If you’re in a stable relationship and past that initial few months, how often (how many times a week basically) do you like to have sex? Just curious, as I am trying to guage what “normal” is in the context of a classic male/female disagreement (guy wants it more often than the girl does). As a guy, once a day is the minimum I want, whereas that seems to be over the sustainable maximum for the women of my acquaintence (“You want it again tonight even though we did it TWICE yesterday?”).
I have a pretty high sex drive and enjoy frequent episodes. If circumstances allowed for say, an AM and a PM, I would be a happy girl. However, wanting it and getting it are two very diffrent animals. My BF and I have diffrent work schedules, diffrent training schedules, he’s in a band and has rehearsals and gigs, I have classes, and so forth. Even though we live together, it ends up being ALOT less frequent…
Some classic words of wisdom from my dad: Men want sex, women need sex. Basically, women need the physical validation from men that they are attractive , and i dont mind a bit.
I do it when I feel like it, which is most of the time. If she’s not in the mood, then just go jack off. Most of the time, if you do something to make her feel sexy, i.e. give her a rub, kiss her neck from behind, etc., she’ll be in the mood.
Agree that if you attend to her emotional/psychological needs she will be more interested in fulfilling your physical ones. This means all of the time, not just when you are in the mood.
My ex never seduced my mind and quite frankly I wasn’t all that interested in seducing him because of it. Then once I hit my mid 30s he had the nerve to complain to a friend that I wanted it too often…that was the beginning of the end…LOL
Those kisses on the back of her neck, the shoulder rubs, the quick phone calls to tell her you are thinking of her…those gestures all go a long way.
If that doesn’t work grab her by her hair and plant a good kiss on her, throw her over your shoulders and carry her off.
Oh, and to answer your question…I wanted my last boyfriend all of the time!
I think I may be one of the few women on earth who has heard “Not tonight honey, I’m too tired”. Sex is great ;). And yes, I will agree I definitely feel much more sexy when I’m wanted!! My mom always said “Men want, and women want to be wanted.”
All that aside though…I could do with sex every day if in a stable committed relationship (or just a fun, lustful one). sigh Neither of which are around at the moment!! I really honestly do not get the women who don’t like sex. Maybe they’ve just never had good sex…but wow, I know plenty of girls who would rather do without it if it weren’t for the attention it nets them in the course of things.
Elfling
I’ve been dating the same girl since early May and initially we were goin’ at it like rabbits, like rabbits I tell ya!
Then I started MAG-10 and I found myself preferring the weight room, sleep and food over sex, so much so that I adjusted my workout times to mid-late evening so that I would only see her on the weekends.
Now I’m doing the Tribex thing post cycle and find myself feeling ravenously hungry for the weight room, sex, sex, sex, food, and food.
Naturaly, my girl is having trouble comprehending this almost immediate shift in libido and it’s causing some problems in the relationship. She’s satisfied with two or three times a week, but I definitely am not. I’d it like two or three times a day if I could, but lord knows that our schedules won’t allow that.
Now she’s feeling like a piece of meat, and I’m feeling like a piece of crap. I don’t think it’s fair to her that I’m either all go or no go…
Ah fuck it, now I’m just rambling… I’m going to call her and get this straightened out
That will fix any and all thoughts about lack of sex/too much sex… lolol
Hardest part is finding time for it. We both work at home and our kids are 0-4 years old (so home all day also), leaving us precious little time to ourselves.
Many a time we have begun a session only to be interrupted by wild kid noises in other rooms or thrashing on the door, or whining… Oh I cant wait till they go to school…
In my experience, men usually have a constant baseline of libido while women fluctuate between extremes. I only partially attribute this to hormonal fluctuations because I agree with the fact that many women give it up to get love/validation. Ever notice how when you’re in the doghouse with her, you pretty much know that you’re not getting any, but no matter what she does to you, you’ll usually still hit it. I finally realized that all I was to my ex was a penis and a future paycheck. This sounds bad, but I don’t even like the girl anymore and we still hook up occasionally. I’m not going to complain about being a piece of meat. It’s actually kind of nice. With all of her bullshit out of the equation, I have more time to myself and I still get laid. The less attention I pay her, the more she comes around. It’s a win/win situation, for now at least…
I think overly horny chicks on the internet are the female equivalent of the 6’5", 280lb. male with 4% bodyfat who runs a 4.1 forty and benches 900lbs. I’m skeptical.
