[quote]CainMarko wrote:
Granted, now they wish that you weren’t so fucking stupid.
I wish I had one of those hot Russians models as a girlfriend[/quote]
Granted, but ‘she’ isn’t as much female as you’d hoped.
I wish Dana White and M1 Global would thumbs up Fedor to fight in the UFC when they make the announcement Friday if he will or not.
Granted. Fedor wins and leaves a hot steamer in the octagon that becomes sentient and goes on to dominate the lightweight division.
I wish I could go to sleep right now.
[quote]AttackOfTheChris wrote:
Granted. Fedor wins and leaves a hot steamer in the octagon that becomes sentient and goes on to dominate the lightweight division.
I wish I could go to sleep right now.
[/quote]
Granted, however right as you fall asleep someone bricks on your face and leaves a nice hot steamer.
I wish I could turn invisible at will.
[quote]MetalGrasshopper wrote:
AttackOfTheChris wrote:
Granted. Fedor wins and leaves a hot steamer in the octagon that becomes sentient and goes on to dominate the lightweight division.
I wish I could go to sleep right now.
Granted, however right as you fall asleep someone bricks on your face and leaves a nice hot steamer.
I wish I could turn invisible at will.
[/quote]
Granted, but you get embarrassed once in front of a large group of people and “turn it on”, which causes you to become wanted by federal authorities who eventually hunt you down and probe your anus.
I wish I could experience death, without actually dying so I could win arguments about religion.
[quote]angry chicken wrote:
I wish I could experience death, without actually dying so I could win arguments about religion.[/quote]
Granted, however, you find out that God is a kind and loving God who loves all his creations. Except you.
I wish that the Crysis 2 trailer at E3 wasn’t 100% ambiguous. Dammit I love me some Crysis.
[quote]Xab wrote:
angry chicken wrote:
I wish I could experience death, without actually dying so I could win arguments about religion.
Granted, however, you find out that God is a kind and loving God who loves all his creations. Except you.
I wish that the Crysis 2 trailer at E3 wasn’t 100% ambiguous. Dammit I love me some Crysis. [/quote]
Granted. In fact I’ll do you one better - you have the actual game. However, the system requirements are so high that every time you even click the launch icon, your computer crashes and catches on fire.
I wish I were more motivated to do menial tasks that I don’t care about but in the long run matter a lot.
[quote]MetalGrasshopper wrote:
Granted. In fact I’ll do you one better - you have the actual game. However, the system requirements are so high that every time you even click the launch icon, your computer crashes and catches on fire.
I wish I were more motivated to do menial tasks that I don’t care about but in the long run matter a lot. [/quote]
Granted, however every time you sit down to do them, you crash and catch on fire.
I wish it would keep raining every day so that I can keep putting off mowing the lawn.
Granted, you don’t mow the lawn,weeds grow uncontrollably and eventually spread throughout your home. You acciddently get stung by a thistle and turned into a steamer.
I wish there were only four days in a week.
Granted. But each one is a monday so you never get a day off.
I wish that Hendrix’s wish of the power of love overcoming the love of power would come true
[quote]Jereth127 wrote:
Granted. But each one is a monday so you never get a day off.
I wish that Hendrix’s wish of the power of love overcoming the love of power would come true[/quote]
Granted, and we all never seek power or social status in any way whatsoever. This eventually collapses our capitalist economy and we become socialists. With no power hungry fucks to “run” the commune, and every one fucking all the time instead of working, we all starve to death and the human race becomes extinct.
I wish I had a way to really legally FUCK someone
Granted. It’s called marriage.
I wish i could walk through walls, if for no other reason than winning countless bets.
[quote]VonStinkle wrote:
I wish i could walk through walls, if for no other reason than winning countless bets.[/quote]
Granted, however you cannot control this power, so you fall through to the center of the world where you are burnt to death.
I wish Biotest would bring those 5lb tubs of Grow! back.
[quote]Xab wrote:
VonStinkle wrote:
I wish i could walk through walls, if for no other reason than winning countless bets.
Granted, however you cannot control this power, so you fall through to the center of the world where you are burnt to death.
I wish Biotest would bring those 5lb tubs of Grow! back.[/quote]
Granted, but TC left a 5lb steamer in the one they sent to you
I wish there were more hours in the day
[quote]angry chicken wrote:
Xab wrote:
VonStinkle wrote:
I wish i could walk through walls, if for no other reason than winning countless bets.
Granted, however you cannot control this power, so you fall through to the center of the world where you are burnt to death.
I wish Biotest would bring those 5lb tubs of Grow back.
Granted, but TC left a 5lb steamer in the one they sent to you
I wish there were more hours in the day[/quote]
Granted, but you are hit by a bus and are now a quadriplegic whose male caretaker has a violent addiction to viagra and anal rape.
I wish i lived on an island with gilbert godfried.
Granted. No need to ruin this wish, it will ruin itself.
I wish i lived on an island with baretta’s avatar. And my avatar. And a ship crashed into shore spilling its cargo of beer, k y, sex toys, and chicken wings.
Granted, looks at barretts avatar but eh… um…
wha’…?
[quote]VonStinkle wrote:
Granted. No need to ruin this wish, it will ruin itself.
I wish i lived on an island with baretta’s avatar. And my avatar. And a ship crashed into shore spilling its cargo of beer, k y, sex toys, and chicken wings.[/quote]
Granted, but it’s not you it’s me.
I wish I can solve a simple 2x2x2 rubik’s cube.
granted, the solution lies before you. When you solve it you unlock the door to the Hellraiser dimension and you meet a cenobite called Vibratorface that has a special treat for you.
I wish Julie Strain from about 15 years ago would take a nice shower and then use my face as a seat cushion before she gets dressed.
[quote]Tulkastaldo wrote:
granted, the solution lies before you. When you solve it you unlock the door to the Hellraiser dimension and you meet a cenobite called Vibratorface that has a special treat for you.
I wish Julie Strain from about 15 years ago would take a nice shower and then use my face as a seat cushion before she gets dressed.[/quote]
Granted. Unfortunately she also had some really greasy Mexican food for dinner that just didn’t agree with her and slides right through her system. She has a sudden and uncontrollable bout of diarrhea, leaving a nice hot pile of liquid steamer on your face.
I wish I could eat fire and shit trains…or vice versa
You can eat fire, which is awesome, however you shit amtrak trains which are only ridden by Amish people and middle aged autistic bachelors with their moms. When you try to expand rail service to more areas there are protests to keep the rail lines out of people’s neighborhoods.
You are pinned as the culprit since the trains issued from your anus and you are forced to consume the trains you shat out, which, of course, results in you shitting fire, which immolates your entire state resulting in the fall of democracy in America since everyone knows the nation goes the way of Ohio.
I wish I could show up at an aryan brotherhood rally and morph into a nordic frost giant so I could eat every other attendant and shit them out in an unmarked grave.