I wanted to say that this and other of your posts have impressed me. Especially since you seem to be in your early 30s.
Also, that I’m really sorry to read that about your wife, and truly hope that it all works out ok for you and your family.[/quote]
That’s kind of you to say. Nice to know someone’s reading the long winded stuff I leave on these boards. I am likewise impressed with many of your posts.
Also, thanks for your concern for my family as well. It’s appreciated.
Edit - STILL can’t shorten quotes properly lol.[/quote]
You need to close as many quotes as are open, or remove some quotes to match to the number of closed ones.
I am not saying that some women would not deserve it, but the correct approach to a woman being a little emotional/financial/attention vampire is usually not a swift hook to the liver.
[/quote]
What the hell does this have to do with aggression? This isn’t a conversation about aggression and I don’t recall talking to you. For the record I have no problems with appropriately place aggression, never have. [/quote]
Eh, Looks like I had some ‘inappropriately placed aggression’ last night. But that is kinda the route this thread was taking: Aggression, being nice, dealing with bullies etc. somehow I got out of your posts (still am getting it) that you were against aggression.
This is what is classified as an open forum neh? Where people derp around and chime in as they please.
[quote]csulli wrote:
Well this isn’t really related to bullying… but as far as being in the more “grown up” world, I honestly sort of have the “nice guy/beta male” personality, and I have a hard time being mean or confrontational. What’s cool though, is that there aren’t many guys out there who try to “take advantage” of a nice guy when he’s got a 50" chest and could throw them through a basketball hoop.
So I think the bigger you are, the more of a nice guy you can afford to be
Because what are those fucking pencil necks going to do about it?[/quote]
What if the asshole is a woman?[/quote]
Go “bus driver” on her?[/quote]
If it was that easy…
I am not saying that some women would not deserve it, but the correct approach to a woman being a little emotional/financial/attention vampire is usually not a swift hook to the liver.
[/quote]
FTR, I intended this in jest. Of course not everyone on these boards would take it that way so I wanted to clarify.
I would not offer “have you tried hitting her?” as relationship advice.
[quote]csulli wrote:
Well this isn’t really related to bullying… but as far as being in the more “grown up” world, I honestly sort of have the “nice guy/beta male” personality, and I have a hard time being mean or confrontational. What’s cool though, is that there aren’t many guys out there who try to “take advantage” of a nice guy when he’s got a 50" chest and could throw them through a basketball hoop.
So I think the bigger you are, the more of a nice guy you can afford to be
Because what are those fucking pencil necks going to do about it?[/quote]
What the hell does this have to do with aggression? This isn’t a conversation about aggression and I don’t recall talking to you. For the record I have no problems with appropriately place aggression, never have. [/quote]
Eh, Looks like I had some ‘inappropriately placed aggression’ last night. But that is kinda the route this thread was taking: Aggression, being nice, dealing with bullies etc. somehow I got out of your posts (still am getting it) that you were against aggression.
This is what is classified as an open forum neh? Where people derp around and chime in as they please. [/quote]
No, I had my share of fights. It just did not work. I was a tiny kid. I weighed 65 lbs. in 6th grade, 85 in 8th. I was 125 lbs when I graduated high school. Whooping ass wasn’t my forte, but it wasn’t due to lack of effort. It was lack of ability and size. I took karate thinking that would help, that’s when I learned karate is a bit of a sham. Size and strength still win the day, so do numbers of people. In some way fighting seemed to make it worse because I wasn’t good at it. Perhaps if I could have done some real bodily harm then maybe, but I couldn’t.
Then there’s group think, when others join in, you cannot whoop a crowd’s ass. Occasionally, I had success. One time a guy gave me a wet-willy thinking I was passive as you guys apparently thought I was, just by instinct I punched him in the face. Then he kept messing with my paper in science so I stabbed his hand with my pencil and left some graphite in it, after that he left me alone, but it did not stop others. And when pretty popular girls join in you’re pretty much fucked.
I wasn’t passive, I was ineffective.
