Worst Parenting... Ever

Off Topic
201

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]MaliMedved wrote:
She is ENJOYING it, and that’s the fucking problem. Not the sauce, not the shower. Not the belt that your mommy and daddy used, not the soap. If they discipline you for your sake, it’s ok. If they did it for fun, than it’s not ok.

The bitch is bullying her kid, apparently not for the first time. And from what I understand, he is not even her own.

The kid is helpless and he is getting his soul fucked.
Is it that hard to figure this out?[/quote]

I didn’t see anything in that making it seem like she was having a blast.[/quote]

Really? Tone of voice, body language, the way she was talking to him?
'Why did you lie to me? What happens when you lie to me?

  • I get hot sauce.
    You get hot sauce!’

The way she yells at him while he has to keep his mouth closed as to not spit out the stuff? Even though he does or says nothing disrespectful at any point?
The fact that she is making him take off her clothes and proceeds to yell at him while he is naked in the cold water, crying?

No?
Well, I guess it’s ok, then.

202

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]SkyzykS wrote:

[quote]SteelyD wrote:

If you’ve gone to ‘hot sauce and cold showers’ as the “standard” punishment for a 5 year old (or so), you’ve already lost.[/quote]

Very true. What also seems to be lost is discipline in the form of motivation to do right and good.

Taking it directly to physical punishment with complete disregard for any other approach or forms of behavior modification is just ignorant.

[/quote]

These are all ASSUMPTIONS. You don’t know anything about how many times this kid has done the same thing or whether other things were tried in the past. You saw ONE clip a few minutes long and deduced the kid’s entire history with that family?[/quote]

I understand what you’re saying here. However, the kid knew the drill. These punishments weren’t the first time.

203

[quote]Professor X wrote:
These are all ASSUMPTIONS. You don’t know anything about how many times this kid has done the same thing or whether other things were tried in the past. You saw ONE clip a few minutes long and deduced the kid’s entire history with that family?[/quote]

I also read she has had no documented issues with any of her other five children.

204

[quote]therajraj wrote:

[/quote]
I just realised that the title of that movie was from the Mormon’s new PR Campaign.

205

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]spiderman739 wrote:

All it should take is a slap on the hand or bottom. If a parent has gotten to the point where they are having to think of inventive ways to punish their child, they have taken it too far.[/quote]

I would LOVE to see that work on some of these kids in the projects or lower income backgrounds. What if they pull a gun on you for that slap on the wrist?
[/quote]

Then he could not walk for around a month I guess.

206

“I want him to obey”.

Get a well trained dog you cunt.

Funny, I’m a parent to 3 boys, from 20, 18 and 4. I never once thought of wanting them to “obey” - her words. Even during a troubling time with one, I am not looking for “obey”, but good decision making.

OBEY. She said it. You think I’m cherry picking? Listen to this broad. She has issues. And she is clearly ESCALATING her responses b/c her style of parenting is NOT working. What’s next, put pepper spray in your mouth b/c the hot sauce is no longer effective? Waterboarding b/c the cold shower doesn’t do it?

You guys don’t get it. Violence has never been a means to elicit compliance. Just b/c you were subject to some measure of it growing up, is not evidence that it works. It does NOT work. If it did work, it would be THE answer, and getting good kids would only be a matter of finding the right measure of beatings for that child. Ridiculous.

OBEY. RUN ALONG NOW AND GO OBEY.

207

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]MementoMori wrote:

Fact is the worst part is the kid was a passenger in his own life with no influence over the consequences. When I was a kid my parents asked why, they listened, then they decided on punishment.[/quote]

Your parents asked why? If you were 8 years old and your parents told you NOT to go down the street by yourself and you did, they shouldn’t be asking you why. They should be reprimanding you for disobeying orders. When did kids suddenly start getting in on the parenting? Little kids are for the most part passengers in their lives because their parents take care of them. They aren’t paying bills, cooking meals or anything else.[/quote]

I figured thats how my statement would be interepreted. Fact is the woman just railroaded him. She didn’t ask him what happened she asked him scripted questions and he gave scripted answers. That back and forth has clearly happened a 100 times before and will happen again. That kid has zero autonomy.

