The Return of Even More Movies You've Watched This Week III

Watched The Pope’s Exorcist and I think I’ve finally pinpointed the reason why I both think Russell Crowe is a really good actor and why his performances just leave me underwhelmed.

He’s supposed to be playing a priest. But, see, he’s not playing a priest. He’s playing another actor who’s nothing like him who’s playing the priest, which is why he’s a really good actor. I totally believe this actor he’s playing isn’t Russell Crowe. But the actor he’s playing sucks at playing a priest.

Get it? LOL. I’m not really getting it myself but I’ve never gotten Russell Crowe either.

As for the movie, look, unless you’re willing to go bonkers like how the Koreans do their exorcism movies, keep it to psychological stuff. Yes, I did see the nod to The Priests at the beginning where the demon is goaded into posessing a pig. They should have just done a remake of that film.

So, yeah, people are tossed around the room. Possessed chick contorts her body into positions in which all her joints should be broken. But eveyone knows nothing physical will last. Linda Blair eats glass and royally messes up her crotch but once Paah ZOOoo zu leaves her body everythinng’s fine. So what’s the point? There’s no actual tension unless you’re willing to follow through with actual consequences instead of the Roadrunner shit that just gets funnier the more you toss your characters around.

6/10

10/10 if they dropped a grand piano on Russell Crowe.

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Saw Renfieldtonight. Story centers around Renfield breaking out of servitude to Dracula in modern day New Orleans.

Really likes this campy horror comedy movie. Nicholas Cage plays Dracula and does a pretty good job.

Right kind of entertaining and not serious film.

Only downfall is they got “Awkwafina” (the chick from Shang-Chi) playing the support role and she just isn’t that great.

9/10

Watched Ted Lasso. Its a silly movie as long as it goes about football, but the kindness in the show gives me lots of good time and hope.

The Mandalorian got a good closure, but the season felt wasted.

Tried getting into The Wire and The Sopranos, but unfortunately both do not catch me.

Watch Shrinking. Same writers. Amazing show.

Not a movie, but the Netflix show BEEF was pretty darn entertaining.

I really want to see renfield

But the version of renfield that has been released in Aussie cinemas has been cut to secure an MA15+ rating as opposed to an R.

Australian rating system is different to, and typically less strict than America’s ultra secretive MPAA.

However an R rating is less financially lucrative. We have G (g, pg equiv in US), PG (pg, pg13 equivalent in USA by todays standards), M (pg-13, R in terms of what is allowed), MA-15+ (pg-13, R, occasionally nc-17) and R18+ (R, NC-17)

From looking at renfield I was shocked the Australian Classification Board slapped an R onto it. The tone seems campy, doesn’t look like it has anything particuarly heinous.

Is it particuarly gory? Australia is stricter with violence and gore than America, hence PG-13 films are sometimes MA15+ here

But far more lenient about sexual content (unless homosexual sex scenes are present), coarse language, drug use and tone.

The rule where PG-13 only allows one use of the word fuck… and if the word is used in a sexual context i.e “fuck me” it’s an automatic R is absurd. It’s also insane how one female nipple also =/= R

This wasn’t the case in the 80’s or 90’s re the nudity.

It bothers me way more than it should because America seemingly sets the precedent for blockbuster releases. This has eventuated with many big name theatrical releases getting butchered, cut to pieced or outright reshot or cancelled to acquire a PG-13 rating

Movies like Stay Alive, skinwalkers, cursed, venom etc come to mind when I think “films that were never meant to be pg-13 but were cut or even rewritten to make the quota”.

Stay alive didn’t even make any sense because pivotal plot points were cut out.

I’m thinking I wait untin renfield is on streaming platforms. Is it really as gory as Australia is making it out to be?

It’s not like Saw gory but there is a large number of flying limbs and pulverized folks. It’s way more campy than anything though and I hardly thought it deserved an R rating here.

Puritanical prudishness still rules in American social norms unfortunately. I can’t cuss around my in-laws for fear of seriously offending them (and they are legitimately the nicest people I know so I am respectful).

Was casually checking out a couple of Creepshow TV episodes, got bored and decided to just watch the Season 3 finale and nearly laughed myself into a coma.

I won’t go into any details since this is the kind of thing where you have to go into it completely not knowing what the story is about. All I’ll say is that it’s based on S.E Asian folklore and a nod to a very old, silly HK horror/comedy called The Haunted Tower by Jeff Lau that no one has heard of, which was actually one of the first movies I ever watched in the cinema and made me start loving movies in the first place.

