[quote]bdocksaints75 wrote:
When I was younger I used to wear 2-3 shirts to make myself look bigger.[/quote]
I used to do the same thing with underwear.
I dont go near women who’ve been with black guys or would like them in a sexual way.
Also DB, that hyuuuge pile of dog shit has karma written all over it. Enjoy.
[quote]thethirdruffian wrote:
My biological father also knocked up a white lady who lived in town (his actual wife, at least for a while before he went off to prison or whatever the fuck happened to him).
My half-brother (younger by all of 10 days) and I went to seperate schools, as that mom moved away.
I was extremely jealous of my half-bother, for reasons unknown.
In fact, even though I really didn’t know him, I hated my half-brother with a complete passion, and pretty much the first thing I did after getting a car was drive to their house in Alto (another little NM town) and beat the shit out of him, just out of the blue. Right there in front of the house.
That was a YEARS ago and we’ve never talked. I regretted doing this from the momement I got back in my car.[/quote]
Freud would just have a field day with you.
[quote]bond james bond wrote:
My friends and I used to collect toads and play toad tennis. That was after we ran out of firecrackers. [/quote]
ROFL
In grade 7, my friends and I used to egg things. Our Friday and/or Saturday nights would be spent hurling extra-large Grade A eggs at cars, houses, and businesses. It was a magical time and the source of many fond memories.
Except for this one night.
The playground of our public school was separated from a major road by a chainlink fence. There was some work being done on the road, with traffic cones and barriers set up all over the place. Being crafty little fucks, we arranged these cones to form a bottleneck, funneling vehicles down a narrow lane directly in front of the fence, at which time we’d hop up and egg the ever loving shit out of whatever happened to drive by.
Under the cover of darkness, we spent a good hour at this, and used up at least 10 dozen eggs. The highlight was when we carpet-bombed a stretch limo - it was a united effort with about 2 dozen eggs used, each one a direct hit. When we were nearing the end of our supply, we pelted an open Jeep YJ with about 6-7 eggs, a couple of which hit the driver.
About two minutes later, we noticed a dark figure approaching us from the other end of the playground, approx 20 meters away. “WHICH ONE OF YOU LITTLE FUCKS THREW THAT SHIT?!” it yelled. We scrambled. Being the slowest and fattest kid, the driver decided to pursue me. I huffed and puffed to a nearby, darkly lit sidestreet (big mistake!) and the muscular, mullet-clad 80’s throwback closed in on me.
He grabbed me by the shirt and informed me that I had “picked the wrong fucking guy”. He looked and spoke just like the guy in the parking lot in Terminator 2 (“Fuck you, you little dipshit!!”). I had never had an adrenaline dump like that and felt like shitting my pants. I thought he was going to kick the shit out of me.
Then things got weird.
“Come on, you’re fucking coming with me to the car wash!!” he said
“Sir, your jeep is way back there, and I don’t want to come to the car wash. Here, I’ll give you 10 bucks so you can get it washed” I replied.
“Fuck that!! YOU’RE COMING WITH ME TO THE CAR WASH!” he continued. He was really adamant about me physically coming to the car wash with him. There wasn’t a molesty-vibe to it at all - I honestly think he was just a complete meathead and had trouble making sense of the situation in his cro-magnon head.
“I will give you ten bucks, but I am not coming with you” I said.
“I don’t want your ten bucks…just remember…you picked the WRONG GUY. I’m going to the carwash” he said.
Then he walked away, and that was that.
My confession here is that I told my friends that I pushed him and told him to fuck off, when in reality I almost soiled my tighty-whiteys…
When C.J. Wilson came in relief in the 2011 World Series and started pitching like shit i threw the tv remote onto the floor breaking it apart. I snapped it back together to where you could barely see that it was cracked and it still worked. Also if you shook or dropped it you could hear a rattling sound from broken plastic parts inside.
When my gf came home she didnt notice a thing. A few days later she was using the remote and she dropped it. Immediatly I notified her that she just broke the remote and I pointed out the crack in it and the rattling parts on the inside. She could’nt understand how the thing broke like that by just dopping it on the ground. I explained that things aren’t made like they are used to and she need to be more careful.
About a year later I told her I broke the remote and was just waiting for her to drop it so I could blame it on her. I thought it was funny and figured it’s been long enough. Big mistake. She started crying saying she couldn’t beleive I lied to her for so long and that she couldn’t trust me anymore. Turned a good day into a bad week.