My parents definitely asked me why I did what I did. Much easier to punish a child when you address his motives rather than his actions.

If the kid went down the street to play punish him.
If he went down the street because the dog got out or because he thought he was doing mom a favour trying to get the mail, teach him why it was unsafe so he knows not to do it again.

208

[quote]MementoMori wrote:

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]MementoMori wrote:

Fact is the worst part is the kid was a passenger in his own life with no influence over the consequences. When I was a kid my parents asked why, they listened, then they decided on punishment.[/quote]

Your parents asked why? If you were 8 years old and your parents told you NOT to go down the street by yourself and you did, they shouldn’t be asking you why. They should be reprimanding you for disobeying orders. When did kids suddenly start getting in on the parenting? Little kids are for the most part passengers in their lives because their parents take care of them. They aren’t paying bills, cooking meals or anything else.[/quote]

I figured thats how my statement would be interepreted. Fact is the woman just railroaded him. She didn’t ask him what happened she asked him scripted questions and he gave scripted answers. That back and forth has clearly happened a 100 times before and will happen again. That kid has zero autonomy.

My parents definitely asked me why I did what I did. Much easier to punish a child when you address his motives rather than his actions.

If the kid went down the street to play punish him.
If he went down the street because the dog got out or because he thought he was doing mom a favour trying to get the mail, teach him why it was unsafe so he knows not to do it again.
[/quote]

If my parents told me at 8 years old not to go down a certain street, it didn’t matter WHY I went down that street anyway. They know of risks I may not be aware of, even if the fucking dog ran off. They would have wanted me to go get them and tell them the dog got out, not go on a quest myself in territory they warned me against.

I am all for teaching a kid what they did wrong, but more often than not, no kid under the age of 12 is going to be trusted on their own judgment to go against rules.

It seems like you have been raised to think little children should be [part of decision making processes. They shouldn’t in my opinion.

If I tell a little kid don’t eat that cookie and they do, it doesn’t fucking matter WHY they ate. They disobeyed an order and that order was made for a reason that a little child may not be able to understand…which is why they have PARENTS.

209

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:
“I want him to obey”.

Get a well trained dog you cunt.

Funny, I’m a parent to 3 boys, from 20, 18 and 4. I never once thought of wanting them to “obey” - her words. Even during a troubling time with one, I am not looking for “obey”, but good decision making.

OBEY. She said it. You think I’m cherry picking? Listen to this broad. She has issues. And she is clearly ESCALATING her responses b/c her style of parenting is NOT working. What’s next, put pepper spray in your mouth b/c the hot sauce is no longer effective? Waterboarding b/c the cold shower doesn’t do it?

You guys don’t get it. Violence has never been a means to elicit compliance. Just b/c you were subject to some measure of it growing up, is not evidence that it works. It does NOT work. If it did work, it would be THE answer, and getting good kids would only be a matter of finding the right measure of beatings for that child. Ridiculous.

OBEY. RUN ALONG NOW AND GO OBEY.[/quote]

I think she’s made this kid her biggest stress rather than them actually being the biggest stress. The most ridiculous thing is that the child wasn’t even being punished for getting into trouble at school, it’s for lying about what he’s in trouble for. She already knew of the infractions, the child just didn’t want to speak of them because he was scared. Rather than simply punishing him she chose to draw out the process over something that was really a moot point, especially since she could just contact the school.

210

[quote]goldengloves wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:
“I want him to obey”.

Get a well trained dog you cunt.

Funny, I’m a parent to 3 boys, from 20, 18 and 4. I never once thought of wanting them to “obey” - her words. Even during a troubling time with one, I am not looking for “obey”, but good decision making.

OBEY. She said it. You think I’m cherry picking? Listen to this broad. She has issues. And she is clearly ESCALATING her responses b/c her style of parenting is NOT working. What’s next, put pepper spray in your mouth b/c the hot sauce is no longer effective? Waterboarding b/c the cold shower doesn’t do it?

You guys don’t get it. Violence has never been a means to elicit compliance. Just b/c you were subject to some measure of it growing up, is not evidence that it works. It does NOT work. If it did work, it would be THE answer, and getting good kids would only be a matter of finding the right measure of beatings for that child. Ridiculous.

