Found a better one: Guy in pharma asking about drug testing
With enough caffeine, time slows down.
I saw it 
I should start a thread: Why do my clothes feel tight after a massive protein feeding 
then describe how I ate an entire duck for good measure. It couldn’t have been the food volume …
Nah. It has to be a very specific substance in the duck like tryptophan or lysine that might have interacted with your phenotype or archetype or (insert sciency word here). 
I know because potatoes do the same thing to me when I eat 3.212 lbs. of them.
Yeah I’m pretty certain this is my problem. Doesn’t help that T-Nation is like 80% of my time wasting
Strength athletes: Our sport needs to grow! We need to support it so it can get legitimized and expand! If you’re not in support of growing the sport, you’re not in support of the sport. Standardization and drug testing are key!
Also strength athletes: What?! I have to pay to stream one of the biggest events in my niche sport? This is bullcrap: I ain’t doing it!
Are you suggesting that support with real things like time and money are more effective than Instagram posts?
I imagine the venn diagram representing people who demand the sport grow without spending money and people who demand everyone be drug tested in the sport but refuse to pay increased meet fees is, in fact, just 1 circle.
So today I had the simulation of my first calculus exam in university, which is gonna be next Monday.
It’s 1.20h to get to there city where my university is by car.
I get there and I start feeling my stomach weird. I have nausea and a little bit of a gut ache. Fast forward two hours, some friends and I are in the university canteen to get lunch before the simulation. I get up, excuse myself to the bathroom, get there, and proceed to throw up.
I start getting tremors, full body pain, lots of nausea afterwards. We head out of the canteen to a pharmacy and get some meds for the nausea. On the positive side, I managed to survive the test and to get back home.
The negative is that I’m still feeling sick and just threw up again after 7-8 hours (although I really haven’t got anything inside my stomach). I also fasted the whole day because the sole thought of eating anything was painful, and I wasn’t able to train.
I really hope I can get back to my normal schedule asap. Tomorrow I plan on waking up at 6am like usual and take the usual train to classes. I just hope that I’ll wake up feeling better because the worst part about being sick for me is not being able to function like I usually do. And I also don’t really know how to get back to eating now, without overdoing it.
‘Please critique my program’
No.
Go and do it for a few months and fucking critique it yourself.
Jesus.
My personal favourite:
Hi CT/Jim/Paul, I know you make your living by releasing programs that you’ve extensively tested and have hands on experience with, but I don’t like those because insert excuse here, can you do more work for me for free please?
You got to love it when you see fault in their programming and you point the issue out. Then the person wanting it evaluated wants to debate why you are wrong.
I confess that I am proud of this metaphor.
My wife thinks I’m knowledgable in anatomy, just because I lift weights. She’s frequently getting injured from running and wants me to tell her what part of her is injured based on where she points.
HOWEVER, my wife has a tendency to ONLY ever injure parts of her body that are in the “no man’s land” of muscles. Somewhere dead in the middle between a group of 2 or 3, and no matter what, I can’t get that pain to be pinpointed one way or the other.
I explained to her that, if her body was a map of the middle east, she’s pointing at the Gaza strip and asking me “Does this belong to Israel or Palestine?”
Well, if you were Israeli or Palestinian, the answer would be very clear 
I’m a Methodist.
In that case, you wife will forever be in the dark…
You could just start making stuff up.
“Oh, yeah, that’s the serendipitous muscle. I’m not sure how you injured it - probably just unlucky.”