[quote]batman730 wrote:
As a kid I didn’t know the difference between “guerrilla” and “gorilla”. I didn’t even know that guerrilla was a word.
When I would hear about “gorilla attacks” on the news I’d be really surprised that people weren’t way more worked up about giant apes attacking towns and trains and soldiers and whatnot. This seemed like a really serious problem to me.[/quote]
Oh shit, I’m 47 and you just learnt me
I can certainly contribute here.
When I was a kid I’d always see a bunch of used tampons in the bathroom trash.
Years later as a young man laying in bed with a girlfriend, I said to the girl “so how many tampons do you put in?” Without missing a beat, she said “Eleven”. I’m all “WHAT! Are you serious? Eleven?” In hysterics she manages to explain to me only one goes in.
[quote]bcingu wrote:
I conflated Pennsylvania and Transylvania, and was terrified when I visited the former. I remember there were a lot of daddy longlegs where I was staying, and I thought they were vampires who preferred not to be bats. Not a fun trip.[/quote]
Many moons ago, I was driving from MIT (Cambridge/Boston) to Columbus, MS to see a girl (who would be my wife). I had to do it in a more-or-less a long weekend, which is hard given that I could not drive on the Sabbath (Friday night to Saturday sundown). Anyway, I ended up driving at night and ended up on a lonesome highway in the middle of PA surrounded by some sort of corn field.
And then nature called. I was about to piss my pants, so I stopped.
Full moon. Chilly rain.
Oh, and I watched “Children of the Corn” a couple days before.
I look up and see one of those Amish barns covered in hex symbols. The wind is blowing and the corn starts to russel and part.
Running back to the car, piss going everywhere, I get the hell out of PA.
PA is Transylvania. Evil.
[quote]MattyG35 wrote:
What about cruise control on a car?
Anyone else translate that to ‘autopilot’?[/quote]
Believe it or not there were a lot of lawsuits about this in the 1960s.
Until a few weeks ago, my roommate was unaware that one could use a microwave to heat up soup.
FTR, she is 22 years of age, double majoring in chemistry and psychology with a 3.8 GPA.
I told her she’s lucky she’s not ugly.
I always got a surprise look from Aunt Betty when I would refuse her offer of a snails during breakfast (apparently, some Okies like to call cinnamon rolls “snails”)
found out much later that she was talking about cinnamon rolls - and was pissed.
When I was very very young (4-6) and there was a police/ambulance siren in the background, my older brother would turn to me and exclaim “They are FINALLY coming to get you!” That would put the fear of bejesus into me and I’d frantically try and think of what it was that I did wrong so I could quickly make up an excuse for it. I fell for it at least 4 or 5 times that I remember.
Well there have been a couple of things I missunderstood as a child.
When I was perhaps something like 5 years old I saw Amadeus( the mozart movie ) with my father and I was baffled because I found it weird that they had film cameras in the 1700`s.
I thought my dads name was dad( pappa in norwegian ) untill I was 3-4 years old and dad explained that he had another name.
I remember I argued with a friend of mine when I was six about how old people could get. I argued that people could get as old as 600 years old, wich my friend didnt believe. My argument was that my mom who works at a retirement home had patients that where 600 years old, what was the reality was that mom had said 106 years old, not 600 years old.
I have been told that when I was perhaps 2 or 3 years old, I was very found of kinder eggs and the figurins that they contained. Those figurins consisted of small parts( head, torso, legs etc ) and I had to put them togheter and I could also take them apart( remember this bit ). Well one day when me and my dad was in the store I asked for ice cream, but my dad told me no. I probably cried and asked again a couple of times, but my dad kept telling me no. Then after what I have been told we saw a guy standing in front of us eating a icecream, envious as I probably where, supposedly screamed to my father: " take hes head off dad, take hes head off dad! " ( as mentioned I dont remember this myself, but have been told it many times ).
When I was about 4 or 5 I used to love watching Godzilla movies. At the time, my dad used to take me to this park where the towns huge water tanks were located. There was a sign in front of the tanks just like the one posted here except the litter bug was more monstrous and mean looking. I thought it was a warning sign that these monsters were being held captive in the giant water tanks(obviously I couldn’t read). I was scared shitless the monsters from Godzilla were in there.
When I would watch the channel that tells you what’s gonna be on TV I kept seeing “to be announced” and I thought it was actually a show called to be announced, LOL.
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
When I would watch the channel that tells you what’s gonna be on TV I kept seeing “to be announced” and I thought it was actually a show called to be announced, LOL. [/quote]
I posted pretty much the same thing earlier…but it was in the TV listings in the paper and TBA is what it said. I saw it on different channels at different times and wondered what this popular show was.