What the hell does this have to do with aggression? This isn’t a conversation about aggression and I don’t recall talking to you. For the record I have no problems with appropriately place aggression, never have. [/quote]
Eh, Looks like I had some ‘inappropriately placed aggression’ last night. But that is kinda the route this thread was taking: Aggression, being nice, dealing with bullies etc. somehow I got out of your posts (still am getting it) that you were against aggression.
This is what is classified as an open forum neh? Where people derp around and chime in as they please. [/quote]
No, I had my share of fights. It just did not work. I was a tiny kid. I weighed 65 lbs. in 6th grade, 85 in 8th. I was 125 lbs when I graduated high school. Whooping ass wasn’t my forte, but it wasn’t due to lack of effort. It was lack of ability and size. I took karate thinking that would help, that’s when I learned karate is a bit of a sham. Size and strength still win the day, so do numbers of people. In some way fighting seemed to make it worse because I wasn’t good at it. Perhaps if I could have done some real bodily harm then maybe, but I couldn’t.
Then there’s group think, when others join in, you cannot whoop a crowd’s ass. Occasionally, I had success. One time a guy gave me a wet-willy thinking I was passive as you guys apparently thought I was, just by instinct I punched him in the face. Then he kept messing with my paper in science so I stabbed his hand with my pencil and left some graphite in it, after that he left me alone, but it did not stop others. And when pretty popular girls join in you’re pretty much fucked.
I wasn’t passive, I was ineffective.[/quote]
Looking back on that now, don’t you think that both those responses were a little extreme? I guess I could see kids continuing to tease entirely because of the over-the-top response.
If you were to go back and change a few things, what you would do differently? Would you have convinced yourself to bulk up to not get pushed around? Would you have resorted to different strategies to get your point across?
What the hell does this have to do with aggression? This isn’t a conversation about aggression and I don’t recall talking to you. For the record I have no problems with appropriately place aggression, never have. [/quote]
Eh, Looks like I had some ‘inappropriately placed aggression’ last night. But that is kinda the route this thread was taking: Aggression, being nice, dealing with bullies etc. somehow I got out of your posts (still am getting it) that you were against aggression.
This is what is classified as an open forum neh? Where people derp around and chime in as they please. [/quote]
No, I had my share of fights. It just did not work. I was a tiny kid. I weighed 65 lbs. in 6th grade, 85 in 8th. I was 125 lbs when I graduated high school. Whooping ass wasn’t my forte, but it wasn’t due to lack of effort. It was lack of ability and size. I took karate thinking that would help, that’s when I learned karate is a bit of a sham. Size and strength still win the day, so do numbers of people. In some way fighting seemed to make it worse because I wasn’t good at it. Perhaps if I could have done some real bodily harm then maybe, but I couldn’t.
Then there’s group think, when others join in, you cannot whoop a crowd’s ass. Occasionally, I had success. One time a guy gave me a wet-willy thinking I was passive as you guys apparently thought I was, just by instinct I punched him in the face. Then he kept messing with my paper in science so I stabbed his hand with my pencil and left some graphite in it, after that he left me alone, but it did not stop others. And when pretty popular girls join in you’re pretty much fucked.
I wasn’t passive, I was ineffective.[/quote]
This is kind of a good point. The whole “just stand up to a bully and he won’t bother you anymore” line plays out better in an after school special than it does in real life. Bullies are predators who employ asymmetrical rules of engagement. i.e. they will always have a size/numbers/meanness advantage. Since it’s not really practical to sneak up behind a guy on the schoolyard and shiv him in the neck for stealing your lunch money, it can be extremely difficult to overcome those odds. If you fight but are ineffective, I can absolutely see how that would make it worse, by adding to the sport you offer without providing any real deterrent. There really is no easy answer.
Oh brother, O. Don’t use big words you don’t understand. You seem to be confused in someway that my experience as a kid defines me now as an adult and am still stuck in the same spot. I am also not so dumb to recognize that you are baiting me with your “Bodyguard” style tactics and mocking my faith. Passive-aggressive? Why because I don’t want to play your silly game?
What shall I do, hunt down everybody that picked on me as a kid and shoot’em? That prove I am a man to you? How ridiculous. Apparently saying that your behavior that you expressed was insecure was spot the-the-fuck on since you you are exhibiting that very behavior here and on the subsequent pages.