8/10 for the Season 3 finale Part 1. Not impressed by other episodes at all. Can’t even be bothered to watch all of them even if there’s another gem like this one. If anyone decides to watch the whole series, do let me know if there’s another one lol.

It’s actually quite odd considering American INDIVIDUALS for the most part no longer align with or adhere to such puritanical ideals. Books like gender queer that have been sensationalised (I seriously doubt 99.9% of school libraries stock that trash) would be NC-17 if released on film.

That and, MPAA has gotten stricter with time. In 1984 when PG-13 was formulated, the rating was meant to create a gap between PG and R. Parents were furious over PG rated films having tits, sex, gore, drugs etc.

Now PG-13 has more/less become what PG was back in the 70’s and 80’s, except PG rated films WERE allowed to show tits. There are a number of old PG (or GP) rated horror films from the 60’s and 70’s that were re-rated R due to nudity or sexual content. ‘The oblong box’ and ‘scream and scream again’ both come to mind.

Although MPAA has loosened up a little bit on violence. For a while in the 2000’s and 2010’s, PG-13 wasn’t allowed to really show gore… PG-13 was allowed to have gore, nudity, sex etc in 80s and 90s. Only recently has PG-13 been allowed to showcase graphic violence again.

What is odd… Is the prevalence of LGBTQIA± whatever content in films means for children (lightyear comes to mind). You’d think an organisation with such puritanical standards would wish to restrict or censor this given they are VERY harsh when it comes to on screen same sex sexual activity.

The MPAA has a history of slapping films that aren’t particuarly graphic with NC-17 labels over homosexual content. The movie BENT from 1997 comes to mind. It’s a disturbing movie, but is it deserved of a rating so restrictive that it actually can’t be released in cinemas? No…

It appears as if the implication is ok… encouraged even… Anything beyond implication on screen entails wandering off into restricted territory. That’s fair enough, the same can be said for sexual content in pg-13 films as of 2023. Implied sexual intercourse and / or VERY tame sex scenes = ok. Beyond the implication i.e use of the word “fuck” with sexual connotations, a sex scene with thrusting or nudity visible etc… Automatic R.

Like if lightyear had a gay make out scene it obviously would have gotten a PG-13 minimum (potentially R). The film has a brief, innocuous same sex kiss and implied homosexual relationship dynamics were present therefore a PG rating was given.

This actually did irritate me as it was unnecessary. It’s obviously out of place… I want to be entertained… I don’t want political talking points in a prequel to toy story. I actually think audiences are generally with me here. It’s obviously not enough for me to avoid watching the film, but it’s enough for me to groan and roll my eyes.

It just doesn’t come across as genuine, there’s been this HUGE push for “dIvErSiTy” and “iNcLuSiViTy” over the past few years, now even the Oscars are going to have diversity quotas starting from 2024… because the Oscars have been doing so well recently as is with this current status quo. “How can we further alienate audiences?”

The level of disconnect between audiences, critics and actors present within these films has never been higher. It’s almost as if Hollywood has decided to subsist in another dimension; an alternate reality where identity politics and preachy political agendas fuelled by questionable ideologies set the stage for enjoyable entertainment.

If a TV series has been released in 2023 by Netflix, amazon etc. Or if a new blockbuster, Oscar bait style film has been released there’s a decent chance I’ll actually struggle to watch it. Diversity and inclusivity is fine so long as it isn’t forced.

I watched that 90’s show because I LOVED that 70’s show… But it becomes that an agenda is omnipresent obvious when diversity quotas and story arks about coming out becoming pivotal plot points relative to the original show which had hardly any of this. I look at the original cast of that 70’s show and think “I also had some fun hanging out with my friends in HS!”

It was relatable, funny, and entertaining. That 90’s show… I think “This friend group existing? Fat chance… Especially considering this is rural Wisconsin in the mid 90’s!”

And it’s just not funny anymore. Original show had jokes about Fez being foreign (can’t do that anymore), questionable behaviour (Fez being a sexual predator etc). Now the main girl sexually assaults a man in one episode, and it is seen as acceptable because girl power! She wants her first kiss… She will get it! Even if it means running after a guy who is uncomfortable, running away and pinning him down so you can force that kiss because grrrl power!

At least in that 70’s show this behaviour was looked down upon to a degree.

I know I’ve gone off topic, but America is also setting the precedent for these stupid sociocultural trends. I’m suprised as to how much radically progressive content comes from a country that simultaneously harbours so many puritanical ideals (MPAA, sociocultural formalities i.e can’t cuss etc).