Mulleted idiot attached for reference. Guy looked very similar to him, except with more sunken eyes, a more prominent brow, considerably more confused-looking, and with at least a 6 chromosome deficit/surplus…
Okay DB, you want a hefty admission from me. Here goes.
I’m the reason Ct. Rockula doesn’t post here in the forum any more.
Phew, that felt good to get off my chest. I’ve been harbouring some guilt about essentially driving him away and depriving the T-forum community from his trollish humour. All good things have to come to an end sometime, right?
[quote]Gettnitdone wrote:
Okay DB, you want a hefty admission from me. Here goes.
I’m the reason Ct. Rockula doesn’t post here in the forum any more.
Phew, that felt good to get off my chest. I’ve been harbouring some guilt about essentially driving him away and depriving the T-forum community from his trollish humour. All good things have to come to an end sometime, right?[/quote]
Alright, I confess. Your posts mean nothing to me, especially this particularly flaccid admission of yours.
[quote]pushharder wrote:
[quote]DBCooper wrote:
[quote]bdocksaints75 wrote:
When I was younger I used to wear 2-3 shirts to make myself look bigger.[/quote]
I used to do the same thing with underwear.[/quote]
Did you vary the colors? Our whole world is a rainbow. Our underwear should reflect that.[/quote]
I had color-changing underwear. At the beginning of the day they started out white and by the end of the day they were yellowish-brown.
Actually, no, I did not change colors. I really only wore white boxer briefs and a couple pairs of, you guessed it, 49ers boxer shorts.
Now, I have multiple shades of boxer briefs, mostly Hanes or Calvin Klein. Navy blue, several shades of heather gray, white, maroon, olive green, black and a bunch of boxer shorts in various plaid patterns.
In the summertime I pretty much don’t wear any underwear.
My uvula doesn’t hang down in the middle of my throat. It’s on the side.
In all seriousness, I’m pretty sure I suffer from narcissistic personality disorder. Well, I’m not sure I’m suffering from it, per se, but I’m almost positive I have it.
-
I cry everytime I watch “Its a wonderful life”
-
I’m a closet misanthropist, I smile, say thank you, please, everything society expects of me but deep down I really hate everyone. Been this way for about a year or more.
-
I know alot more about Star wars than I think I should.
I might think of more later
[quote]PimpBot5000 wrote:
In grade 7, my friends and I used to egg things. Our Friday and/or Saturday nights would be spent hurling extra-large Grade A eggs at cars, houses, and businesses. It was a magical time and the source of many fond memories.
Except for this one night.
The playground of our public school was separated from a major road by a chainlink fence. There was some work being done on the road, with traffic cones and barriers set up all over the place. Being crafty little fucks, we arranged these cones to form a bottleneck, funneling vehicles down a narrow lane directly in front of the fence, at which time we’d hop up and egg the ever loving shit out of whatever happened to drive by.
Under the cover of darkness, we spent a good hour at this, and used up at least 10 dozen eggs. The highlight was when we carpet-bombed a stretch limo - it was a united effort with about 2 dozen eggs used, each one a direct hit. When we were nearing the end of our supply, we pelted an open Jeep YJ with about 6-7 eggs, a couple of which hit the driver.
About two minutes later, we noticed a dark figure approaching us from the other end of the playground, approx 20 meters away. “WHICH ONE OF YOU LITTLE FUCKS THREW THAT SHIT?!” it yelled. We scrambled. Being the slowest and fattest kid, the driver decided to pursue me. I huffed and puffed to a nearby, darkly lit sidestreet (big mistake!) and the muscular, mullet-clad 80’s throwback closed in on me.
He grabbed me by the shirt and informed me that I had “picked the wrong fucking guy”. He looked and spoke just like the guy in the parking lot in Terminator 2 (“Fuck you, you little dipshit!!”). I had never had an adrenaline dump like that and felt like shitting my pants. I thought he was going to kick the shit out of me.
Then things got weird.
“Come on, you’re fucking coming with me to the car wash!!” he said
“Sir, your jeep is way back there, and I don’t want to come to the car wash. Here, I’ll give you 10 bucks so you can get it washed” I replied.