Emasculated my ass. I did not delve into the specifics of the things of what happened or what I did about them, I simply discussed how those things made me feel. I didn’t lay down and take anything, I was simply out numbered. Don’t pretend to think you understand things of which you have no clue. You weren’t there and you don’t know.
And you are more insecure than I thought.
So people think I am “nice”, I can think of worse things to be. And clearly as much time as you spend in PWI, you know I am not always, nice. I don’t need to be when I am right.[/quote]
First of all, I do not use “The Bodyguards” “tactics” I have the same mindset.
In some areas, not so much in others.
[/quote]
He was a pure fucking idiot. He wasn’t tough, he was a sad pathetic little person who tried to get into fights with people in the internet. I hope for your sake, you are not like him.
Being nice has nothing to do with being a doormat. It simply means that I would rather be honest and kind to others than put up some silly wall to protect my insecurities. I don’t need to do that. I am comfortable with the person I am further I am an adult, I don’t go around with ILS (Imaginary Lat Syndrome) looking for someone to fuck with me. Now you go to jail for fights. And I certainly haven’t gotten to where I am in life by being a doormat. There is no way I could have. I am not going to get into specifics, but I have taken on people who could fire me from my job, co-workers who wanted to get me fired, got restraining orders on people trying to fuck with my family and sued a gym owner (and won) who tried to fuck me out of money just to name a few. Despite what you think, people who fuck with me or my family get dealt with harshly. I did manage to grow up, despite the things that things that happened to me in my youth.
In this thread I was relating how the things that happened to me as a kid affected me and made me feel. You somehow misinterpreted it as something I allowed or even invited to happen to me. My crime was my size.
Your impressions are incorrect and I damn sure don’t need your advise which is bad. I am also not stupid enough to believe you care about me. I am fine, I don’t need your help or advise. I am successful person.
This thread was about a girl who was bullied. Others were relaying their experiences and so was I. It has nothing to do with ‘letting it go’. Letting it go doesn’t mean I forgot all about it. And the truth is, you do get over it, but the scars remain forever.
Don’t pretend you know anything about religion save for what you’ve read on those silly atheist propaganda websites. If you are interested in losing yet another religious argument take it to PWI.
The bottom line here is you read what I wrote and extrapolated it and expanded it into shit it was not. I was not passive, I did not invite it, and like I explained to Andrew I had my share of fights. If you have one bully and you whoop his ass, the problem is solved. It’s almost never mono-i-mono. Bullying happens in groups. And when the group gets involved, it get’s far worse and thee is NOTHING you can do about it. Fortunately for you you will never know what that is like.
[quote]
[quote]
So people think I am “nice”, I can think of worse things to be. And clearly as much time as you spend in PWI, you know I am not always, nice. I don’t need to be when I am right. [/quote]
Fucking A!
This applies to ALL other areas in your life as well.[/quote]
I seriously don’t see anything in your life I should follow as an example, so keep your unwelcome advises to yourself. It takes a lot more courage to be a genuine person who cares about others, after experiencing the things experienced, then it does to put up a bunch of walls and act like a fake tough guy.
It takes more courage to decide to be a genuine, real person who cares about others, knowing that makes you vulnerable then it does to block out people, not let them get to close. That is cowardly.
If I act like you say I should act, or be like you think I should be, that would mean that I did not get over it, that would make me a coward.
Just like what happened in this thread. I relayed, honestly, how what I experienced affected me. I expressed some of the weakest moments of my life, knowing that it would open me up to crap like this. I did it anyway, because it might help somebody else understand. And if it helps somebody, then it was worth it despite having to deal with your completely false and misplaced judgments of me. You don’t have a right and you damn sure are in no position to judge me, then or now.
Like others here, got bullied some, did some of my own bullying for which I am not proud. One of the guys we bullied in HS is now a fishing buddy of mine. Met him on the river after not seeing him for twenty five years. Goes by the name of Big Dave now, 6’8"-375 and very forgiving thank God lol.