OBEY. RUN ALONG NOW AND GO OBEY.[/quote]

I think she’s made this kid her biggest stress rather than them actually being the biggest stress. The most ridiculous thing is that the child wasn’t even being punished for getting into trouble at school, it’s for lying about what he’s in trouble for. She already knew of the infractions, the child just didn’t want to speak of them because he was scared. Rather than simply punishing him she chose to draw out the process over something that was really a moot point, especially since she could just contact the school.
[/quote]

You serious? Weren’t the notes she was speaking of having to do with poor conduct in school? That is why they were color coded…so no, he was not just getting reprimanded for only lying but for being in trouble to start with.

Wait…so the people on this board did NOT get in trouble for bad report cards or poor conduct? What did your parents do? Pat you on the head and say how great you were?

211

[quote]Professor X wrote:
If I tell a little kid don’t eat that cookie and they do, it doesn’t fucking matter WHY they ate. They disobeyed an order and that order was made for a reason that a little child may not be able to understand…which is why they have PARENTS.[/quote]

Off to the SHOWERS for that little fuckface!

212

[quote]Professor X wrote:

Wait…so the people on this board did NOT get in trouble for bad report cards or poor conduct? What did your parents do? Pat you on the head and say how great you were?
[/quote]

Would you like a real answer, or is these rhetorical questions?

213

My parents used guilt as a form of psychological warfare on us to keep us in line…it’s the Roman Catholic way lol…and the belt now and again. A little bit of fear goes along way.

When my son started playing organized hockey at four or five I explained to him at his first practice if he ever acts up when the coach is talking or he just fucks around out there not giving his best effort during drills I’ll come out on the ice and make him apologize to the coach for wasting his time. You owe it to the coaches cause they do this on their own time. If you fuck up trying no biggie but if it’s from lack of effort and your being a little prick out there it’s different and you pay the price. He said okay and skated about five feet and fell on his ass lol. He wasen’t the best player out on the ice but he always skated hard.

Was I being harsh on him? btw that was exactly the language I used, that’s not so good but I wanted to prove a point…soap did nothing for my potty mouth growing up lol.

DJHT, I would have freaked!

214

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:
“I want him to obey”.

Get a well trained dog you cunt.

Funny, I’m a parent to 3 boys, from 20, 18 and 4. I never once thought of wanting them to “obey” - her words. Even during a troubling time with one, I am not looking for “obey”, but good decision making.

OBEY. She said it. You think I’m cherry picking? Listen to this broad. She has issues. And she is clearly ESCALATING her responses b/c her style of parenting is NOT working. What’s next, put pepper spray in your mouth b/c the hot sauce is no longer effective? Waterboarding b/c the cold shower doesn’t do it? [/quote]

Do you feel that acting out in school and then lying about it at home constitutes good decision making?

She isn’t asking for a robot or a slave, she wants her child to follow her rules - rules that involve telling the truth, behaving in school, following the instructions of those placed in charge of him and making “good choices”.

Being a father, you should know that children are oftentimes unable to think about situations well enough to exercise good decision making. That is why adults set rules: bedtimes, vegetable eating, finishing homework before watching TV, etc. Children are expected to abide by these standards (i.e., OBEY) because at a young age they are unable to either recognize the consequences of their actions or lack the discipline to make the choices most beneficial to them.

I agree with much of what you have said so far, but this objection is a weak one.

215

[quote]bond james bond wrote:
My parents used guilt as a form of psychological warfare on us to keep us in line…it’s the Roman Catholic way lol…and the belt now and again. A little bit of fear goes along way.

When my son started playing organized hockey at four or five I explained to him at his first practice if he ever acts up when the coach is talking or he just fucks around out there not giving his best effort during drills I’ll come out on the ice and make him apologize to the coach for wasting his time. You owe it to the coaches cause they do this on their own time. If you fuck up trying no biggie but if it’s from lack of effort and your being a little prick out there it’s different and you pay the price. He said okay and skated about five feet and fell on his ass lol. He wasen’t the best player out on the ice but he always skated hard.