My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and we still go at it like rabbits.
Why?
Cuz I’m good at it, that’s why! Hahaha!
However, I will share my secrets.
Go down on her or use your fingers and give her at least, oh, 5 orgasms before sex. I give mine around 10, but you might want to build up to that. The tongue seems to be incredibly fast-twitch and needs to be endurance-trained.
What I do is bring her to the edge, stop, to the edge, stop, to the edge, stop – about 8 or 9 times with your tongue or fingers or whatever then stimulate her to full-orgasm on the 10th or so near-orgasm.
I’ll tease her to the edge for a random number of times between 8 and 15, just to keep her off guard when the real orgasm comes.
THEN you have sex with her and last more than a few minutes. Give her a nightly thrill-ride like that and she’ll eventually start attacking you at random times of the day if only for the purpose of getting YOU off.
I love my life…
PS - Another possible reason for lower frequency is that she’s a little sore from the previous night’s romp in the sack. In that case, go to google.com and type in: “foreplay techniques”.
doogie - You poor thing I am not sure where K~ is yet but I asure you there are manny a “real” high labido matress soaking weight liften sister on this forum.
I think if the chemistry is there= once a day is not a lot to ask for my God even with kids.
WOW,
That statement that someone made pertaining to women needing sex for validation that they are attractive REALLY hit home for me! My ex and I were together for almost 2 years and in the months leading up to us breaking up, I’ll admit that we got in a “rut” and we were having sex 1-2 times per week (usually the weekends). She took the fact that we didn’t have sex on a daily basis as me not thinking she was attractive which in all honestly makes me feel horrible, cause that is NOT the case. I don’t know why my sex drive wasn’t that high at the time. I think there were alot of factors:
Training (does’t intense training lower sex drive in a man? I mean at the time, I was training like 90-120 minutes per day…which is just too long. I would be exhausted.)
Work (I work 40 minutes away from home, so after an 8 hour day, I have a 40 minute drive home and I would be tired during the week…LAME excuse I know!)
Harsh Winter (this past winter in central NY was HORRIBLE!! The bad weather just made the two of us depressed and irratible at times).
Irregardless, she took the fact that we only had sex on the weekends as me not thinking she was attractive and that just kills me!!! I feel like such an ass that I made her feel so sad and depressed. I really do. It breaks my heart.
We broke up in January, and now that she is gone, my god…my sex drive is crazy. In the months since we broke up, I have learned the advantages of shorter workouts and now that summer is here, I dont feel so depressed. Its amazing how being able to go outside and enjoy the sun can make someone FEEL better!
She has a new boyfriend now, and it makes me sick thinking of them being intimate together. I know it is pretty fruitless to think about them two together, but it is sooooooo hard not to. Shit, its been six months since I have had ANY romantic interaction with the opposite sex (not even holding hands) and she now lives with her new boyfriend in an apartment which is in the same town as me. So I get to enjoy the fact that they are sleeping in the same bed less than a half mile away from me (literally…they live less than a half mile away from me!).
Needless to say, I feel pretty shitty that I made her feel so sad. I often wondered if there was something wrong with me because my sex drive was so low. But the more I think of it, I really think it was because of my training in conjunction with the horrible winter. Is that possible? Or am I waaaaaaaay off base in assuming that?
The sex was great when we had, it just wasn’t on a regular basis and now I have to live with the fact that she is with someone else…UHG! I guess the one good thing that came out of this, is that I have learned from my mistakes. But I still feel like an asshole. The thought of her even thinking that I didn’t think she was attractive just saddens
My last relationship lasted just over 2 years, and at that point I was still very interested in sex pretty much all hours of the day, sometimes excluding the one immidiately post-coitus.
Generally my girlfriend didn’t have the same level of sex drive, but sometimes she did, and in those weeks/months I’d be a very very happy camper. My mission in life is to find a women with whom I’m more sexually compatible. A couple of times a day will generally keep me from feeling a deficit.