Just came across this. Seemed relevant. I guess I wish someone would have pointed me into the gym when I was a kid. Being athletic affords you a lot of respect but if kids dont have a knack for sports or have a chance to get involved then theres little else that could be simpler than weight lifting. Karate is a lie. to be proficient it requires all the same physicalities as any other sport (agility, strength, hand eye coord).
I was mad for a lot of elementary and highschool. I still am mad. The difference is that at the time I didnt know how to deal with it. I burned my arms, kept a blackbook journal of offenders, I cut my knees (easy to hide, I didnt want attention. I wanted to disappear). I had no outlet for my frustration. Instead of doing something awesome like teaching me grappling and chess my dad prescribed to the old “Men dont cry, and if you get in trouble at school you get it ten fold at home” doctrine. I changed highschools much like the Late Ms. Todd. When the bullying started there I stood up for myself.
I ignored the name calling at first. Then the name started coming with elbow jabs in the hallway. Nothing too hard. A couple weeks of this and in the middle of class someone made a jest at me. I stood up ready to kill him. Literally seeing red. I was afraid I might cry I was so angry. I told him “One more time and I’ll punch your face in”. I think the teacher talked to the guy after class. Either way I never heard the name again.
A group of kids sitting in around a school entrance at lunch were making fun of all the uncool people as they walked by. Just cat calls. Nothing serious or personal. The main guy sitting on a garbage can called me ‘faggot’. No big deal. Keep going. Again “thats right faggot”. I turned around and swung. Luckily and much to my surprise and his it connected, knocking him off his perch. Looked epic, wasnt that hard. He never bugged me again.
Standing up to bullies can be successful or end badly. I lucked out twice and had an okay rest of my highschool. I didnt think it through I just reacted with raw anger and built up aggression. It only took 7 years from when the bullying started. Talk about a slow burning fuse.
If any one listens to the Elite fts podcasts I especially like the one where Dave Tate explains that he doesnt train for size or strength anymore (too injured to push hard enough). He goes to the gym for therapy. He touched on that here: Iron Evolution: Reflections – Part 1
Even looking at the thread topic again - Amanda Todd. Can you imagine what an hour in the gym. An hour of peace of mind. Having the mental silence that lifting weights brings. Having an outlet for stress and frustration. I imagine a totally different outcome.
[quote]pat wrote:
Occasionally, I had success. One time a guy gave me a wet-willy thinking I was passive as you guys apparently thought I was, just by instinct I punched him in the face. Then he kept messing with my paper in science so I stabbed his hand with my pencil and left some graphite in it, after that he left me alone, but it did not stop others. And when pretty popular girls join in you’re pretty much fucked.
I wasn’t passive, I was ineffective.[/quote]
Alright, mobs and girls pretty or not kind of leave you fucked. But good job letting loose on the one jerkass. And I dont think that was over reacting because I know what built up fustration can make you capable of. At least you didnt bottle it up and pull one of those old school schoolyard shivings. I bet his hand is scarred. I bet he remembers the kid he picked on one too many times. Its a good lesson to learn but it shouldnt need to be taught.
Too few people ever stand up. Your story makes me think of Green Street Holligans’
What the hell does this have to do with aggression? This isn’t a conversation about aggression and I don’t recall talking to you. For the record I have no problems with appropriately place aggression, never have. [/quote]
Eh, Looks like I had some ‘inappropriately placed aggression’ last night. But that is kinda the route this thread was taking: Aggression, being nice, dealing with bullies etc. somehow I got out of your posts (still am getting it) that you were against aggression.
This is what is classified as an open forum neh? Where people derp around and chime in as they please. [/quote]
No, I had my share of fights. It just did not work. I was a tiny kid. I weighed 65 lbs. in 6th grade, 85 in 8th. I was 125 lbs when I graduated high school. Whooping ass wasn’t my forte, but it wasn’t due to lack of effort. It was lack of ability and size. I took karate thinking that would help, that’s when I learned karate is a bit of a sham. Size and strength still win the day, so do numbers of people. In some way fighting seemed to make it worse because I wasn’t good at it. Perhaps if I could have done some real bodily harm then maybe, but I couldn’t.