Was I being harsh on him? btw that was exactly the language I used, that’s not so good but I wanted to prove a point…soap did nothing for my potty mouth growing up lol.

DJHT, I would have freaked!
[/quote]

Oh it got worse, I had the hood up and luckly some nice young guys had cables and jumped off the car. However we get home and the 14 year old starts pitching a fit because she couldnt go out with her friends. So she starts screaming to the top of her lungs how she hates this house and slams her bedroom door. I kind of lost it for a bit with anger.

216

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]goldengloves wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:
“I want him to obey”.

Get a well trained dog you cunt.

Funny, I’m a parent to 3 boys, from 20, 18 and 4. I never once thought of wanting them to “obey” - her words. Even during a troubling time with one, I am not looking for “obey”, but good decision making.

OBEY. She said it. You think I’m cherry picking? Listen to this broad. She has issues. And she is clearly ESCALATING her responses b/c her style of parenting is NOT working. What’s next, put pepper spray in your mouth b/c the hot sauce is no longer effective? Waterboarding b/c the cold shower doesn’t do it?

You guys don’t get it. Violence has never been a means to elicit compliance. Just b/c you were subject to some measure of it growing up, is not evidence that it works. It does NOT work. If it did work, it would be THE answer, and getting good kids would only be a matter of finding the right measure of beatings for that child. Ridiculous.

OBEY. RUN ALONG NOW AND GO OBEY.[/quote]

I think she’s made this kid her biggest stress rather than them actually being the biggest stress. The most ridiculous thing is that the child wasn’t even being punished for getting into trouble at school, it’s for lying about what he’s in trouble for. She already knew of the infractions, the child just didn’t want to speak of them because he was scared. Rather than simply punishing him she chose to draw out the process over something that was really a moot point, especially since she could just contact the school.
[/quote]

You serious? Weren’t the notes she was speaking of having to do with poor conduct in school? That is why they were color coded…so no, he was not just getting reprimanded for only lying but for being in trouble to start with.

Wait…so the people on this board did NOT get in trouble for bad report cards or poor conduct? What did your parents do? Pat you on the head and say how great you were?[/quote]

I’m not sure what this guy is getting at. The kid was going to be disciplined for acting out in school and his punishment was made worse by his lies over what transpired.

If he fessed up, the punishment wouldn’t have been as severe, because clearly the mother took issue with him lying to her face.

My parents did the same thing when I was a kid. Asking me if I did something to see if I could fess up to my mistakes. It generally went over better when I did, because at least I was taking responsibility for my actions and showing them enough respect to be truthful, which they respected in turn.

Yes, she could have just contacted the school (I guess they contacted her), but the kid needs to recognize that lying when you fuck up only makes things worse.

217

[quote]Professor X wrote:

It seems like you have been raised to think little children should be [part of decision making processes. They shouldn’t in my opinion.

If I tell a little kid don’t eat that cookie and they do, it doesn’t fucking matter WHY they ate. They disobeyed an order and that order was made for a reason that a little child may not be able to understand…which is why they have PARENTS.[/quote]

Bingo. I used to ask my kids if they wanted X, Y or Z for dinner…between the 2 of them, they could not ever agree and one if not both were always upset at the outcome and I could never seem to recover. I’ve made this mistake, but it is a particular style that does not work. Parents feel they are making a more well rounded, decisive child if they are consulted about a lot of decisions…they end up being narcissistic in the end moreso than a regular child.

Now, they get what I give them for lunch or dinner. No arguing, and they better appreciate it…like it or not!

218

I used to work for Child Protective Services, I have two kids of my own, and I was physically and mentally abused as a child. With that said, I don’t know where I stand on the actual punishment. To have to take it that far probably means you are a shitty parent to begin with. There is no way things should escalate to that point with a freaking 8 year old. If he loved his parents, if he had been taught right from wrong (as opposed to punished or not punished) then her disappointment would go a long way in controlling the kid’s behavior.

I think the psychological effects of what this woman is doing is going to be way worse on the kid than the hot sauce and cold showers. There is no way that kid feels loved in that home. There is no way he understands that he is being punished because it is his parents’ job to make him grow up to be a good person. All he’ll ever understand is that his mom is mean and doesn’t care about him, only about her rules.