“Fuck that!! YOU’RE COMING WITH ME TO THE CAR WASH!” he continued. He was really adamant about me physically coming to the car wash with him. There wasn’t a molesty-vibe to it at all - I honestly think he was just a complete meathead and had trouble making sense of the situation in his cro-magnon head.
“I will give you ten bucks, but I am not coming with you” I said.
“I don’t want your ten bucks…just remember…you picked the WRONG GUY. I’m going to the carwash” he said.
Then he walked away, and that was that.
My confession here is that I told my friends that I pushed him and told him to fuck off, when in reality I almost soiled my tighty-whiteys…
[/quote]
We did something similar to this one devils night when I was about 13. There was a steep hill with train tracks on the top of it and a roadway with a traffic light at the bottom. We were firing up lines of stopped cars with a couple dozen eggs per red light.
Then we ran out of eggs. But the railroad tracks are covered with huge chunky rocks. So we used them instead. The first red light sounded like a horrendous clatter of broken glass, denting steel, and people screaming. We all kind of knew that we went way over the top on that one and started heading up the tracks. Thats when we hear footsteps from behind us and the guy yells “You Motherfuckers!” and started shooting at us.
No one was hit, and we all ran for at least a good half mile, too afraid to even look over our shoulders. Once we got far enough away and got a good vantage point way up on a hill we could see squad car lights racing all over the place and some deer spotter lights sweeping areas of the hill where we were.
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]DBCooper wrote:
In all seriousness, I’m pretty sure I suffer from narcissistic personality disorder. Well, I’m not sure I’m suffering from it, per se, but I’m almost positive I have it.[/quote]
Why do you believe that?[/quote]
I never admit when i’m wrong, I have a massively inflated sense of self, I fly off the handle at even the slightest criticism, I’m extremely vain, I fantasize constantly about unrealistic levels of success (the Oscars really did a number on me), I have trouble maintaining any sort of relationship with women for more than a couple months for the most part, I am easily turned off by the slightest shit from women, I find myself attracted to women almost solely on the basis of whether or not I would want to be seen in public with them, and while I can be extremely sensitive of people’s feelings at times I find that this occurs at a rate inverse to how it should actually be.
What I mean by that is that I am almost completely devoid of sympathy toward the people closest to me but I find myself feeling anywhere from deeply morose to overly ecstatic about the misfortunes or good fortune of people I don’t even know. I felt more elated after the Olympics than I did after the birth of my nieces and nephew, for instance. There were two police officers shot and killed in the town where my parents live and when they called to tell me about it today I was fucking pissed that they called during Jeopardy! and completely tuned them out.
I also find myself hating all of the things in other people that I am most guilty of myself. I hate people who are lazy and blame others for their problems, yet I do the same thing all the time. I hate when people can’t admit when they’re wrong and are complete assholes about letting everyone know when they are right and everyone else is wrong, except that I am extremely guilty of this almost every day. I suppose that’s more of a counteractive personality disorder than a narcissistic disorder, but I’m sure the two go hand in hand for the most part.
I’m convinced I have the next Great American Novel sitting somewhere in my head (several of them, actually) yet my greatest accomplishment as a writer is being the most popular writer for a now defunct local magazine that no one really read. I’m convinced that my taste in music, art, film and so forth is far superior to anyone else’s that I know. I think I have elegant taste in men’s wear, architecture, watches, women’s formal wear, hairstyles, shoes, jazz, cars and so forth, and I also think that part of the degeneration of American culture is tied to the fact that most people nowadays don’t appreciate the same things that I do.
I guess that just about sums things up for now. I could confess to more, but quite frankly, I don’t have it in me to really get a whole lot deeper here. Sometimes I think that people who have been familiar with my posts for a while now know me better than pretty much anyone in my actual life does.
i went to a milli vanilli concert and thought it was REAL
[quote]Chushin wrote:
[quote]DBCooper wrote:
In all seriousness, I’m pretty sure I suffer from narcissistic personality disorder. Well, I’m not sure I’m suffering from it, per se, but I’m almost positive I have it.[/quote]
Why do you believe that?[/quote]
DAMN YOU, CHUSH!
You HAD to ask him!
I’m just glad he’s not as wordy on G+!
Or present.
lol
When i was like 11 or 12? i went around taking orders and money for a school fundraiser. I kept all the cash, still feel like a dick about it to this day.