you were dead.”
“Hi, y’all. Have I had my lunch?”
“Dad, do we have to do this? I mean, does Carter really count as a living president?”
“Is Ronnie Reagan here yet?”
“No, Jimmy, he won’t be coming. Barack, would you like to say grace?”
"My pleasure… Dear Lord, we thank you for your great goodness in gifting me to America so that I may heal its wounds, nationalise its banks and walk upon its waters.
May our people remain humble despite the greatness and charisma of their new leader and may they never forget to whom they owe their good fortune - and you had a part in it too.
Bless all 57 states of the Union - or, heck, am I thinking baked beans? May Chicago continue to have the best politicians money can buy…"