[quote]Brant_Drake wrote:
Short version of BD in jail, part 1.
One night I went out with a friend whose mom had tried to commit suicide. Needless to say he was depressed so we drank a lot.
I came to in in a jail cell drooling on my arm as I lay sprawled out on the floor. Luckily they had a clock on the wall, so I could determine it was about 4 in the morning.
“Why an I in a jail cell at 4 in the morning?” my poor abused brain asked. I decided that passing out again was a good idea.
I awake some hours later to discover I was in the drunk tank with 3 illegals, 1 tranny, and one guy who insisted his name was “taterbread.” Whatever. I decide to do pushups. People move away from me.
I also realize I am wearing a shirt that is not mine. Come to think of it, neither are the pants or shoes. And I have . . .7 drivers licenses in my pocket. None of them are mine.
SMACK! Apparently I have passed out again and was woken up by a brown bag meal smacking me in the face. The guards have good aim. I open the bag and find a sandwich and some strawberry milk. I bite into my sandwich to find that they have not removed the plastic sheath from the cheese. Assholes.
I am still hungry.
I ask the Illegal next to me “Ya gunna eat that sandwich?” in what I think is a polite, friendly tone, but is probably a pseudo-rapist growl. He gives me his sandwich.
I forgot about the cheese wrapper before I bite into this one also.
I am released. I find out that I told the cop to arrest me, and my official charge is “Defrauding an Innkeeper.” And I owe the state $60 for breaking a pair of handcuffs.
[/quote]
That’s awesome. That’s a reason to drink right there.
I’ve had a few. Too many drunk and disorderly to remember, 2 DUI, and a couple of assaults and whatnot.
Sentencing
Assault#1- Two weeks awaiting bond, 2 years probation
Assault#2- 5 days awaiting bond, 2 years probation.
DUI- (since they occured within a week and I was tried for both simultaneously, I got 2 first offenses) 4 days in jail and 2 years probation, $2500 in fines and costs.
[quote]Artem wrote:
That’s awesome. That’s a reason to drink right there.[/quote]
Not really. About a month later I had to take a shower with a guy named pretty rikki. He talked about his favorite cereals, how to build a ghetto battering ram, and cocaine dealing.
[quote]dk44 wrote:
solidchaos73 wrote:
got arrested last year for manufacturing bombs, illegal weapons in motor vehicle, reckless endangerment and breach of peace…fun shit haha. Luckily i had a good lawyer and got off with 2 years probation and one year suspended sentence!
Are you sad that they are shutting down Guantanamo? Where do you think they are gonna send you?[/quote]
i was in the holding cells from Friday or Saturday afternoon to Monday morning and they didnt give me shit. my mom came by and brought me some stuff tho so it was all good but still.
plus i had to sleep on this fucking metal slab w/ no blanket so i was like trying to fit as much of myself as i could in my shirt. good thing back then i weighed 170, and wore my shirts bout 3 sizes too big.
[quote]Brant_Drake wrote:
I awake some hours later to discover I was in the drunk tank with 3 illegals, 1 tranny, and one guy who insisted his name was “taterbread.” Whatever. I decide to do pushups. People move away from me.
[/quote]
Don’t they keep that shit separate from the rest of the population? I remember going into county, and there being two tranny hookers in a separate cell, the funny thing was that we all were checking them out as we went down the line, the guards had to keep reassuring everyone that they weren’t females. It was actually pretty funny.
[quote]LiveFromThe781 wrote:
StevenF wrote:
LiveFromThe781 wrote:
Itchy wrote:
I got arrested for DUI a couple years ago. Funny thing was, I had just gone to the store to get some beer and hadn’t had a chance to drink it yet.
Word to the wise–the cops don’t like it when you call them “dude”.
they dont like it when you run away, taunt them and when they tackle you tell them “not to scuff your fucking shoes” either
[quote]Brant_Drake wrote:
Artem wrote:
That’s awesome. That’s a reason to drink right there.
Not really. About a month later I had to take a shower with a guy named pretty rikki. He talked about his favorite cereals, how to build a ghetto battering ram, and cocaine dealing.[/quote]
Haha these are funny stories. One time I was in court and I heard a judge read out a guy’s charges. There had to be 10 of them and one was “bribing an officer” or something like that. It was kinda funny.
One time I woke up to see flashing lights and I had cops knocking on my windsield. I openned the door and they pulled me out of the truck and asked me if I had been drinking. There were 2 empty boxes of 211 12 packs in the passenger seat. I was like “yeah.”
I had pulled up and parked in my friend’s front yard instead of the driveway. The cop pulls some cotton out of my front grill and ask “how did this get here?” They called my dad to come bitch me out and I got lucky. They let me go. Being a minor is sweet…
been there…I’d like to use the ol’ youth excuse. But it’s actually something I think everyone should go through in some form or another…you know, to appreciate what you may be taking for granted.
Disturbing the Peace,
DUI- I scored a .25! hell to the yeah!
But a guy threw an apple at my head in the cage, I Beat his ass, his homies didn’t back him up cause he instigated, and watched arnold movies for days, then they lost me in the system, so I was there for days after I shoulda been, People having seizures pissing and shitting left and right, Twin Towers L.A. Suck,
I learned if im gonna drink, party, or Fight, Do it within walking distance of a couch I can crash on.
A couple months ago I got held up for having smoking weed (this was in Thailand btw) funny thing is, they didn’t even want money, they settled for 2 bottles of whisky. How screwed up is that?