America isn’t that conservative anymore, however the MPAA is a highly secretive organisation. If you watch the documentary “this film is not yet rated” you’ll see the organisation is heavily influenced by judeochristian values

The type of individual who winds up working for the MPAA is FAR more likely to resemble the Evangelical subtype as opposed to the average family man/woman

The organisation is SO secretive, if a member’s identity is leaked to the public it usually results in resignation. America is the only country I know of that classifies films and television independently of government input

I can’t help but think they wrote this Dracula specifically for Nick. I bet they had a good laugh either.
This was Nick Cage being Nick Cage, and it was awesome as always…

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Thank god money talks -more action!!!; don’t tell me to be woke, wake me up!!!

(apologies, but I have to say it -anheuser needs to hire this ad agency STAT LOL)

Top Gun 2

Blew my mind. This is as close to cinematic perfection as it gets.

Disclaimer: I’ve never watched more than 30mins of the original Top Gun so YMMV.

I’d give it 10/10 for the editing alone. Story is generic but who gives a fuck?

9/10

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I have so much respect for Tom Cruise after this movie; my take is he rejuvenated Val Kilmer.

Jennifer Connelly aging appropriately, still awesome after all these years.

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Haha it’s also the first movie I’ve watched where that kid from Whiplash didn’t irritate the fuck out of me. I actually liked him here like I liked that kid from the first few Transformers in Fury.

Tom Cruise is old school, man. Like the fellows who made John Wick. When dudes like him are gone, it will be like the HK film industry. There won’t be anymore “real” movies, only big budget trash recyled endlessly like a fucking algorithm like the state of China movies. I do still like Wu Jing’s stuff, though, when he’s making a movie with his own vision (Wolf Warrior 2). Donnie Yen is like the last line of defense lol. Enough clout to make stuff he wants to make. No one else. Not even Jackie Chan…

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Fun fact - I have been an engineer on the two major aircraft in this movie - F/A super hornets and E-2s (the radar plane that looks like a bus with a pancake on top)

Sorry - had to toot my own horn there. Top Gun actually does a pretty good job keeping to what the aircraft can actually do (unlike that stupid die hard movie where the matchbox car version of an F-35 chasing Willis around doing a bunch of impossible crap).

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First, I gotta say that’s pretty badass even though I know balls about planes. All I remember is Australian pilots are the most polite fuckers I’ve ever met in any defense branch and S.E ASIAN Chinese pilots are all mathematicians. Seriously.

Second, I applaud you for not referrring to that movie by name. I refuse to acknowledge it as a Die Hard movie lol. Yes, it’s an entertaining action flick. But it’s not DIE HARD. Fuck lololool I’m gonna stop myself from ranting about it. It’s what I was thinking of when I thought of old school fuckers like John McTiernan at the helm. Die Hard 1 and 3. Predator… Heightened realism. Yes, shit does not explode like that… cars do not blow up when you FIRE AT GAS TANKS… Arnie’s not surviving a fight with any lifeform that discovered intergalactic travel before the pyramids were built… but they were MOVIES. Real fucking movies… ok gotta stop…

Been watching a lot of soccer shows lately. The ones for Man City, Tothenham and Arsenal and the one for Wrexam + Ted Lasso.

All of them are pretty great and easilly rated at 8/10 if you are a soccer fan. Would recommend Ted Lasso and the Wrexam story even to non soccer fans.

I watched a movie called Neferious but I can’t speel it.

It was ok. BUT the lead actor… Throughout the movie all I was thinking was why has this guy not won an award from every fucking movie institution or academy or whatever the fuck for his performance because he was magnificent despite the silly scenerio.

So, I checked out other movies he starred in and found a fucking gem called:

@twojarslave @T3hPwnisher This is for you and BJJ fellows. I’m pretty damn sure you guys will love it.

To my own surprise, I am 80% sure there was a very tiny nod to a HK movie called Throw Down, which is one of my top 5 favorite movies of all time but it’s nothing like it because Throw Down is some postmodernist deconstruction stuff while this movie is a character drama with real heart and soul.

I guarantee that in the climax at least one BJJ dude or someone who knows a little bit about it is going to yell, “YES!!! TIANGLE!!! TRIANGLE!!!”.

It’s not perfect nor a classic but it’s a great emotional ride.

8/10

The dude is apparently a black belt. I have no idea what the 4th dan category. And he’s a fucking awesome actor.

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Holy shit. Saw the Christmas episode of season 2 of The Bear. That was my childhood to a T.

Watched “Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny” It reminds me the old childhood days when we enjoyed to watch this.