I sometimes have fun with my kindergarten class.
I once told them that all people are born girls…live a full life to age 100, then turn into little boys all of a sudden and grow then untill age 100 again…so the oldest people on earth would be 100 year-old men.
I told a few of the boys to go along with me and fool the girls, by telling stories about how they were old women only a few years ago.
it worries me that Nards forms the youth if the future…
[quote]florelius wrote:
4. I have been told that when I was perhaps 2 or 3 years old, I was very found of kinder eggs and the figurins that they contained. Those figurins consisted of small parts( head, torso, legs etc ) and I had to put them togheter and I could also take them apart( remember this bit ). Well one day when me and my dad was in the store I asked for ice cream, but my dad told me no. I probably cried and asked again a couple of times, but my dad kept telling me no. Then after what I have been told we saw a guy standing in front of us eating a icecream, envious as I probably where, supposedly screamed to my father: " take hes head off dad, take hes head off dad! " ( as mentioned I dont remember this myself, but have been told it many times ).
[/quote]
LOL!
Can’t think of one off the top of my head for myself. I remember my sister thought Apollo 13 was the sequal to Forrest Gump.
[quote]Nards wrote:
[quote]Spock81 wrote:
When I would watch the channel that tells you what’s gonna be on TV I kept seeing “to be announced” and I thought it was actually a show called to be announced, LOL. [/quote]
I posted pretty much the same thing earlier…but it was in the TV listings in the paper and TBA is what it said. I saw it on different channels at different times and wondered what this popular show was.[/quote]
YEAH WELL…
YEAH WELL ONE time I was watching the channel that tells you what’s gonna be on t.v. and it said “news net”, but I’m retarded and suck at reading and thought it said “Ned’s newt” ← one of the most awesomest cartoons ever…
BOy was I disappointed.
There, original tv listings story.
I used to think Mecca Bingo was covertly operating as a brothel.
I used to think the idea of ‘hard’ & ‘soft’ water was some kind of marketing scam.
I used to think people who claimed to have had ‘lucid dreams’ were just showing off…Like, YAAAAR, I’m zoh I’m controll of my subconscious mind, I’m like the zeh Steven Spielberg of the zeh dream verld!!!
Initially, I was rather bamboozled by people in shops (always in ASDA) asking me if I wanted ‘cash-back’…I thought ‘cash back’ was some kind of compensation scheme for stuff that could have bought elsewhere cheaper. Why they didn’t just call it ‘cash out’, I have no idea
OH & sayings & song lyrics!
I used to think the Three Lions lyric ‘Jules Rimet still gleaming’ was actually ‘children they still dreaming’. I’d never heard of JR before
I also used to think the saying: ‘It’s a dog eat dog eat world’ was actually: ‘It’s a doggie dog world’…no idea why!!!
[quote]GorillaMon wrote:
OH & sayings & song lyrics!
I used to think the Three Lions lyric ‘Jules Rimet still gleaming’ was actually ‘children they still dreaming’. I’d never heard of JR before
I also used to think the saying: ‘It’s a dog eat dog eat world’ was actually: ‘It’s a doggie dog world’…no idea why!!!
[/quote]
I used to think one of the the lyrics was “Three lines in the dirt” instead of “Three lions on a shirt”
Quite bad to be honest seeing as it was an England football song and I didn’t put two and two together untill everyone was laughing at me…
[quote]GorillaMon wrote:
I used to think Mecca Bingo was covertly operating as a brothel.
I used to think the idea of ‘hard’ & ‘soft’ water was some kind of marketing scam.
I used to think people who claimed to have had ‘lucid dreams’ were just showing off…Like, YAAAAR, I’m zoh I’m controll of my subconscious mind, I’m like the zeh Steven Spielberg of the zeh dream verld!!!
Initially, I was rather bamboozled by people in shops (always in ASDA) asking me if I wanted ‘cash-back’…I thought ‘cash back’ was some kind of compensation scheme for stuff that could have bought elsewhere cheaper. Why they didn’t just call it ‘cash out’, I have no idea
[/quote]
I worked on the checkouts at ASDA a few years ago and I had to ask if people wanted cashback more times than I care to remember.
If I could have a pound for all the times people said “I aint got no cash to get back insert giggle here” Or “What, is ASDA paying for my shopping today?” I wouldn’t need to work for at least a month.
Instead of “Black Hole Sun” I thought the song went “Like the Sun”