Then there’s group think, when others join in, you cannot whoop a crowd’s ass. Occasionally, I had success. One time a guy gave me a wet-willy thinking I was passive as you guys apparently thought I was, just by instinct I punched him in the face. Then he kept messing with my paper in science so I stabbed his hand with my pencil and left some graphite in it, after that he left me alone, but it did not stop others. And when pretty popular girls join in you’re pretty much fucked.
I wasn’t passive, I was ineffective.[/quote]
I took a brief, successful stand against bullies and it was the making of me. I was bullied for the first two years of high school then I started martial arts like you but knocking out random moves during lessons when they’d bother me. Basic arm locks just to stop them.
Very quickly, I got into trouble for fighting other kids and the teachers remarked how out of character my behaviour was…
I gained a reputation in the eyes of my peers. That progressed to my former tormentors trying to manipulate me into bullying people for them. I could have been a bully and given myself an easy life with people who weren’t my true friends. I chose not to be manipulated and took from the experience a sense of empathy and a finely calibrated bullshit detector.
You weren’t ineffective. You’re just not built to be a bully.
[quote]csulli wrote:
Well this isn’t really related to bullying… but as far as being in the more “grown up” world, I honestly sort of have the “nice guy/beta male” personality, and I have a hard time being mean or confrontational. What’s cool though, is that there aren’t many guys out there who try to “take advantage” of a nice guy when he’s got a 50" chest and could throw them through a basketball hoop.
So I think the bigger you are, the more of a nice guy you can afford to be
Because what are those fucking pencil necks going to do about it?[/quote]
The average woman has the testosterone level of a hamster.
The only reason why she thinks she is Conan the Ovarian is because most men are utterly unwilling to embrace their inner asshole while she lives in C**tville, in Bitchavenue 666.
The average woman has the testosterone level of a hamster.
The only reason why she thinks she is Conan the Ovarian
[/quote]
Seriously…I just choked on hard boiled egg. Damn. LMAO. But all that is true. It was talked about in the “Bus driver uppercut” thread. Women just arent accountable for being bitches. So a pretty girl will be a ‘bully’ and if you tried standing up against her (verbally only, no falcon punches necessary) well every male would take her side because she is hot and every female will take her side because it is a male vs female situation.
Its a generalization but it will be true a hell of a lot more frequently than it will be wrong.
The average woman has the testosterone level of a hamster.
The only reason why she thinks she is Conan the Ovarian
[/quote]
Seriously…I just choked on hard boiled egg. Damn. LMAO. But all that is true. It was talked about in the “Bus driver uppercut” thread. Women just arent accountable for being bitches. So a pretty girl will be a ‘bully’ and if you tried standing up against her 9verbally only, no falcon punches necessary) well every male would take her side because she is hot and every female will take her side because it is a male vs female situation.
Its a generalization but it will be true a hell of a lot more frequently than it will be wrong.
[/quote]
And yet another thread that comes back to “it’s all genetics”.
The average woman has the testosterone level of a hamster.
The only reason why she thinks she is Conan the Ovarian
[/quote]
Seriously…I just choked on hard boiled egg. Damn. LMAO. But all that is true. It was talked about in the “Bus driver uppercut” thread. Women just arent accountable for being bitches. So a pretty girl will be a ‘bully’ and if you tried standing up against her 9verbally only, no falcon punches necessary) well every male would take her side because she is hot and every female will take her side because it is a male vs female situation.
Its a generalization but it will be true a hell of a lot more frequently than it will be wrong.
[/quote]
And yet another thread that comes back to “it’s all genetics”.[/quote]
Na, cant be.
If all men had been so utterly emasculated we would not have survived the ice age.
The average woman has the testosterone level of a hamster.
The only reason why she thinks she is Conan the Ovarian
[/quote]
Seriously…I just choked on hard boiled egg. Damn. LMAO. But all that is true. It was talked about in the “Bus driver uppercut” thread. Women just arent accountable for being bitches. So a pretty girl will be a ‘bully’ and if you tried standing up against her (verbally only, no falcon punches necessary) well every male would take her side because she is hot and every female will take her side because it is a male vs female situation.
Its a generalization but it will be true a hell of a lot more frequently than it will be wrong.
[/quote]
I googled it now and someone has come up with it before me.