Our previous CPS judge would have taken the kids from her, but our new one probably would just make her do parenting classes and individual therapy. Either way, the state would get involved in her life.

219

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]goldengloves wrote:

[quote]TheBodyGuard wrote:
“I want him to obey”.

Get a well trained dog you cunt.

Funny, I’m a parent to 3 boys, from 20, 18 and 4. I never once thought of wanting them to “obey” - her words. Even during a troubling time with one, I am not looking for “obey”, but good decision making.

OBEY. She said it. You think I’m cherry picking? Listen to this broad. She has issues. And she is clearly ESCALATING her responses b/c her style of parenting is NOT working. What’s next, put pepper spray in your mouth b/c the hot sauce is no longer effective? Waterboarding b/c the cold shower doesn’t do it?

You guys don’t get it. Violence has never been a means to elicit compliance. Just b/c you were subject to some measure of it growing up, is not evidence that it works. It does NOT work. If it did work, it would be THE answer, and getting good kids would only be a matter of finding the right measure of beatings for that child. Ridiculous.

OBEY. RUN ALONG NOW AND GO OBEY.[/quote]

I think she’s made this kid her biggest stress rather than them actually being the biggest stress. The most ridiculous thing is that the child wasn’t even being punished for getting into trouble at school, it’s for lying about what he’s in trouble for. She already knew of the infractions, the child just didn’t want to speak of them because he was scared. Rather than simply punishing him she chose to draw out the process over something that was really a moot point, especially since she could just contact the school.
[/quote]

You serious? Weren’t the notes she was speaking of having to do with poor conduct in school? That is why they were color coded…so no, he was not just getting reprimanded for only lying but for being in trouble to start with.

Wait…so the people on this board did NOT get in trouble for bad report cards or poor conduct? What did your parents do? Pat you on the head and say how great you were?
[/quote]

The whole video she said “this is what happens when you lie” so I suppose that’s sufficient enough evidence to assume he was being punished for lying rather than his poor behavior.

I got disciplined as a child and I’ll be disciplining my children. However, my punishment was meant to serve a purpose rather than give my parents a chance to relish in their authority over me. They also used the punishment effectively and didn’t have the intention of simply discomforting me like putting hot sauce in my mouth or putting me in a cold shower.They’d do whatever possible to help me not make the same mistake again rather than aimlessly punishing me too. I suppose that’s the difference between a parent wanting to punish their child and a parent wanting to discipline their child.

220

[quote]Professor X wrote:

[quote]spiderman739 wrote:

If you are talking about kids from housing estates, projects, or rough areas then of course it is a very different kettle of fish. [/quote]

Bullshit. It is either right ALL OF THE TIME or wrong ALL OF THE TIME. You can’t say it is ok for Anthony in the projects you not ok for Edward in Bellaire. This is why some of us are calling “hypocrite” to some of these responses. I was reprimanded and spanked. I don’t think I turned out wrong at all.

We live in a country where most of you claim the youth of today have issues with being weak yet those same people apparently want kids raised with zero physical discipline.[/quote]

It is not" bullshit" as you s eloquently put it :wink: And there was more involved with what I was saying.

Here is the rest of what I was saying.

[quote]
If you are talking about kids from housing estates, projects, or rough areas then of course it is a very different kettle of fish. If kids are armed with guns then you have greater issues to deal with than finding the best form of punishment for them. Those kids are more in need of a leg up in society and a way of getting out of the situation they are in before thinking about punishment.[/quote]

As you can see, the point I was making is that if a kid has a gun, you have bigger issues to deal with then how to punish them. If a kid has reached the stage that they would pull a gun on their parent for spanking them (not on me or anyone else as people shouldn’t be spanking another persons child), you have bigger issues to deal with. Of course you would never see me tryigng to spank an inner city kid or anyother kid, from anywhere in the world that isn’t related to me.

Being for some physical punishment and against others is totally acceptable. It is not black and white. Hitting a kid on the back of the legs with an open hand, and hitting them on the back of the legs with a stick are completely different things.